some kids do deserve to have their phone looked at if they're doing things they shouldn't be.
someone i know got their phone searched through by their mom, and her mom seen that she was sending nudes to everybody, including people who were way too old to be talking to her in the first place. she was messaging older men on facebook as well. Her mom suspected she was up to something, because she was acting sketchy, and she was right.
she was also posting toxic things to facebook and her mom put a stop to that as well. if a phone is given to you by your parents, and you're living under their roof then they are allowed to check up on you now and then to see if you're behaving.
she has two kids now from two different dads and she is a junior in high school
her mom still trusts her and doesnt look through her phone. sometimes you dont need to be friends to your children so they don't do anything that their parents dont want them to
there's really easy ways to hide things, its just technology.
it really is to just prevent things from happening.
this isn't the thread posters case. but this is why parents should look through phones.
if you aren't doing anything wrong then it shouldn't be a problem tho like idc who touches my phone and goes through it and i have some weird **** on there lol
ok but i wasnt talking about situations like that. also it's a lot better to talk to the kid than to break their trust ha ha
the whole "if youre not doing anything wrong you shouldnt have anything to hide !!!!!!" have you ever heard anout privacy and integrity.
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I like my parents, even if they did that to me. I love my parents, they are amazing.
I don't understand how someone could just say you don't have to like your parents.:'(
But you do have to respect them, even if you don't like them. I mean they are paying for your phone, your internet, food, clothes... ik some people who have strict and judgmental parents but they just act that way because they care and worry and dont realize theyre doing it in a toxic way
lmao no
i think youre speaking from your perspective, but just because your parents are good doesnt mean everyone elses parents are. there is such a strong "you have to love your parents or you are literally satan" attitude in society and it sucks. no one has to tolerate being treated badly and kids dont have to feel any love fir their parents just because the parents are their parents.
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If I'm living under your roof free of charge and you read the diary you gave me that's on your property I would think of it as not really mine in the first place. Your property, your item, even if you handed it to me to use. Same if it's a paid online diary - if you're paying for it and your name is on the bill then I don't really consider it mine even if I'm the one using it. I respect your right to what you pay for and is IMO rightfully yours.
I don't think punching someone is a great comparison. I'd compare it to being at my job on my free time or the library using one of their devices. In that situation the owner of the device (the company or library) has every right to monitor what I do on that device. Even if it's my phone on their wifi they still have the right to monitor me because I'm not paying for the wifi.
Heck, even though I pay for my phone and Internet at home I would be naive to think that I'm not being monitored by the company providing it to me.
And if you think me understanding the point of view of a snooper makes me one (Sheila) that's not true. I can understand something and not get up in arms if it happens to me while also not doing the action myself.
My whole point with this discussion is that there's two sides to every story. Again I think OP understands that and will grow to have a better bond with his parents.
lol
ofc there are two sides to it but that doesnt mean it's ok. you can't do just anything and say that it's okay because you think you're doing the right thing or protecting someone. this is one of those things that are gross to do
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i believe a kid deserves their privacy, and they should learn to have their own safe space and feel safe in that space, basically their home. my uncle has an one year old son, and he has a playpen in the living room. if he is in it and chilling, his parents will knock on the little door, and ask "can i come in?" i thought it was adorable, and it's a great way to teach kids that their space is theirs, and he has to give permission. of course, he can't even speak yet, but it's conditioning him to know that before someone barges in they have to ask.
i do believe trust is a two way street, if you're not being completely honest to your mom about your feelings, she has every right to not be honest with you. i just went to the doctor today, and i was being told how families are supposed to support each other and find ways to compromise, or be honest with each other to be properly healthy. she even told me a way to communicate your feelings without starting to blame others:
1. "what happened?" this question is supposed to show what happened in everyone's eyes, things that people can plainly see or hear. no emotions or bias, just plain and simple "what happened?"
2. "how do you feel?" not "how did they make you feel?" because you should be in charge of your own emotions. so you explain how you feel to the other person.
3. "How can you change what has happened?" basically how can the same situation happen differently, but with a positive effect. tell her how you don't like her snooping, and if she has questions or concerns she should go to you because you are capable of being honest with her.
i get what you mean w the trust is a two way street thing But there are a lot of things that parents don't need to know. kids have a right to have privacy
n thinking that it's fine to gi thru someone elses phone because they don't tell u every single detail of their life is ****ed up
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I would like to add my dad never touched my phone (he doesn't know how to use it anyways) but I never gave him a reason not to trust me.... My mom would, but she never found anything so she stopped lol.
(and I never deleted my text messages... ever lol)
ok but maybe you have a good relationship with your parents and dont have to fear that they will use whatever they saw against you :')
also the giving someone a reasong thing is so stupid bc people still deserve their privacy and nosy ass parents **** their kids up
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what im trying to say is that it is great if you have a good relationship with your parents but if someone's home situation sucks and they feel the need to keep everything about them from their family because of things that the family has done in the past, then that is 100% ok and understandable. i dont care if you "should" tell your parents about normal stuff like homework or what you think of something, if they have lost your trust you dont have to give them anything. going into this extreme defence mode is a way to survive the situation lmao it's not really because youre ab edgy teen who hates your parents for no reason
when i was younger i had a plan/idea/dream to move to another country and basically ghost my parents as soon as i turned 18 just to get away from them because my home situation was Bad and i constantly had to be defensive, careful and take a bunch of precautions before i did anything or my parents would ruin the little bit of safety and stability i had in my life. i've gotten better at coping with it (and hiding everything from them) and i've gotten a lot less tolerant which is funny and useful because my mom gets sad when i get cold and angry with her, which gives me more control over the situation :')
i dont care if im a Horrible Child for doing these things i just want to not get more ****ed up by my parents n i wanna have them ruin as few things as possible in my life