Horse manure pie. All I'd have to do is get rushed to the hospital to get my stomach pumped and probably get the ecoli that I would probably have contracted treated.
Would you rather be the greatest singer in the world, or the greatest dancer in the world?
Would you rather have your Maid of Honor puke projectile vomit down the back of your dress mid-wedding, or be unable to contain the loudest fart of your life until right when you're supposed to say "I Do." -- and be looking deeply into the eyes of your beloved while letting it rip, hard.
Dude my question was awesome. You can't say "neither".
Also because I'm a preschool teacher I'd say... change rhymes to "punch you in the face". The kids would laugh, a lot.