Fat Judgement

[Valzed]

actually im certain if you knew someone regardless of their weight, being driven into poverty for buying in excess, most people would judge them.

i know u said "snap" judgment but like..its hard to compare something like that if you see someone wearing a pair of shoes at a store and buying another you dont know that they have that problem. but if you see someone overweight, the fact is that you know theyre overweight and if you see them buying a donut you may be thinking theyre contributing to that issue. so those are kinda different but i can see where youre coming from.

What if that overweight person hasn't eaten at all that day & the donut is a quick snack on the go? Or what if the overweight person is actually buying the donut for another person and doesn't intend to eat it at all? No one considers those options. They see an overweight person with unhealthy food and think, "That's why you're fat." A judgement was made instantly about the overweight person. I doubt many people even give a thought as to why the skinny person is buying another pair of shoes. There's no judgement of that person made on sight.

- - - Post Merge - - -

Then we are on the same page Just wanted to clarify things with you, is all...

Oh definitely! I'm glad you did - it's always healthier to discuss issues like these.

 

[vel]

Yes, unfortunately it is human nature to judge, but it's up to you whether to voice your opinion or not. I don't judge them in a "ugly" standpoint because I believe being overweight does not equal ugly, I judge them in a health/medical based standpoint. If they start nearing the dangerous overweight, or they suddenly gain if I knew them before, then I wonder a bit. I never say these things out loud though, it's rude unless they say it's alright.

 

[matt]

Guess if people get fat, it's their choice and I'm sure they know what they're doing wrong (minimal exercise, full fat eating) and they know that putting on weight and not excersise clogs the arteries and puts strain on the ticker.

I understand that people sometimes overload their weight which they are unable to prevent due to health restrictions

I don't mind fat people but when they're lazy and cbb to do things themselves and start asking me to do stuff which is considerably annoying when they could lose 2000 calories by walking 5 feet to get the TV remote.

 

[kayleee]

The ?judgement? I have for overweight people only extends to being glad I don?t look like them
But I don?t treat fat people any differently than I treat skinny people

 

[TheGreatBrain]

No, I don't judge them. They're just like everyone else. Some people smoke, drink, over eat, gamble, do drugs, eat unhealthy, starve themselves, etc, etc. No ones perfect, and just because someones fat, doesn't mean they aren't beautiful.

 

[RedTropicalPeachyFish]

What if that overweight person hasn't eaten at all that day & the donut is a quick snack on the go? Or what if the overweight person is actually buying the donut for another person and doesn't intend to eat it at all? No one considers those options.

But that doesn't only happen to fat people actually. For example, I know someone who's seen "whore" now and then by neighbors for being a bit younger to have a child, yet having/taking care of a girl. (shhh... I'm not saying it's me. )
While I admit it's a bit thoughtless of them, everyone neither has time to deeply think about others life factors nor is obligated to do so. The best way I'd take those times is to help them get to know me better, so some of them change the way how they treat me at times, and when they don't I most likely to not mind much. Since always there are those people around. ( Although sometimes I kind of feel wtf from how they people could be so brainwashed. Shhh... )
Just feeling like offended about their wrong judge could be passively offensive?

 

[BambieTheMayor]

I don't judge. I really don't even think about it, like, at all. I personally think it's none of my business (and I'm usually lost in my thoughts and don't pay attention to what's going on around me... hah...)

But no, I don't think anything negative. As I used to struggle with my weight, I can understand that it's not just bad eating habits/laziness. It could be genetics. It could be a mental disorder (depression, bipolar, etc.) and food is their comfort (well, I suppose that could be under the bad eating habit but you get what I mean, right? At least it's eating and not harming themselves).

What I'm saying is that a lot of people see fat as a real black and white area. You're either fat because you have bad eating habits/you're lazy, or you're skinny. But that's not always the case. There's a gray area that a lot of people don't see.

I don't judge because I don't know what their life is like, what they go home to, if it's genetics... I don't know. And therefore, I don't feel like I have any right to judge.

Maybe I'm just overthinking it, but that's my opinion.

 

[Valzed]

But that doesn't only happen to fat people actually. For example, I know someone who's seen "whore" now and then by neighbors for being a bit younger to have a child, yet having/taking care of a girl. (shhh... I'm not saying it's me. )
While I admit it's a bit thoughtless of them, everyone neither has time to deeply think about others life factors nor is obligated to do so. The best way I'd take those times is to help them get to know me better, so some of them change the way how they treat me at times, and when they don't I most likely to not mind much. Since always there are those people around. ( Although sometimes I kind of feel wtf from how they people could be so brainwashed. Shhh... )
Just feeling like offended about their wrong judge could be passively offensive?

Sadly, you're correct. Many, many different groups of people are unfairly judged every second of every day. However, since this particular thread's focus was on judgement of fat people, I addressed that specific group of people. I feel terrible that the young lady you're speaking of is being judged by her neighbors but I'm guessing by your comments that since the people judging her are her neighbors that the neighbors may know her just well enough to know she became a mother/step mother/caretaker at a young age. In my scenario the overweight person is being judged by 100% total strangers who know absolutely nothing about the overweight person and have based their judgment purely on the overweight person's appearance. I would think most overweight people (and any other group of people) would be happy to sit down with every single stranger who has ever judged them solely on their looks and try to let the stranger get to know them. I'm sure most people in general would love the chance to change the way strangers treat them. This seems unlikely to occur though - especially since no one is obligated or has the time to think deeply about other peoples lives.

I'm not quite sure how the overweight person in my scenario was being passively offensive when they weren't interacting with the strangers who may be secretly judging them based solely on their appearance. I'm also not sure how any unfairly judged individual who feels offended by being unfairly judged is passively offending the person who has wrongly judged them. Is the unfairly judged person not permitted to be offended by the wrong judgment the other person has made of them?

 

[RedTropicalPeachyFish]

Is the unfairly judged person not permitted to be offended by the wrong judgment the other person has made of them?

No, not not permitted. If you feel you're unfairly judged, and if you want to be, you can be offended. 'Cause it's not a matter of right or wrong. How you take things, how you react to it is up to you. 'Cause your life is yours, regardless if you're fat or skinny or very nice body. Just that I'd rather try what I can possibly do than just feel offended. Because I want to make my place be more comfortable.

Also,

but I'm guessing by your comments that since the people judging her are her neighbors that the neighbors may know her just well enough to know she became a mother/step mother/caretaker at a young age.

Ah no. Depending on the region and environment, neighbors are purely just strangers who happen to live near. You can believe me. So, the situation is equivalant to the situation of a certain group of people. ( in this thread fat people? )

 

[Valzed]

No, not not permitted. If you feel you're unfairly judged, and if you want to be, you can be offended. 'Cause it's not a matter of right or wrong. How you take things, how you react to it is up to you. 'Cause your life is yours, regardless if you're fat or skinny or very nice body. Just that I'd rather try what I can possibly do than just feel offended. Because I want to make my place be more comfortable.

Also,



Ah no. Depending on the region and environment, neighbors are purely just strangers who happen to live near. You can believe me. So, the situation is equivalant to the situation of a certain group of people. ( in this thread fat people? )

In this thread I created a scenario in which a person, in this case to stay on the thread's topic, an overweight person, was judged on their appearance by strangers. The overweight person never shows any reaction - neither a sign of acceptance or of being offended. My point was that the skinny person who self medicates by buying high priced shoes is not judged as harshly, if at all, like the overweight person who is buying a donut is judged. I made no mention of either parties feelings.

I have been overweight for 40+ years so in my own personal life I've learned to not let what others think about me get to me. Life is too short and too precious.

I've already agreed with you that other groups of people are judged unfairly. I still agree that the girl you're speaking of is being wrongly judged. When I see the term "neighbors" in my mind these are people who live right next door or in the same apartment building who may have spoken with the girl you spoke of or someone who may know her. Had you said townspeople or village residents or citizens I would have realized that strangers were the ones making the unfair judgement.

I'm not looking to fight with or upset others on this forum but considering this thread was focused on the singular group of fat people and not about every group who may be being judged, I don't mean to be blunt but your comment still did not seem relevant. Is the young lady you're speaking of overweight and being judged as "stupid" or "lazy" because of her size? If so then that would be sadly relevant. If this thread were about every group of humans who has been or is being unfairly judged by other human beings than there would be many, many, many more situations to discuss. I'm not trying to be dismissive of how the young lady is being treated - believe me - having become a mom at 16 I can absolutely relate. It is 1000% wrong for the people in her town or any other people to judge her without knowing her story. That doesn't change the fact that her situation just doesn't seem to fit in with the topic of the thread being focused on the judgement of fat people.

It seems we agree that many groups of people are unfairly judged every day. It also seems that we agree that how a person responds to that judgment is their choice. We agree that the young lady you spoke of shouldn't be treated as she has been. I'm truly sorry for the young lady and I hope she can hold her head up and be proud of who she is no matter her situation or what others may think of her.

 

[MozzarellaSticks]

I just remembered the time I opened a patient’s chart & someone had noted in her medica history “obesity due to excess calories.” I nearly pissed myself.

This has little bearing on the topic. I just thought it was an amusing anecdote.

 

[Katelyn]

Are you diabetic?

I take offense to that, as I am diabetic.
Not overweight, but amputation doesn't come from being immobile. :-/

No offense, but I highly doubt they were talking about diabetic people. It seems as though they were talking about people who can help being unhealthy but choose not to

 

[RedTropicalPeachyFish]

but considering this thread was focused on the singular group of fat people and not about every group who may be being judged, I don't mean to be blunt but your comment still did not seem relevant. Is the young lady you're speaking of overweight and being judged as "stupid" or "lazy" because of her size? If so then that would be sadly relevant.

Ew I don't really think so. Since this is discussion board, I can state my opinion, about fat people, judgement they could possibly get, affect of it and things around it?

My point is that those judgements fat people could get is a sub category of larger frame of unfair judgement. So I proposed different way to approach it from that view, so things could feel easier for you ( those who are fat and hurt from being judged ). "Young lady" case is just an example, for better understanding, not the point itself.
Nothing's personal here.

 

[Valzed]

Ew I don't really think so. Since this is discussion board, I can state my opinion, about fat people, judgement they could possibly get, affect of it and things around it?

My point is that those judgements fat people could get is a sub category of larger frame of unfair judgement. So I proposed different way to approach it from that view, so things could feel easier for you ( those who are fat and hurt from being judged ). "Young lady" case is just an example, for better understanding, not the point itself.
Nothing's personal here.

Of course you're free to state your opinion about whatever you want whenever or wherever you want. At no point did I ever say you weren't able to give your opinion. In fact I never mentioned your opinion. I said your comment, meaning your example, did not seem relevant.

I hope any people reading this who may be fat and hurt from being judged will appreciate you sharing your different way to approach being judged. I hope the human being in your example can benefit from your different approach to being judged as well.

 

[michealsmells]

Do you think more negative about someone who is overweight than you
would someone who's not overweight? Please think about it & be honest.

I myself am obese (not so much physically as just... I'm right on the cusp of overweight/obese BMI) and I know for a fact a lot of it has to do with poor eating habits and health choices. However, It also has to do a lot with genetics in my family. PLUS I'm a growing girl in her teens. There's a lot of factors that go into it, so I wouldn't judge people.

 

[Deca]

Are you diabetic?

I take offense to that, as I am diabetic.
Not overweight, but amputation doesn't come from being immobile. :-/

No I'm not, and yes I'm aware of it which is why I used the word "or"

Edit: Are you type 1 or 2 diabetic? Cause type 2 can be reversed in its early stage by switching to a healthy diet...

 

[Buttonsy]

Kind of disgusted to see how 50/50 the polls are, didn't realize people were still so narrow-minded and judgemental in 2018. I don't judge people fatter than me cuz I'm already pretty fat.