If someone had a crush on you...

[Seastar]

No, it would probably make me uncomfortable and also I would never be able to feel the same way as them.

 

[nightglow]

I wouldn't want to know. It gets awkward very quick if you don't feel the same and they don't accept your nice decline. I ran into that problem before and I basically had to be mean to get them to stop pursing. I still feel bad about it even though it was over 15? years ago and we were kids at the time. And I know it hurt their feelings at the time. Hopefully they got over it.
I've seen the same thing happen to other people. Like it is good to be upfront and direct but it is a totally different thing if you are harassing someone to date you. And unfortunately, some can't tell the difference between persistence and harassing.

As of now, I am happily married so I don't have an interest in finding someone because I have someone already so I don't really care if they like me as long as they don't cause problems.

 

[ellarella]

i would want to know, unless it being unrequited could sour our relationship (ie. coworkers)

 

[ZeldaCrossing64]

I would. I'm not really good at 'reading' people, especially if they're being very vague or indirect. Of course, I think I'd have a hard time believing it at first, but I'd still want to know.

 

[skarmoury]

Yeah it's okay for me to know, but my reaction would honestly depend on the type of crush. If it's like the "I have a happy crush on you because I think you're cute" then it's totally fine, it actually makes me happy knowing someone thinks of me as cute LOL. But if it's the "I have a serious crush with you please go out with me" then it's a little... weird, I guess. But despite rejection, I feel I can have a good friendship with people who've had a crush on me (except if they start stalking and harassing me, that definitely crosses a lot of lines). I'm the type of person who will feel strong emotions one day, and then completely forget about it the next day. I'm going to be a little weird with serious crushes, but if the person is willing to move past it after a closure, then it's no problem with me.

This is so timely because the other day I just found out that one of my batchmates had (past tense? I think?) a crush on me. He's never talked or interacted with me before so I assume he just thought I was cute, and I was like heh I'm so cute. I soon forgot about it and then remembered again when this thread popped up. He's not bothering me anyway so I kind of didn't think much of it.

 

[Romaki]

No, it'd be uncomfortable and I am in a relationship. I think you'll know if feelings are mutual.

 

[LuchaSloth]

Knowing who has a crush on me would be a fantastic thing...yes. Especially since I am currently feeling rejected at the tail-end of a relationship, and don't really know where to turn. I know I don't want to be alone...but I also don't want to do the whole "looking for a partner" or "dating scene" thing. This past relationship fell into my lap in such a wonderful way, and always felt so natural and easy...right up to the point that it didn't. So...yes, knowing if anyone has a crush on me would be a very helpful thing indeed.

As for saying "you'll know if feelings are mutual"...this is really only accurate if the person has the confidence to speak to you in the first place. It is entirely possible to miss the best possible connection by simply never knowing that a person exists. I'm sure it happens every second of every day.

 

[arikins]

yes. i have body dysmporphia, which means i see myself in extreme negatives compared to how i am actually perceived. if someone finds me attractive enough to develop a crush, i think it would give me a lot of insight.

 

[amemome]

I think it depends on if I'm also interested in that person. If someone I'd rather not associate with had a crush on me, I would feel really bad about it.

 

[King koopa]

It depends for me. If it's some that I also have a crush on, sure, but if it's someone that I don't like/avoid interaction with, then I wouldn't know how to feel, and I'd probably just feel bad about the whole thing

 

[-Raven-]

Honestly, I’ve always been on the receiving end of crushes and that sounds nice but it means breaking a lot of hearts, and it sucks that I only had a real crush on one person (who lied to me about who he was so that completely ruined it). For me a crush would be like realising “wait, I really like this person” in that special way and make me shy and then I explore my feelings and feel my heart soar. Even with my partner that was like maybe starting and then I got the confession from them the same week as the “wait, I really like this person” feeling.

I guess not. It isn’t really nice knowing and feeling pressured because I’m going to end up turning someone down, I’ve recieved enough confessions and I want to be able to feel it and confess to someone genuine for a change ):

 

[apeisland]

...would you want to know?

I personally would. cause honestly I'm pretty willing to give people a chance to be my friend/partner/etc. and I want people to know that they can be very open and honest with me, they don't have to hide anything from me.

it's too bad I've never had anyone legitimately tell me that they liked me lol :,,,,,,,,,,)

I find it difficult to engage in romantic feelings and have trouble identifying them. When I know someone has a crush on me I get overwhelmed and start not being able to differenciate my feelings from what I think I am "supposed" to feel. It is as if I got obsessed with the idea of knowing My True Feelings and it makes me feel very disconnected from reality. So I'd rather not know. Not because I find it weird that a friend has certain feelings for me but because I get weird about *my* feelings. I prefer liking a person by myself, if that makes any sense. That way there is no pressure and don't feel this kind of detatchment from reality.

That is why I am not the person for dating apps either. I have been on tinder before and I was having trouble experiencing reality normally (if that makes any sense) because all interactions had already gone through the assumption of maybe liking each other. Horrible experience for me.

 

[~Kilza~]

lol at anybody having a crush on me as of writing this post.

Yes, I would like to know if that was the case. Obviously what would happen after that depends on who they are and how I feel about them.

 

[imorileo]

I think it really depends on how close I am with said person. I think I’d like to know if they were someone I wasn’t really close to because that’d be an ego boost lol. But if it were someone close to me who I have an established relationship with then I don’t think I’d want to know in fear of ruining my relationship with them!

 

[Disneyfangirl23]

Yes please it would make feel so much better

 

[Lady Timpani]

Please no, especially if they're coworkers.

I worked at a place where one of the shift managers obviously had a crush on me, and it was... so awkward. Also imo it's just a terrible idea to date a coworker, unless you work in a large enough place and they're in a different department and you never see each other.

Theoretically I guess I'd like to know, but when people have had crushes on me and I've known but not reciprocated it's always made me feel a little awkward and uncomfortable. But it's always been men so there's always been an extra layer of "why can't you like them" so that might be part of it.

 

[WriterofWritings]

This might sound bad, but honestly it depends on the person, who it is that would have a crush on me.
If I liked them? Absolutely! I would like to know if my feelings are reciprocated. But if it was someone whose feelings I didn't return, I don't know if I'd want to know.
Those situations can be so tough...​

 

[RemMomori]

For me it depends. I've had some bad experiences in the past with people supposedly 'liking' me. A guy in 6th grade said that he like me but I only saw him as a friend and I had no romantic feelings so I said no. He then proceeded to be all salty about it and joined in on the other people bullying me at the time. The thing about me is that I have no romantic feelings most of the time even towards people I think are attractive, it's like I have to get to know someone first before I can have any interest in dating them, so crushes could be challenging for me. If it's someone I know and have a connection with already I might give them a chance, but if it's someone I don't even know, it might be better for me to not know.

 

[Khaoticnoize187]

That would be pretty weird, like relationships be it platonic or romantic always ends pretty messy from what i noticed so forget it.

 

[Xara]

it depends on the situation and the person, tbh. i’ve had a handful of people tell me that they have a crush on me over the years, and the feeling has only been reciprocated for two or three of them. i‘m not somebody who develops crushes on people based on their looks or a handful of positive interactions; i can find people attractive and enjoy their personalities/my time with them without having a crush on them, but 99% of the time, i only develop a crush on someone after forming a friendship and bond with them, having several positive and fun interactions together, knowing that we’re compatible and they’re the kind of partner i’m looking for etc. a lot of my friendships and the people i’ve met have been online, so i don’t develop a crush unless i know that we click in-person as well, if that makes sense.

i feel like the majority of the people who’ve told me that they have a crush on me didn’t actually have a crush on me; they just wanted a relationship. i have never met any of them in-person, hadn’t had more than a handful of conversations (and none of them were beyond small talk) before they told me they had a crush on me, and a couple of them didn’t even know what i looked like, so i’m not really sure how a crush was formed.

i appreciate the person’s honesty when they tell me since i know it can take a lot of courage to tell someone you like them, but it just makes me feel a bit awkward and uncomfortable when i barely know the person and they barely know me. i never know how to let someone down gently, and i’m always worried that it’ll ruin any friendship that was/could be built.