Help my friend

[Candyland791]

I'm 15 and I still haven't kiseed anybody and I think it's perfectly fine^^
I think she shouldn't abandon all her traits because thats what makes her HER.
I myself am kind of like her, I love watching anime, listening to emo music, I'm extremely introverted and daydreaming all day, I don't believe in God and I think everyone has something that is just characteristic for him/her. I used to have low self-esteem when it came to this theme about kissing and other experiences, but I've built up some self-confidence and in my opinion, sometime I will find the right person and so will she. She really shouldnt change her personality and force her to be another person.
She should just believe in herself.^^

 

[SublimeDonut]

So I don't think that she is a loser (such a harsh word) or should be in any way embarassed about it. And I am pretty sure that there is a lot of boys out there, that would love a girl like her, because she's
different and different is always cool. Kind of reminds me of myself actually.
I was always the girl with way different interests, style, etc. and yet I found someone while I wasn't
even searching. She shouldn't worry about something like this at this age and.. and actually a question.

a party at this age? Like, was it a real party with alcohol and stuff? O__O

oh no no! just a barbecue dinner in a friend's house. i mean, some of my friends do drink alcohol... but not me and definetely not my best friend.

 

[Warrior]

I'm not trying to condescend but you guys seem like babies to me, I think about myself at 15 and its like wow, I was an INFANT.

I had my first kiss at 17, after being in a relationship with the person for a year, and I never did anything further than that for several years, being with the same person. Kissing and sex and all that - it's ones personal business. You shouldn't do it because you feel like you have to, even if she got a boyfriend or hell even a girlfriend - even then she wouldn't have to kiss anyone. What you do with your own body is your own business. She doesn't need to tell anyone else what experiences she does or doesn't have - and to be frank I feel like the friends spreading their personal lives around like that are pretty trashy, but that's just my opinion.

Even if someone goes their whole life without kissing anyone or without having sex - it literally doesn't matter to the everyday people they interact with. The only thing that matters is that a person is kind and respectful to others, literally nothing else is the business of other people. In my mind you and your friend both are way too young to be worrying about this kinda thing... trust me, when you get to be my age you'll realise men really aren't worth fussing over at all lol!

Good luck to both of you, don't do anything you feel uncomfortable with ever

 

[Hatori]

She's definitely not a loser and shouldn't feel like one either. She should also keep being herself and not change for anyone, unless she herself wants to change for the better. I'm kind of the shy and quiet type in person; when I was in high school, I had a bit of a hard time making friends and I was worried people wouldn't like me for who I am either (I love listening to metal as well, I wore dark clothing and got bullied quite a bit) but I still did my best to keep being who I was because that's what I was comfortable with. I shouldn't change just so someone can like that facade I made of myself. Later on in high school, I re-connected with a friend back from middle school -- found out we had a lot in common and soon enough we got in a relationship and am still together with them to this day. I'm 23 now and I don't regret being myself. You're bound to find someone you have something in common with, just give it time!

I agree with what's been said above -- what anyone does with their body is their own business and no one is entitled to know every single thing like such. I was always annoyed at the fact that teens and adults would be made fun of for not having kissed or had sexual relations yet, just seems absurd to me. Why should it matter to anyone else?

Just be comfortable with yourself and be happy with what you like and who you are!

 

[raeyoung]

gosh I'm way late to this, but yes. I used to be insanely gloomy about having been single all my life. I haven't had a relationship ever to this day, and I'm fifteen. I've never been kissed, but I'm guilty of having crushes, some more intense than others. From experience, I can say being desperate was never good. I even lost some of my closest friends because I would put a boy who would never like me as a higher priority. The desperation caused me to put myself down a lot, but I realized I was too young anyway. I realized that I don't need to be kissing people or dating or even other stuff to be happy. I'm content not having a crush on anyone at this moment, being single. It's a good life, it really is.

Tell her to enjoy her youth, to enjoy what she has. Relationships, especially at this age, never really last. There's more to the life we live than the romance and lovey dovey stuff. It's nice, but there are other things in life that are so much more worth the time. At this point in life, it's better to focus on school and the things she likes to do and considers a possible career path, because her success in life itself is more important than her success in having love right this moment. Just because other people have it doesn't mean she has to. She can enjoy her life differently than anyone else. She doesn't have to feel left out because she'll find someone amazing one day. It may not be now, but it will come and she shouldn't feel the need to rush into it.