Sexual Orientation & Gender Identity Support Thread

fallenchaoskitten said:
You can still be trans and do/want those things. You don't have to be genderfluid just because even though you feel yourself as male, you enjoy the stereotypical gender norms of a women.

Pink was originally for boys and blue for girls. Blame Hitler for making them flip-flop. (... no, really)

Guys have long hair. A lot of hot guys have long hair I might add.
Fabio is the big old name for this iconic look. Jason Momoa for more modern take.
The hottest guy I have EVER went on a date with (like on a 10pt scale he was a 100. Idk how someone like him can just be real honestly. No I don't have a photo T^T) had long hair... he was a metalhead tho so that is sort of a given? #headbangers

Several cultures there are men who where skirts and dresses... though, usually they don't call them that BUT THAT IS WHAT THEY ARE. Lookin at you kilts. lol

Make-up is a new things modern cishet men are dipping their toes into. "If women can do it, so can I!" ... also, I know it is NOT the same thing as trans, but drag queens. Several of them are not trans and some are straight males at that. Fabulous makeup.

My uncle is pretty cishet male redneck. We talkin beer bellied, gun lovin with them all over the house, fishin all the time kind of guy... he will go get manny-peddies. He likes how it feels. Though, he will get clear on his nails and SOMETIMES colors on his toes.

ANYWAYS, my point is, you can still be trans/a guy if you do, want, act out of "societies norm" for a guy.
BUT, if later you feel that genderfuild just fits better for you, wear it. ^-^
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Not gonna lie, means a lot to get a positive response ;-; I want to do whatever I want to do, and it took a lot of courage to go out and buy pink clothes, cute sweaters and even a skirt (haven't dared to buy a dress yet, but I want to). I still see a LOT of negativity around transgender people not fully appearing masculine/feminine but I really haven't changed a bit in how I behave or think, I just like cute things too. Thank you for answering me and giving me amazing examples from around you how I can still be me and it wouldn't be too weird - I'll absolutely keep that close to heart! It's almost weird being assigned female at birth and then struggling with people looking down at me for liking cute things, almost ironic, but kinda my fault for working so hard to appear hyper-masculine for so many years and then switching it up on the dot lmao

(Also that hot guy sounds like a literal dream, WELL DONE)
 
Popping in to say what a wonderful thread.

I'm a demimale nonbinary person.
I came out about 4 years ago or more, and it's been a developing adventure, coming out a little later in life. I was what, 28? I'm 32 now.
There's a lot of soul searching and doubting myself, but at the end of the day I just want to be comfortable being and presenting as myself and my gender, whatever it feels like that day.
 
Would just like to start off by saying I'm gay but I unfortunately have to hide it from my family members due to some being religious and since I'm the only male in my family and the only sibling my parents, grandparents, all expect me too carry the name, have a wife, and have kids but that's not what I want. Eventually they will find out but I'm waiting until I'm 18 later this year just so that I feel more confident coming out knowing I'm an adult.
 
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Jared:3 said:
Would just like to start off by saying I'm gay but I unfortunately have to hide it from my family members due to some being religious and since I'm the only male in my family and the only sibling my parents, grandparents, all expect me too carry the name, have a wife, and have kids but that's not what I want. Eventually they will find out but I'm waiting until I'm 18 later this year just so that I'm more coming out knowing I'm an adult.
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I was gonna do that when I was 18 but not i'm 19 and here I am.
 
Lucky22 said:
Oh this seems cool! I'm a nonbinary lesbian myself i go by they\them pronouns and overall not lots of people would ever be supportive of me irl lol but that's okay in general already used to being the odd one out since like birth haha if anybody wants to chat that'd be epic!
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non binary lesbians are the most powerful
 
Hello! It’s quite late at night so I might end up updating this post when I’m a bit more articulate but I just really wanted to jump in here I guess.

I’m currently still living with my parents and am a pansexual ftm trans guy. My parents aren’t particularly supportive (it’s a very taboo thing in my house, and for them I’m not allowed to transition in pretty much any way, change my name, cut my hair, etc until I’ve moved out) so I look very much like a girl. it absolutely sucks. I have to live with being called my deadname on a daily basis, even my boyfriends slip up and refer to me as she/her occasionally (i know they mean well, and I’ve been with one for three years and the other six months).

Albeit being very assured in my FTM identity, I still love some typically very feminine things (“just being gay” as I chalk it up to). It’s become an odd thing, though, because although I feel like I love wearing makeup and floofy cosplay dresses it’s sort of... clashed? I almost am not sure if I actually still like those things due to the fact that I’m constantly afraid to be open about that for fear of the questions of “but I thought you were trans” “didn’t you want to be a boy” etc. I try to reason myself in that cis men can wear eyeliner and skirts and no one necessarily questions their gender identity as much (not an attempt to generalize, as that i have not experienced that personally it may very well just be how I feel) if they just identify as gay.

I very often feel like I’m just waiting for the ability to actually live my life. I’m afraid to meet new people and have to go through the whole “well actually” when I need to explain the fact that I am, indeed, a trans man.

I’m working as much as I can (quite a feat in the current times) and trying to save up to move out of my parents home, but until then... it’s hard. It’s difficult. At times it has felt impossible. Looking in the mirror and not seeing who you know you are is bewildering. Feeling constantly ashamed of your body and even the simplest curves in the shape of your face is downright frustrating. Trying to explain it to people is embarrassing.

I’m not sure how many people will actually end up reading through all of this (bless you if you have, I know it must be very stream-of-consciousness and possibly a bit confusing) but if you’re a young trans or gender non-conforming person, I want you to know that it’s not just you. You’re not alone. It’s normal to feel like you’re a contradiction sometimes. It’s normal to doubt yourself. It doesn’t mean you’re a “faker” or anything like that. You are who you are. People will almost definitely try to tell you who they think you are, but at the end of the day, the only person who can decide that is you.

If anyone needs anything, I’m around. I’ll listen. I’ll give you advice if I have it. Just pop me a PM—I’ve been through a lot of LGBTQ+ related stuff. And I’m always open to answering questions.
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cannedcommunism said:
I really feel you there. technically you could consider me a cis gay man but I don't see the point in excessive labels since I don't date anyways and things honestly might change. I understand that sometimes people want to make sense of their attraction/gender so labels may feel comfortable, but for me they've always felt constraining because there's almost always an exception. besides, not much of my identity is based around my attraction anymore so there's just no point.
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I get that. I always feel so dumb when I pull out multiple labels identify myself for fear of being pinned to the whole “snowflake” stereotype.

Part of the whole amalgamation of labels (I guess mine could technically be polyamorous pansexual genderqueer or non-conforming transgender man? which is a ridiculous mouthful for me, I’m fine with saying I’m trans and ending it at that if asked) is that I find a lot of cishet people don’t process the whole “that’s just who I am” thing. There needs to be a label for them. Their definition of a trans guy is one thing, and because I may deviate from that, I must be something else. It’s not always necessarily malicious, either. Maybe I’m struggling to communicate the concept at this particular point in time, but hopefully that’s at least somewhat understandable.
 
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Hi Guys! This may not be the most conventional place to share this, but currently I need your help. Here in Puerto Rico, government is trying to pass a bill that strips LGBTQ+ couples of their rights and acknowledges conversion therapy as the parents right. The government strategically did so in a times where most of us are at home, so we cannot protest. I would really appreciate it if you guys could look over at this petition, it could save a life. Thanks!

chng.it

¿Tienes un minuto para ayudar a Alcide Santana?

¡No al Nuevo Código Civil!
chng.it chng.it
 
necrofantasia said:
i honestly completely despise myself for realising i was straight after so long and wasn't as interested in women as i thought i was.
i feel like i'm not supposed to be in any way happy about it.
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Figuring out your sexuality is generally s very hard and confusing process . Don’t need to be so hard on yourself, its okay to realize who you are :)
 
I'm really nervous about this but okay...

Firstly, I've decided I'm asexual. I have social anxiety that mostly affects me talking to strangers in person. I also cannot imagine myself ever falling in love with another human being.
Did you notice I said "human being"? That's because of something I noticed about myself. I get obsessed over fictional characters who are usually not human. I've never been obsessed with a real person. Only fictional. Like Pokemon, Kirby, etc. I may actually be bisexual but apparently I'm not attracted to humans, so does it even matter? I've been too afraid to tell anyone this part because I think I sound insane.
 
I'm not sure where I lie in terms of gender but I've been going with non-binary she/her, they/them
I am somewhere on the asexual spectrum and I think I'm straight!

I have a boyfriend of 9 years, we tried being in a poly-amorous relationship with a woman but it didn't work out for many reasons and I realized I'm not very interested in women sexually.

When I discovered that I'm ace, it was hard on my bf especially since when we first started dating, my libido was different due to us being in high school (puberty and all that LOL). I still worry that I'm not enough for him and vice versa. However, we're powering through since we love each other greatly.
 
About three years ago I came out as bisexual to my moms. They were very accepting, which was a nice contrast from my intolerant rural area. More recently I realized pansexual describes me better and decided to stick with that.
 
  • I'm hella tired of 'acting' straight honestly. Like being in a straight relationship feels so draining in comparison to a queer or a homosexual one, because then you gotta deal with all the straights and cis who can be real ignorant, sexually conservative, unfun, and they feel safe confiding in you because they think you're straight so they can express their sometimes toxic opinions.

  • I high key feel like a lot of my queer friends don't believe I'm pansexual because I'm cis and not wildly flamboyant.
 
glad i found this thread! >< ( i’m a girl c: )

my parents are heavily against LGBTQ, so i’ll have to keep up the straight act. they’re expecting me to get married and give them grandchildren. i consider myself pansexual, since i have that mindset of ‘love who you love’. i’m currently dating two girls! i’ve never thought weird of poly relationships; it’s just having extra everything: “i love you” and hugs <3 i have a few friends who support me, which i’m very thankful for. however, i did have a hard time trying to let go of the ones who left me. i’m okay now though; i just need to find the right time to come out to my closeminded parents :’)


i also have this feeling where i want to be male, but still be classified as female; though i feel uncomfortable when i’m called either. a friend of mine said that i may be non-binary. i’m still confused and trying to sort these out!
 
Might as well pop in here, hey

We're a system that mostly identifies as nonbinary and presents as such collectively, though we all have differing genders and sexualities. A majority of us for gender are xenogender and for orientation are aspec and/or multispec (medusan too). Most of us also use microlabels individually as well as neopronouns (they/them gets confusing as a system).

We're pretty much one of those weird queers who over-analyzes their identity and uses terms that most people don't get and appears as fluffy, but we're pretty open about it and willing to discuss it provided people are polite
 
My parents are heavily supportive of LGBTQ+ and have raised me well regarding that : they want me to be happy and comfortable with my identity, on top of being a good person.

I've come to terms with being bisexual and being comfortable with it, on top of my boyfriend being bi himself. I've always been more conflicted over my gender identity though : I present myself as a cisgender woman, but I never felt any strong feelings towards my gender and who I really indentify as. I just couldn't ... care, to do so, maybe? I feel comfortable not being of a particular indentity, so I might be what they call ... 'nonbinary-fem', if that's correct? I'm pretty new to gender identity, ha.
 
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