Has anyone here ever been a bridesmaid?

[Avocado LaSchaap]

I am going to be a bridesmaid for my cousin / good friend next year. So far all we've done is look at dresses, but the experience is already getting... interesting. She's a great person and the farthest thing from mean or selfish. But even so... I guess it doesn't help that I'm not a fan of the whole wedding thing in the first place. But it's not been fun. Not yet at least.

I was wondering if anyone else here has ever gone through it and if you enjoyed it or not. Do you like the tradition or do you think the modern wedding is getting out of hand? How did the bride behave? If you ever get married (or if you already have) would you follow all the traditions or would you look for any alternatives?

I'm a fan of tradition in general but ... like ... spending mad money and obsessing over wedding photos isn't tradition, man.

 

[Balverine]

I was a bridesmaid for my best friend! I had to drive all the way to Michigan from Missouri (13 hour drive) and it was the first time I met her in person lol

Her wedding was KIND OF traditional, but like, they had a Buddhist woman marry them, which was kind of cool.
Overall I enjoyed it all, besides her husband's family are all drunks haaa
We mainly just helped her pick out hair and accessories and stuff, then took a lot of pictures after the ceremony.
and she wasn't like bridezilla or anything, she did get stressed out a lot, but that's pretty common for brides lol

I can understand not enjoying it, though, as some people go crazy with the whole thing, especially if they're doing some kinda weird ceremony lol

 

[Avocado LaSchaap]

I was a bridesmaid for my best friend! I had to drive all the way to Michigan from Missouri (13 hour drive) and it was the first time I met her in person lol

Her wedding was KIND OF traditional, but like, they had a Buddhist woman marry them, which was kind of cool.
Overall I enjoyed it all, besides her husband's family are all drunks haaa
We mainly just helped her pick out hair and accessories and stuff, then took a lot of pictures after the ceremony.
and she wasn't like bridezilla or anything, she did get stressed out a lot, but that's pretty common for brides lol

I can understand not enjoying it, though, as some people go crazy with the whole thing, especially if they're doing some kinda weird ceremony lol

I'm glad to hear you had a good time. I know it differs a lot between weddings in terms of how involved the bridesmaids are supposed to be in the planning of the wedding. Having a Buddhist officiant sounds pretty cool. I went to a wedding once where the bride's father did the officiating. He's not like a professional or anything, he just did it for his daughter. I don't know how the couple felt about it but I thought it was awkward Dx.

 

[Balverine]

Ye, we didn't really plan at all. we planned the bachelorette party (which was all appropriate because two of the maids are 16 lol) and picked what style of dresses we'd wear

the worst part about it is that almost all of the groomsmen were really awkward and were like "yghifhidhfg i have to loop arms wITH A GIRL OMG" lmao

 

[Rizies]

I was a bride, and will most likely be a bridesmaid when my friend picks a date.

I was really lucky, and didn't ask much from my bridesmaids. They all agreed on the first dress I picked, and helped with all the set up and take down of the hall.

I'll be excited to be a bridesmaid. Way less stressful than being the bride. I'll get to sit and enjoy the party and help when needed!

 

[King Dorado]

I've only been the bride, never the bridesmaid

i've been a groomsman once and an usher twice at weddings. the only hard part about being a groomsman was being forced to play golf the weekend of the bachelor party, bc i'm terrible at golf.

one of the usher roles was actually the most difficult of the weddings for me to be involved in, bc my ex-girlfriend was one of the bridesmaids (and i had also secretly dated the bride at one point which i dont think my ex or the groom knew about), so i felt kinda awkward...

 

[tiffanistarr]

I've been a bridesmaid and planned many a wedding

the planning I love

being a bridesmaid is torture or maybe my friends suck

I can remember when my best friend got married we had a big group of friends but she simply couldn't afford to have all of them has bridesmaids so she had to decide who made the cut and so many people get butt hurt it was ridiculous

then there are the parents who try and decide what would be best for the bride or w/e and it's just a hassle and i remember the day of her wedding one of the girls who didn't make the cut to be a bridesmaid showed up in a white dress and that was a whole other fiasco. She had her ups and downs on being too needy or selfish but goodness at some points i just wanted to tell her i was out because she put so much emphasis and thoughts into a glorified party for her folks and forgot the real meaning of the day.

I have no desire to get married I was engaged and planned my own wedding once and luckily that relationship didn't work out but with all my experience with weddings i've learned that my dream wedding will be either non existent and it's just one of those mutual agreement kinda things or it's a quick paper signing at the court house.

It's really a case by case basis some friends I've been bridesmaids for have been low maintenance like hondas and some have been hell on wheels. I just always try and be as supportive as possible and do what i can. I understand the appeal to have your dream wedding because it's been chiseled into our brains as this thing we have to over do and go all out for. If that's how the bride is then I just always do my best to be there for them. Sometimes they need a reality check though.

 

[xXJessXx]

I was a Bridesmaid for my Auntie’s Wedding when I was 12 and I was super nervous and shy the whole day. When I was 14 my parents got married so I was a bridesmaid for them too

 

[Apriiil]

I am a bridesmaid for one of my close friends wedding! This will be my first time as well, but she is doing it so non-traditionally so it's easier. We are all finding our own dresses - only have to follow the color scheme which is great. It's just hard finding that color this time of year, but I am figuring it out!

Since it is non-traditional it feels so relaxed and I love it. Shes kind of a go with the flow kinda girl, and so I am! Makes for an easy time.

 

[Avocado LaSchaap]

I've been a bridesmaid and planned many a wedding

the planning I love

being a bridesmaid is torture or maybe my friends suck

I can remember when my best friend got married we had a big group of friends but she simply couldn't afford to have all of them has bridesmaids so she had to decide who made the cut and so many people get butt hurt it was ridiculous

then there are the parents who try and decide what would be best for the bride or w/e and it's just a hassle and i remember the day of her wedding one of the girls who didn't make the cut to be a bridesmaid showed up in a white dress and that was a whole other fiasco. She had her ups and downs on being too needy or selfish but goodness at some points i just wanted to tell her i was out because she put so much emphasis and thoughts into a glorified party for her folks and forgot the real meaning of the day.

I have no desire to get married I was engaged and planned my own wedding once and luckily that relationship didn't work out but with all my experience with weddings i've learned that my dream wedding will be either non existent and it's just one of those mutual agreement kinda things or it's a quick paper signing at the court house.

It's really a case by case basis some friends I've been bridesmaids for have been low maintenance like hondas and some have been hell on wheels. I just always try and be as supportive as possible and do what i can. I understand the appeal to have your dream wedding because it's been chiseled into our brains as this thing we have to over do and go all out for. If that's how the bride is then I just always do my best to be there for them. Sometimes they need a reality check though.

GUH the drama. I sort of feel bad for a bride when she feels pressure from her family or others to be throwing this amazing party, but really if you have that sort of people in your family they're going to find something to pick at you for no matter what. You have to make the decision to throw yourself a big white wedding in the first place. I agree my ideal wedding consists of me, the groom, and a courthouse xD

- - - Post Merge - - -

I am a bridesmaid for one of my close friends wedding! This will be my first time as well, but she is doing it so non-traditionally so it's easier. We are all finding our own dresses - only have to follow the color scheme which is great. It's just hard finding that color this time of year, but I am figuring it out!

Since it is non-traditional it feels so relaxed and I love it. Shes kind of a go with the flow kinda girl, and so I am! Makes for an easy time.

I wish I was free to choose my own dress. I don't see the appeal of having your bridesmaids look like a bunch of clones. My bride's aunt was trying to tell me and my sister that we would have to get a bottle tan or something before the wedding and we were like "Nope! Not happening! This is what we look like so choose a color that looks good with us as we are or deal with it!". When all's said and done its only the couple that matters anyway, you're not going to be looking through your wedding photos and thinking "the day would have been so much better if only my bridesmaids had been wearing this dress instead of that one!!!". You're not going to give a fig what style of dress your bridesmaids wear, so why not let them pick out something so at least they like it?

 

[AppleBitterCrumble]

I was a bridesmaid for my uncle last summer and from what I could tell everything went smoothly. I was only 15 at the time so I was most likely not seeing the whole behind the scenes but I got my nails done with all the other bridesmaids and the bride which was fun, we all got gift baskets with a robe to get ready in and some other items. I also got to get ready with them the day of the wedding in this room where a professional hair stylist and make up artist helped us get dolled up.

My uncle and aunt got married in a church by a priest and from what I could tell it was fairly traditional. No huge ceremony or anything, just family and some friends.

Also there wasn't a huge after party or anything, we just went back to their beach house and hung out on the beach and had a bonfire going.

We took pictures on the beach after the ceremony and got ice cream at this place thats close to the beach.

I'd say the whole experience was super chill and what I'd want my future wedding to resemble.

...then again I have a pintrest board that says otherwise (fairy tail/forest themed wedding )

 

[AppleBitterCrumble]

I was a bridesmaid for my uncle last summer and from what I could tell everything went smoothly. I was only 15 at the time so I was most likely not seeing the whole behind the scenes but I got my nails done with all the other bridesmaids and the bride which was fun, we all got gift baskets with a robe to get ready in and some other items. I also got to get ready with them the day of the wedding in this room where a professional hair stylist and make up artist helped us get dolled up.

My uncle and aunt got married in a church by a priest and from what I could tell it was fairly traditional. No huge ceremony or anything, just family and some friends.

Also there wasn't a huge after party or anything, we just went back to their beach house and hung out on the beach and had a bonfire going.

We took pictures on the beach after the ceremony and got ice cream at this place thats close to the beach.

I'd say the whole experience was super chill and what I'd want my future wedding to resemble.

...then again I have a pintrest board that says otherwise (fairy tail/forest themed wedding )

 

[annex]

I was the maid of honor at my brothers wedding, and a brides maid at my sisters. Now my youngest sister is getting married, and I'm the maid of honor.

 

[Ryumia]

Q: Has anyone here ever been a bridesmaid?

A: Not me. Never been a bridesmaid before. Though... It is great to read on the experience that people here had shared on the thread. I've only ever been a flower girl at my Aunt's wedding when I was kid. The experience wasn't something I remembered too much. But... I definitely remembered hating the rehearsal part of the wedding process. I did like throwing flower petals on the floor during the wedding and racing with the other flower girls to pick up the most flower petals after the wedding.