Technically a repost but I’m a bit sad that my best friend and I have stopped talking. It may sound childish on my end that she kind of forgot about my birthday and now today is our friendship anniversary of 8 years and we haven’t even spoken. I’ve been initiating the hangouts for the past couple of times and she seemed kind of quiet and stopped wanting to hang out longer and opted to go home early to “study” which I know she never really did judging by her online activity. I tried wishing her happy holidays on multiple occasions but the conversations seemed one sided and disinterested. I even tried texting her and she would always leave me on delivered while she was busy talking with her new friend (I joined their Discord server and I see their conversations in the general section). The only time my best friend ever talked to me nowadays was telling me how stressed she was or to teach her new friend Japanese. Her new friend seems really sweet and I’m happy for them, I just can’t help thinking that it’s my fault. I used to be able to talk to my best friend about everything, and she did do some questionable things in the past but she defended me in the past and made me feel that I was important in a hostile environment that was school. Maybe I’m just stuck in the past and that it’s time to move on. My best friend’s parents are also going through a rough divorce and she has been going to therapy. I tried to support her and listen the best way I could, but I feel like I failed as a friend.
This is def not your fault, you have made attempts multiple times to reach out to them, you listen when they talk to you, you seem like you genuinely care about her and her wellbeing. You saying her parents are going throu a divorce, not just a divorce but a rough one, she goes to therapy and that she's stressed. Due to all those stressors in her life could be the reason why she's been quiet, she may not know how to handle all that at once. Factors like that could lead to depressive/down/stressed behaviour. People being quiet and unresponsive to others is a common thing when someone is going throu it in life, it's draining, mentally and possibly emotionally. Online stuff serves as a distraction to stress. And as much as we want to help, we can't choose who the other person confides in, IF she is confiding to the other person. If she just has casual conversation with the other friend that that shows even more that they do make an effort to remain friends with you, even if it seems like it's only to vent.
I would say keep being persistent with talking to them. One of the last things that someone who is down needs is to loose a friend or someone to talk to. Loosing someone close to them just makes things worse. They will see that you've made the effort to talk multiple times, and hopefully when it'll all become much less stressful and more smooth. Once it does, they will see all those texts and know you do care for them. If you feel up to it, try to prompt them into talking about how they're feeling and tell them 'hey I know things suck now but you should know I care about you and you can tell me anything, I'll be here to listen'. Let them really know.
It is def not your fault.