I sometimes wonder if I was not raised in a toxic environment from my childhood, my life could've been better, but now its already done and there is nothing I can do about it. Whenever something positive actually does happen to me its hard for me to even smile because I have become so emotionally numb to all the negativity I had to deal with throughout my entire life. I don't know weather that makes me feel good or bad. I really do dislike when people try to make behave a certain way that causes my feelings and emotions to get bottled up inside of me to the point where I have a mental breakdown. I really cannot handle all this stress and it really makes me avoid talking to anyone.
