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How are you feeling?

Good and way better than the past week for sure..

Idk what caused my headaches and tbh I don't care but it's gone, wooot.
 
annoyed i need to get food for tonight but bull crap horses heavy rain all day (umbrella and certain clothes doesnt really help here lol)
 
I'm feeling pretty blue right now. I feel like a nobody to be honest. I never stand out, I'm shy and feel like others only talk to me out of pity. I feel like everyday is the same as the last, I think I need a change of pace but I'm unsure where to begin.

Sorry if this was depressing, I don't want to bring anyone down but needed to get this off my chest.
 
Feeling.... scared? sad, lonely, and multiple other things.
My mind is torturing me with all of these thoughts, none of which are good.
I'm too scared to talk to anyone close to me about it, and since no one here personally knows me, they can't beat down on me.
When everyone see's me, all they think about is this happy little blonde, always smiling and cheering everyone around her up. But no one knows whats going on in her mind.Throughout the day she has little scenarios in her mind on how she could kill her self right then and there if she wanted to. its a little sadistic, but it is completely true. I am too scared to open up to anyone, and that is why I am here. To blow off steam? idk, to see if letting out my feelings would help at all? I guess I will just have to see. I am scared to die but I just don't see the point here anymore. I messed my life up, and too scared to come out and face it.
 
To add on the negativity, I've been not so well myself. Life really sucks lately, especially when you have no one to share experiences and such with.
 
Feeling.... scared? sad, lonely, and multiple other things.
My mind is torturing me with all of these thoughts, none of which are good.
I'm too scared to talk to anyone close to me about it, and since no one here personally knows me, they can't beat down on me.
When everyone see's me, all they think about is this happy little blonde, always smiling and cheering everyone around her up. But no one knows whats going on in her mind.

Hey MissPiggy. What you are going through right now sounds really tough. But as you say: no one will know what's going on in your mind unless you tell someone what's going on. You need someone to listen, because it's obvious that keeping this all in is eating at you. You're really strong for being able to manage this on your own, but you can't be stone forever. You should let someone help you, whether it's a friend, family member, teacher, a hotline, etc.

Throughout the day she has little scenarios in her mind on how she could kill her self right then and there if she wanted to. its a little sadistic, but it is completely true. I am too scared to open up to anyone, and that is why I am here.

You shouldn't be scared to open up. Things like this can happen, and do happen. You aren't the only person in the world that has gone through these struggles, and you shouldn't be lonely. There are a lot of people out there that could help you with what you are going through. You could try reaching out to your friends, find support groups, etc.

I am scared to die but I just don't see the point here anymore. I messed my life up, and too scared to come out and face it.

If your profile picture is any indicator of your age, then that can't be true now can it? Who wrote the book on what life is and isn't supposed to be? There is no rule book. No matter what religion you do or don't believe in, there are so many possibilities for life. There are so many things you can do! There is no one guide that says this is EXACTLY how it's supposed to be. If life isn't going the way you imagined, that's ok! Because sometimes that happens. Sometimes things don't go as planned and that's the beautiful thing about it. It's spontaneous; it's something you can mold and shape yourself. You can decide what you want to do. If there is a 'dead-end' then just create a new path for yourself!

I'm sorry you're feeling bad, and I really hope you feel better :) I hope TBT is able to provide you with some comfort.
 
alright, tired though.

i should probably go take a shower or whatnot though. and i need more coffee
 
Pretty happy rn.

I went for a jog today for the first time in a long time and felt surprising good. I also got a new job today.
 
Sad

My dog is in her kennel and whining really loudly. I would take her out, but I'm trying to eat and I can't trust her on her own. If she would just sit down beside me, I could leave her out, but she bothers the cats and walks away. Plus, my dad and sister are no where to be found and my mom isn't home yet. I just want to eat...
 
I'm so happy! I passed my test to skip a grade in math and I got a ti nspire cx cas calculator today! :D
 
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