racial preferences in dating

[tumut]

Is it racist to have racial/ethnic preferences when dating? I know a lot of people who say they don't want to date black people et cetera.

I personally don't like white guys 90 percent of the time, and prefer guys who are Hispanic like me or some other minority.

I'm honestly not sure how to feel about this subject because I know some people who have been told straight up "Oh I don't like x guys" which is rude as ****. I also think it's weird how close minded some people are about it, saying they would never feel attracted to a certain type of person.

 

[Tomoe Hotaru]

I personally don?t find this racist at all. For me skin color is like hair color, most people have a preference.
Even if someone says they won?t give a person with X-trait a chance, that?s only them limiting their dating pool, why should I care about it? If someone told me there was something about my appearance that they disliked enough to not want to date me, I would just be happy they were honest and move on. No harm done.

 

[Romaki]

Yeah, it's not like one race just looks and acts one way. If "hispanic" is your preference, would you just dismiss a white person who could pass as one?

 

[Kamzitty]

I personally have no preference on race when it comes to dating. I've had crushes on/been with many different people of all types of races so I don't see why certain people limit themselves like that. The way a person looks on the outside does not determine the type of person they are on the inside.
If people have a preference I guess that's fine??? But if someone were to downright refuse to date ANYONE of a certain race, for no reason other than the color of their skin or physical traits, I would see that as racist.

 

[Rabirin]

I think it's fine to have a racial preference in dating. In my opinion it doesn't mean that you're racist, just that you have a preference. How you put your opinion across on that though, is a different story.

 

[EpicGamer12]

I actually brought this up on the forum once and I was called racist for having a preference.

 

[Clefarious]

I actually don't care about race when it comes to dating but I noticed going by my past relationships that I tend to date mostly one race. I do agree though that it's really just a preference and you can't actually control who you are attracted to. I feel like a lot of the time people turn things and use labels like "racist" when race is just mentioned.

 

[Bcat]

I honestly don't see a problem with having a preference for a certain race.
It's just like having a preference for any other physical trait which there is nothing wrong with as long as you're not rude about it.

But outright refusing to date someone just because of their race and no other factors... that's a different story.
If someone were to refuse date you because of your race and nothing else- then you dodged a major bullet.

 

[Midoriya]

I don’t see it as racist, but as preferences. There’s actually not really any way this can be racist, imo... because if we’re talking about dating, this has to be the person you love. You obviously cannot force yourself to be with someone you’re not attracted to.


To be honest though, I prefer personality > appearance, so it’s not really an issue for me. There are people from other races I would be interested in, however, the problem with me is that my standards for a person’s personality are so high anyway, that I don’t think I’ll ever find someone for me because of them, which I’m fine with. In the end, if someone wants to be with me, they have to be worthy of being with me, since I’m a rare person. If that turns people off, then whatever. That’s their problem.

 

[Alienfish]

As long as they don't have any women/lgbtq+ denouncing culture or religion honestly, no. But yeah I agree with Spike, personality is def. first and looks second.

 

[IzzyShika]

It don't see it as racist because everyone has their own type of person they prefer to date, i'd count it as racist if they had a horrible reason (insults or whatever) for not dating "x type"

 

[Alienfish]

It don't see it as racist because everyone has their own type of person they prefer to date, i'd count it as racist if they had a horrible reason (insults or whatever) for not dating "x type"

Yeah, this too. I mean then everyone'd be racist if you just went on only for pref's really.

 

[Tao]

Yeah, it's not like one race just looks and acts one way. If "hispanic" is your preference, would you just dismiss a white person who could pass as one?

Not everybody in a race looks and acts one way, but there's physical features and personality traits that are more commonly found with specific races...Or are you going to tell me that if I showed you a Hispanic person, an African person and an Asian person, you wouldn't be able to tell me which one is which?

It's easier to say "I like Asians" than list a bunch of features that are common to that ethnicity. Likewise, that doesn't mean I wouldn't date other races, neither would I find all Asians attractive.

 

[dizzy bone]

I would say yes and no. There?s a lot of reasons to why someone might prefer dating one race to another, whether it because they grew up around them (environmental) or perhaps from past experience, idk. But I think those who say they would only date or have a certain preference to one race should evaluate why they think that way, or what the root of that bias is, because a lot of the time it?s not just ?I just think they are more attractive? (and that?s inherently kinda an issue). A lot of white men and women are presented with ?ideal standards? in the media, which is bound to transform the way we think about someone especially on a superficial level. I knew a few korean-american girls I went to high school with (in an American school in Korea) who have told me straight up they?d only date white guys because they think they are more attractive. They grew up watching Hollywood films with almost no representation of a leading Asian male or female. Despite living in Korea, surrounded by Asians, they would still only date a ?white guy?. Same with when people put on their online dating profile ?no fats, no Asians, no xyz blah blah blah?. This is the toxic mentality I don?t understand. Also, reference for race isn?t as simple as let?s say, having a preference for a hairstyle. If you date a girl with long hair, you probably won?t dump her just because she cuts it super short. But if you don?t find a certain eye shape/size attractive that is common within a race of people, you probably wouldn?t go for her straight away (let?s put personality aside for now). I don?t think having a preference is necessarily ?racist? but we live in a society that often puts down other races (even our own) if they don?t meet society?s made up beauty standards. I?m mainly talking about looks though, of course if you fall in love you probably fall in love with their personality and the whole package... So yeah my answer is yes and no.

 

[HappyTails]

As long as the guy treats me with respect and shares some of the same interests as me so we an at least have something to talk about, he can be rainbow colored for all I care. So no, I care less about race and more about respect and personality

 

[Mink777]

It's not racist. It's not like you can control attraction. However, I don't think you should single race out just like that. It's best to try it yourself before you pre-judge it.

 

[hamster]

Most of the time it's not. u cant help what ur attracted to. but like people can find other races undesirable for racist reasons

 

[nanpan]

I think it's fine to have your preferences.

Leaving out a whole race from your dating pool because of the color of their skin or culture is racist if you ask me though.

 

[dimicrow]

I don't think it's racist. It's cool to have a preference, as long as it's not "I don't like him BECAUSE he's _____, or I hate ____s." I'd date anyone skskdjkskss

 

[Loriii]

It doesn't matter. Sure, I have my own preferences but being on a specific race is the least thing that I'd worry about as long as the person is genuine and has good personality.