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The "You're Banned" Game

Banned because I know what you did. All the evidence points to it. You know what I know did. Or maybe you don't. It's that thing you did when you thought no one was looking. When the world turned a blind eye, when you had all the power in the world. Newsflash: you didn't. It didn't. I didn't. I saw it. And you're facing the punishment. Yes you got it right, I'm banning you and you can never come back. You're pretty lucky that I don't tell the police. But they have no part in this, it's my problem. But now it's no-one's problem but your own. Banned.
 
Banned because you're planning on having soup without the proper permission from your designated tiger. He was too busy eating corn flakes while you consumed fire hydrant water for the benefit of your own bladder. This concludes us to believe that a malefactor like you has participated in lonlethal loitering at a public gas station because you ran out of broccoli pudding for your previously mentioned soup. Now your tiger must attend anger management classes to get over his fear of doughnuts, all because of you. Thus, you are banned.
 
Banned for telling people to take your breath away.
 
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