The Internet's Worst Advice Column

[koopasta]

Go up to every politician and give them a hug. Start mass anarchy worldwide.

How do I cure my acne?

 

[honeyaura]

Easy: mayo! Just smear the good stuff in, and all those nutrients will shine through within a week! Oh and make sure it's light mayo.

How can I comb my hair without lifting my arms?

 

[Shellzilla_515]

Have someone else comb your hair. No need to move at all!

Should I make lemonade in winter when life gives me lemons?

 

[Dawnpiplup]

Sure, go for it.

How do I become the most popular girl in school?

 

[sleepydreepy]

Skip down the halls and sing fabulous from high school musical.

Should I study for my exam or stress clean my entire apartment?

 

[Zerous]

Both, stress clean while trying to recite your notes.

- - - Post Merge - - -

How much homework should I do a day?

 

[hotskittlss]

none! assert your dominance and make people you hate do it instead!!

my girlfriend really wants to play acnl with me,
but she has no money to buy a copy- i have no money either, what do we do?

 

[Korichi]

Let her move into your town while you both save up to get one! Send each other mail and gifts, play pranks on her by burying pitfall seeds all around her house, hide each other’s presents.. (etc.) I know it won’t be the same, but it’s something until she’s able to get a copy. ^^

I’m getting a little tired of having to walk my uncle’s dog (that I’m looking after for him) every day.. But she needs her exercise and doesn’t play longer than 5 minutes. What do I do?

 

[Dizzy]

Maybe find a fenced in park near you that you can let her off the lead in and run around with her for a few minutes and then go home rather then a long walk c:

I recently moved in with extended family and brought my cat with me. Their cat keeps stalking her and attacking her. We've given them collars with bells on them, which didn't work. We're getting tired of keeping them separated 24/7. What should I do?

 

[Shellzilla_515]

Perhaps allow them to take a stroll around the streets? I don't know, I never owned a cat, but I do see some that just relax and all that.

My washing machine broke down for the second time in a span of one year. What can I do?

 

[hotskittlss]

ask someone for help, call the repairman- maybe just get a new washing machine.
or you know, just kick it until it works lmao

I can't sleep :^(

 

[Shellzilla_515]

Drink warm milk. I'm sure it'll help you fall asleep. If not, try doing a few deep breaths before going to bed. Hope this helps!

How can I not make my feet wet from the rainy weather?

 

[honeyaura]

Rain boots would usually be the best option, but NOPE! Even better: food wrap. They're far more comfy.

I want to pass the exam, but don't feel like studying. What should I do?

 

[dedenne]

dont revise and fail all your exams. youre welcome


help meh i have too many headaches

 

[Shellzilla_515]

Dance your head to the beat of a song. Headache should either go away or get worse.

People say flowers smell good but why do I find them to be non-pleasant?

 

[Espurr]

Flowers are rather pickey about what noses can smell them. Maybe they just don't like you? Try asking a botanist!

My dragon scale seems to have run out of magic. How do I go about recharging it?

 

[StrayBluet]

oh, you can just use your standard unicorn horn charger.

Someone here has the same pfp as me, how should I destroy them?

 

[hotskittlss]

INITIATE THE SKELETON WAR

my family caught me sleeping late and now im really worried! help me construct a lie-

 

[Shellzilla_515]

I have insomnia. Also, I fear to have nightmares about Dotty giving me those red eyes.

My pillows hate me so much that my neck hurts. What can I do?

 

[MapleSilver]

Sit down with your pillows and ask them why they hate you. Even though you have been bitter enemies for as long as you can remember, see if you can come to a truce. Maybe even a mutual understanding.

My cat is being annoying. How do I make her stop?