What's Bothering You?

I feel my depression starting up again I’m trying to fight it, but I can’t. Maybe I should just give in and eat all the food I don’t let myself eat and watch movies and cry.
 
So uhhhhhh one of the cats just wandered into my room and peed on my bean bag????



I really don't wanna have to spend$200 to buy a new bean bag cause my dumbass cats don't know how to use a litter box.
 
So uhhhhhh one of the cats just wandered into my room and peed on my bean bag????



I really don't wanna have to spend$200 to buy a new bean bag cause my dumbass cats don't know how to use a litter box.

somebodys gonna need to get a good whiff of vinegar
 
Just found out my father fell down at work. I sure hope he's alright
 
I can't stop thinking about work and that I'm on my last legs, and what both that ******* customer and the store manager said to me.

Not only that but I'm depressed like all the time. I sit and do nothin cause nothing brings me any joy anymore. I'm tired and I have headaches so I can't even do the things I like.

But somethin more serious, my store has a positive case for Corona virus, someone in the department right next to mine got it. Yet the store just 'sanitized' that whole department, sent home only people who came into contact with them for longer than 5 minutes, only did tracing for 72 hours even thou the virus can be in you for 2 weeks without symptoms, and called it a day. Like, this is some corporate **.
 
I can't stop thinking about the stuff I'm getting in the mail so I can't fall asleep. It's kinda sad that this is the most exciting thing happening in my life rn.
(Though ngl getting a wah plush is def an exciting experience)

I also wish it was cooler outside, been having to fall asleep with my AC on because the only way I can really be comfy in bed is if I'm in a really cold room covered up in a big blanket. But I know that it costs a lot to run AC units so I basically either have to suffer through the heat or feel guilty about using the AC ://///

Edit: so apparently he's now about an hour south of here at a distribution center, I can only dream but what if he gets here tomorrow?? :0
 
Just got back home from driving and all. I feel a little disoriented, and I think it's because of the bright headlights. Need to adjust to 'em.
 
Work’s been stressing me out lately. I feel like my blood pressure spikes every time there’s a text because I’m scared it’ll be the manager fussing at me for some small thing.

I also have to go on vacation with the family, which means leaving my apartment and my boyfriend to go spend a week with them in a beach house. I’m excited to see my brother, but my mom stresses me the heck out. I’m also a bit worried for the drive, I’ve never driven that far before by myself.
 
It has reached a point where I simply just don’t want to exist for a few weeks. I’m so tired of being anxious all the time and stressed 24/7 and crying every single night over someone who never cared in the first place. And never will care. I am so sick of being so... vulnerable all the time. Does this come with an off button? Is there a way to hide this in a way where I can live a normal life without showing or feeling any emotions? Asking for a friend.

also.

I had cut off a few people I’ve known for about 8 years, they’re actually how I met my ex in the first place. But one of them does not seem to be getting the hint WHAT SO EVER. I blocked her everywhere because she has been nothing but insensitive to me. Making excuses for my ex, trying to pardon what he did to me, telling me how to feel and she even had the audacity to tell me it was time for ME to forget about him. Like lol, you do not get to decide that for me? Just because we’ve met in real life and have known each other for years does not mean you know what is best for me. She has contacted my close friends and even texted my aunt AND my mother asking them why I blocked her. I do not owe you an explanation. I do not owe you anything. Leave my family and friends out of this and take a hint.

annyywaaays.

The past few weeks have been very crazy for me. I’m sick of crying so much. I’m sick of feeling emotions. Can I just become numb lol.
 
My head is fuzzy due to lack of sleep, 4 whole pots of coffee, and how unbearable this heat is. I feel like I dunked my brain in a hot spring.
 
The one night I want to watch anime Twist.moe doesn't work.. I just wanted to finally watch Your Name :C
 
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