i... honestly have no idea lol. there’s so much that i want to do or that i think i’d be able to do if i had more money that it’s hard to verbalize everything.
i don’t know if more time would mean there being more than 24 hours in a day or me having a longer lifespan or something, but the more money part would especially be beneficial for me. my parents and i aren’t living in poverty and are much more fortunate than so many others out there, but our financial situation definitely... isn’t great. we’ve recently come into some money which is amazing and i am so, so grateful for it, but we’re still not rich and we still have to be careful.
if i had more money, the first thing i would do is try to find a place to live. there’s a lot i need to do and learn before i’ll be able to move out and live independently, but just knowing that i have the finances to do it whenever i’m ready alone would make me feel so much better and less trapped. i’d just like to live in an apartment that doesn’t have mice or the occasional ant or cockroach crawling in, neighbours that are constantly setting fires and breaking rules, or my parents constantly yelling and crying and having emotional/mental breakdowns in it. my parents are negative, unpredictably ill-tempered, unstable (especially my mom
) people, and my mom’s temper and almost daily breakdowns and yelling fits make me feel unsafe and uncomfortable in my own home, so... definitely would move if i could lol. i’d also make sure that my new apartment allows cats so that my kitten could come with me, and i’d buy new furniture for my apartment as well.
i’d also drop out of high school immediately. i may wind up doing that regardless, but i’d feel a lot more secure if i had a bit more money to fall back on. i’m currently looking for work and will most definitely be pursuing my GED if i drop out, but it’s still a big decision. i’m so close to being done, but still too far and i’m just... so miserable. and i’m not even doing it for me.
i’d finally legally change my name to xara (i plan on doing this soon anyways), get a passport, and fly to las vegas. one of my closest online friends lives there, and i wanna meet them so bad. they taught me what a healthy friendship should look like, and i love them so much. they’ve been with me through some tough ****, and i think meeting them would be... awkward, knowing us lmao, but also amazing and a surreal experience. we’ve even talked about maybe potentially being roommates one day. i’d also love to fly to some of my other online friends and meet them as well (if they’re down, ofc). <33
i would no longer have to worry about the financial strain of taking my kitten to the vets, paying for things such as my phone and streaming services, etc. i’d also finally buy myself a new phone, as well as probably spend way too much money on things like squishmallows,
animal crossing amiibo cards, etc (as if i don’t already do that).