'callout culture'

[oath2order]

I literally just said that harassing someone is incorrect and that I only support calling out in the form of correcting someone and having a calm conversation about why you disagree with what they said

Being against transphobia and racism doesn't mean I support bullying, I think you're a little confused.

Harassing people over perceived transphobia and racism is bullying.

 

[bellionaire]

Harassing people over perceived transphobia and racism is bullying.

I just said I'm against harassing people you're just reading what you want to read rather than processing what I'm actually saying

 

[Sig]

WOAH what happened here..

 

[Cudon]

*snorts loudly*

Hm? Please be clear, I don't appreciate passive-agression.

 

[bellionaire]

WOAH what happened here..

idk man ppl who think its ok to refer to a transgender person as "a trans" think they have final say on trans rights lmao its a trainwreck honestly

 

[Sig]

idk man ppl who think its ok to refer to a transgender person as "a trans" think they have final say on trans rights lmao its a trainwreck honestly

jesus christ.

 

[seliph]

Hm? Please be clear, I don't appreciate passive-agression.

But I love it.
Anyways "trans" is an adjective, not a noun. You don't call someone "a trans".

 

[oath2order]

it's not taking consent away from anyone?? but there are cases where cis people are attracted to someone trans and are interested in dating UNTIL they find out they're trans and then they don't want to date them just because they're trans. if you aren't interested in someone, you aren't interested, but if you're interested up until you discover someone's trans, that's transphobic.

I like girls. I'm non binary. I don't care if a girl has a penis, vagina, or was defined at intersex at birth. A girl is a girl, if I'm interested in her, I'm interested in her. I don't determine my attraction based on whether someone is cis or trans.

I'm a cis gay male. If I was dating a trans man but didn't know it (which I would know, for the most part on dating sites that's one of the first things trans men put in their profile), I would really have to question things. Having the parts I like is kind of a big deal.

Determining your attraction based on whether someone is cis or not is an act of transphobia. I didn't even mention sex, yet you automatically linked trans people to genitalia. Trans people are more than their genitals, you have NO idea what a person's genitals are without them telling you. You have no idea whether a trans girl has a penis or vagina, whether a trans boy has a penis or vagina. So to refuse to date someone you were previously attracted to because you found out they were trans is an act of transphobia and an act of making assumptions about their genitals.

I like ****s, I want to date someone with a ****, that's not transphobic.

Saying "I don't think asian men are attractive" is claiming all Asian men have the same shape, same colour, and same size and is bottom line, racist. Someone from Thailand doesn't look like someone from Korea, or someone from Cambodia or India or China or Malaysia.

See, the way I perceive the "I don't think [race] is attractive" line is "The [race] men I have experienced are not attractive to me, therefore I am not going out of my way to date a [race] man." But that's just the way I see it. I'm white, I don't typically get ignored on dating sites because of my race.

 

[Sig]

YEAH MAN you can't call people 'a trans' that's really super transphobic yikes um, i think i'm going to get this thread locked now. it wasn't so the transphobic cishets can come and ruin it but i guess that's what it turned into

 

[Cudon]

idk man ppl who think its ok to refer to a transgender person as "a trans" think they have final say on trans rights lmao its a trainwreck honestly

What? I'm sorry I don't take part in lgbt- communities nor tumblr, therefore I have no idea what terms are rude and what are not. And I don't think I care either since I didn't mean anything bad by it. My point should not be void because I don't know the proper terminology. I only thought ''trans'' was a shortened word for transgender.

 

[Sig]

I'm a cis gay male. If I was dating a trans man but didn't know it (which I would know, for the most part on dating sites that's one of the first things trans men put in their profile), I would really have to question things. Having the parts I like is kind of a big deal.

you're literally dehumanizing someone by making it about what sex they have. that's pretty weird to me?

- - - Post Merge - - -

why can't i lock my own thread..

 

[Cudon]

YEAH MAN you can't call people 'a trans' that's really super transphobic yikes um, i think i'm going to get this thread locked now. it wasn't so the transphobic cishets can come and ruin it but i guess that's what it turned into

Just because I don't know the terms doesn't mean I'm transphobic, jesus. Also what's wrong with being cis? I have all the right to have my personal preferences and gender you know.

 

[oath2order]

you're literally dehumanizing someone by making it about what sex they have. that's pretty weird to me?

- - - Post Merge - - -

why can't i lock my own thread..

I'm attracted to ****s, that's not transphobic, nor is it dehumanizing. I just don't want to date someone with a vagina, that doesn't mean I think of them as any less of a person.

You can't lock your own thread outside of certain boards. You have to report the thread to get it locked, and that can take some time.

 

[seliph]

See, the way I perceive the "I don't think [race] is attractive" line is "The [race] men I have experienced are not attractive to me, therefore I am not going out of my way to date a [race] man."

I mean I don't know what "going out of my way to date someone" means because... who does that in the first place

But either way that's still making a stereotype and is still racist whether you mean it to be or not. Plus like I don't wanna sound like one of those people but you're a white guy, your perception of what's racist isn't as strong as a person of colour's who has experienced it first hand.

why can't i lock my own thread..

Just report the first post and say it's your thread and you want it closed.

 

[oath2order]

I mean I don't know what "going out of my way to date someone" means because... who does that in the first place

There are people solely attracted to black guys, Asian guys, etc. Granted, you could call it fetishizing a race, but that does happen.

But either way that's still making a stereotype and is still racist whether you mean it to be or not. Plus like I don't wanna sound like one of those people but you're a white guy, your perception of what's racist isn't as strong as a person of colour's who has experienced it first hand.

Yeah, I edited my post recently, I did address your last point.

 

[seliph]

And I don't think I care either since I didn't mean anything bad by it.

It's pretty rude to not care about using demeaning terminology just because you "didn't mean any harm". Do you support people who "playfully" throw around the F slur or the N word too?

I only thought ''trans'' was a shortened word for transgender.

"A transgender" still doesn't make sense though. You call someone a trans man/woman/person or a transgender man/woman/person not just "a trans" or "a transgender"

There are people solely attracted to black guys, Asian guys, etc. Granted, you could call it fetishizing a race, but that does happen.

Yeah, I edited my post recently, I did address your last point.

I do call it fetishizing because it's pretty much doing exactly the same thing as people who don't date (race).
And I didn't see your edit, I'm rather slow at replying, whoops.

 

[Reindeer]

I didn't even mention sex, yet you automatically linked trans people to genitalia.

It's almost like relationships are often built on sexual attraction. That's how it goes in the animal kingdom.

As for other stuff you said: some people want to conceive children themselves with their partner. While it is possible for transwomen to get pregnant with donor eggs, it is not with their own egg (because they were originally male, y'know). That might be a deal breaker for some. Same with transmales, they can't produce sperm so donor sperm is needed.

Rejection at such a late stage might be on religious grounds as well, which is why I brought it up. Even if they've gone through a full gender reassignment, transsexuals are considered to be the sex assigned at birth in these religions. That means a man can't marry a transwoman, it's considered gay marriage.

We know damn well that's not the same thing.
Only dating someone who's a part of your religion is different than not dating an entire race. It's similar to the issue above: Saying "I don't think asian men are attractive" is claiming all Asian men have the same shape, same colour, and same size and is bottom line, racist. Someone from Thailand doesn't look like someone from Korea, or someone from Cambodia or India or China or Malaysia. Dating people within your religion is not looking down on people for a stereotypical look they have.

My point on religion was mostly in regards to transsexual people, so I don't see why both you and bellionaire decided to focus on race there. Transsexuals are seen as their sex assigned at birth, even if they go through a full gender reassignment surgery. That means that a male and a trans-girl marrying is not allowed.

Though since you both mentioned race, Muslims of certain movements are encouraged to only marry within their "race". For example, in these movements, white and Asian people are considered kafirs and can never hold the same rights as a Muslim of that certain "race", even if they fully convert to islam. Thus, they are rejected based on race.


I don't agree with it either, but I definitely don't agree with bullying these people for their decision.

 

[bellionaire]

Just because I don't know the terms doesn't mean I'm transphobic, jesus. Also what's wrong with being cis? I have all the right to have my personal preferences and gender you know.

nothing wrong with being cis, there's something very wrong with dehumanizing trans people

trans is short for transgender, but avoid the phrasing "a trans"

 

[seliph]

My point on religion was mostly in regards to transsexual people, so I don't see why both you and bellionaire decided to focus on race there.

Because that's what the original point was about.

Transsexuals are seen as their sex assigned at birth, even if they go through a full gender reassignment surgery. That means that a male and a trans-girl marrying is not allowed.

Yep, and that's what you call transphobia.

Anyways neither of us are advocating for bullying? We've both literally said to talk to people informatively and not harass them.

 

[Reindeer]

Yep, and that's what you call transphobia.

It's also their religion.