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misheard lyrics or quotes

when Starboy by the weeknd came on, i always used to think he said “house so empty, need a centipede” instead of “house so empty, need a centerpiece”,
and it also sounded like he said “you talkin’ money, need a hand grenade” instead of “you talkin‘ money, need a hearing aid”

why someone would notice that their house is empty and IMMEDIATELY think of a centipede is beyond me. :,)
 
From Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young's cover of Joni Mitchell's Woodstock:

Misheard lyric:
"And I dreamed I saw the bomber jet planes flying shotgun in the sky,
Turning into f***** up flies above our nation."

Actual lyric:
"And I dreamed I saw the bomber jet planes riding shotgun in the sky,
Turning into butterflies above our nation."
 
Some songs:

“Viva La Vida” by Coldplay— Something about the enemy’s (expletive for butt) instead of eyes.

“Pour Some Sugar On Me” by Def Leppard— More like “Pour Some Sugar On MAY”.


“The Leader of the Pack” by the Shangri-Las— For some reason, in one part I hear “they told me he was fat” instead of “they told me he was bad.”

“Lollipop (Candyman)” by Aqua— “Bubble yum” instead of “bubble gum”, but same meaning though.

“She Bop” by Cyndi Lauper— One part it sounds like “beret bop?”

“Little Red Corvette” by Prince— For some reason I hear “we need a red corvette.”

“Blinded by the Light” by Manfred Mann and the Earth Band— Everyone hears “wrapped up like a (feminine hygiene product starting with d)” instead of “revved up like a deuce” and I agree.

“…Baby One More Time” by Britney Spears— I hear “hit me aside” or “give me a side” instead of “give me a sign.”

“I Stay in Love” by Mariah Carey— RuPaul said it sounded like she said “fart like a whale” instead of “front like, ‘oh well’’ and now I can’t unhear it. 😂
 
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in helena by my chemical romance i hear “GAMMERR TIMEE” instead of “came a time”
NO I JUST LISTENED TO IT AND I'M NEVER GOING TO BE ABLE TO FORGET THIS NOW
 
in speak now by taylor swift, i thought it was “4 or 5 looks from everyone in the room“ instead of ”horrified look from everyone in the room” and i was so confused as to why more people weren’t reacting to taylor swift objecting at a wedding.
 
I always thought that the Backyardigans theme song said "you're with your friends", but apparently it says "more with your friends".
 
Uptown Funk

(I know what the lyrics are, but the first time I heard it I thought it said Dragon balls and retirement. I obviously knew that wasn't what it was lol so I had to look it up. But even now I like that verse better anyway so I just think back to that every time I hear the song.)
 
When I saw this thread just now I was reminded of a misheard line from "Holy Wars...The Punishment Due" by Megadeth that I remember @ZeldaCrossing64 bringing up in the "Out of context quotes" thread. It was "Next thing you know, they'll take my dogs away" instead of "Next thing you know, they'll take my thoughts away". It was funny enough that I had to make a drawing out of it.

Actually, I tend to mishear that line sometimes, except it's like, "Next thing you know, they'll take my arms away".
 
"I'm a blonde bimbo girl in a fantasy world" in Barbie Girl by Aqua.

Often mishear the word bimbo. And apparently a common one as a lot of people seem to hear "emo" instead, despite it not being fitting for the decade it was released.
 
In “Hips Don’t Lie”, when Shakira singing, “I’m starting to feel it’s right”, I thought she sang “I’m starting to feel it’s Friday.” And I thought, “Perfect! Like TGIF!” But I was wrong lol
 
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