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LGBTQA - Discussion and support.

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*Breathes in*


Well..I am unsure of my sexuality. I thought I was straight. But these days..I'm unsure. I mean I kinda "feel" something telling me. I can't explain it.

When you start to realise or debate your own sexuality it can be really difficult and really confusing, but you will work it out eventually. It takes time. The only advice I can give you is to discuss it with people you know and trust, and don't let anyone condemn or try to direct your feelings in their own way because it will make you feel worse about the whole situation.

If you feel like there is no one that will understand or you are around those who might disprove, most of us here are able and willing to try and support you as much as we can ^_^
 
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I don't know it anyone saw this, but it's the pink for Leelah thing and a follow up. I unfortunately didn't have any pink nail varnish, but the "Fix Society" bit tomorrow I can definitely do.
 
Just because one person wants to be something he isn't, doesn't mean he can be it. Even when people do a physical gender change they still really are the gender they are born as. Nothing can change that. (Of course there are exceptions such as intersexuals which are physically different.)

About conversion therapy. Forcing someone to change never will help. A person only can change when he wants to. But I've got no problem with parents trying to explain their child(ren) something they're convinced is wrong. That's your right as a parent. That's education, something parents are giving way too little nowadays, and the results are obvious everywhere. Of course the end decisions go to the person itself, and someone who doesn't want to listen, you just eventually have to leave alone and just let do what they want.

This boy, Josh, who wanted to be a girl and wanted to be called Leelah, remains what he physically is born as. The only reason people are calling him a girl is because he wanted to be one. And I don't think that's any reason to misuse the word.

I think they should put his real name on the grave, and he should be buried as a male, because those things are what he is. We're talking about real gender here, not sexual orientation or preference.

You cannot change who you physically are. The only thing that really can be changed is sexual orientation.

Now of course I find it saddening that a person commits suicide. But it's clear to me that he couldn't handle the fact that he was who he was. He hated his parents because of this, but obviously hated himself as well.
Leelah was a girl. Emotionally, mentally, she was a girl. She chose to be something she was, not something she wasn't. People have the right to FEEL something, and by saying that she should be buried with her birth name and a gender that WASN'T hers is essentially telling transgender people that they are not humans. They do not have the right to think or act a certain way. That is what you are saying in this post.
 
Leelah was a girl. Emotionally, mentally, she was a girl. She chose to be something she was, not something she wasn't. People have the right to FEEL something, and by saying that she should be buried with her birth name and a gender that WASN'T hers is essentially telling transgender people that they are not humans. They do not have the right to think or act a certain way. That is what you are saying in this post.

Purpl that was from last week let's not bring old **** back
 
Ugh there's a cute girl and I wanna ask her out but I'm pre sure she's straight
 
trans kid in minor crisis here, please please please PM for help

I've been out at my university since the moment I stepped foot on it. I email my professors before every quarter and explain that my name isn't accurate on the roll sheet, and I need them to use my correct (chosen) name and my pronouns. This has gone smoothly, for the most part.

I have one professor who just ruined that.

I've been passing supremely well, better than I ever have. I haven't started hormones so this has mostly been due to continuous effort. But my peers have been using "he" with me. Until my professor used my given name and called me "she" in class.

Here's the catch:

I am almost 100% certain that this happened because of a language-barrier caused misunderstanding.

Her English is incredibly limited. How do I explain to her that effectively outting me to my peers is literally dangerous for me, without being a jerk about it? I understand that she didn't mean to, but my peers have been emailed a list where my name reflects my birth/given name and gender assigned at birth. At the very very least I'm going to have to answer some very uncomfortable questions tomorrow morning.

You can't report a teacher for not using your name/pronouns at my University until you correct them twice. (And I wouldn't want to report her in this case anyway because again, her English is incredibly limited and this was definitely a misunderstanding but still one very unfortunate and potentially dangerous)
 
trans kid in minor crisis here, please please please PM for help

I've been out at my university since the moment I stepped foot on it. I email my professors before every quarter and explain that my name isn't accurate on the roll sheet, and I need them to use my correct (chosen) name and my pronouns. This has gone smoothly, for the most part.

I have one professor who just ruined that.

I've been passing supremely well, better than I ever have. I haven't started hormones so this has mostly been due to continuous effort. But my peers have been using "he" with me. Until my professor used my given name and called me "she" in class.

Here's the catch:

I am almost 100% certain that this happened because of a language-barrier caused misunderstanding.

Her English is incredibly limited. How do I explain to her that effectively outting me to my peers is literally dangerous for me, without being a jerk about it? I understand that she didn't mean to, but my peers have been emailed a list where my name reflects my birth/given name and gender assigned at birth. At the very very least I'm going to have to answer some very uncomfortable questions tomorrow morning.

You can't report a teacher for not using your name/pronouns at my University until you correct them twice. (And I wouldn't want to report her in this case anyway because again, her English is incredibly limited and this was definitely a misunderstanding but still one very unfortunate and potentially dangerous)

If you're already out what's the problem sorry i dont understand
 
If you're already out what's the problem sorry i dont understand

No you're right, sorry, that might've been fuzzy.

I'm not out in the sense that I go around shouting "I'M TRANSGENDER" at the top of my lungs, I'm out in the sense that I tell everyone I'm a guy and have everyone use he/his with me. I don't think I'd count as "stealth" because I'm sure I don't pass all the time, but up until my professor used my birth name and assigned pronouns, no one knew my birth name, and no one was necessarily aware that the wrong pronouns even applied.

I've been "outted" in the sense that now everyone knows that I don't use the name or pronouns I was assigned at birth, when before, they couldn't have known for sure.
 
No you're right, sorry, that might've been fuzzy.

I'm not out in the sense that I go around shouting "I'M TRANSGENDER" at the top of my lungs, I'm out in the sense that I tell everyone I'm a guy and have everyone use he/his with me. I don't think I'd count as "stealth" because I'm sure I don't pass all the time, but up until my professor used my birth name and assigned pronouns, no one knew my birth name, and no one was necessarily aware that the wrong pronouns even applied.

I've been "outted" in the sense that now everyone knows that I don't use the name or pronouns I was assigned at birth, when before, they couldn't have known for sure.

Sorry, question, where exactly are you going to college at? Is in California like your profile says?
 
Sorry, question, where exactly are you going to college at? Is in California like your profile says?

Yes! Really really really no offense, but I don't give out the exact university online. It's within the CSU system and it's in the Los Angeles area.
 
Yes! Really really really no offense, but I don't give out the exact university online. It's within the CSU system and it's in the Los Angeles area.

Nah fair enough that you wouldn't give it out.

Isn't the area known for being liberal though?

idk I don't think you have much to worry about like being attacked or anything
 
Nah fair enough that you wouldn't give it out.

Isn't the area known for being liberal though?

idk I don't think you have much to worry about like being attacked or anything

Oh no, you're right. And there's a really active trans group on campus, and there's this campus-wide initiative where all the bathrooms have posters in them that say like "If you think someone in here is trans leave them alone, don't forget to wash your hands before you go". Like I'm not ACTIVELY concerned for my safety..... but it still really sucks.

I'm mega privileged for my main problem to be a breech of confidence and potentially invasive questions, I completely get that; I just have to correct her and I'm not entirely sure how to go about doing that.

.... in light of recent events I kind of feel bad for posting anything.....
 
u shuld probably b careful if u do get outed to not use public restrooms, tho trans women r more at risk in bathrooms ive heard some horror stories abt trans men in bathrooms so be safe u know.

im out but i dont really have the stuff to pass atm so im probably going to sneak come clothes in when the next school year starts. everyone thinks i have a twin now tht i dont go by my birthname..lol
 
Oh no, you're right. And there's a really active trans group on campus, and there's this campus-wide initiative where all the bathrooms have posters in them that say like "If you think someone in here is trans leave them alone, don't forget to wash your hands before you go". Like I'm not ACTIVELY concerned for my safety..... but it still really sucks.

I'm mega privileged for my main problem to be a breech of confidence and potentially invasive questions, I completely get that; I just have to correct her and I'm not entirely sure how to go about doing that.

.... in light of recent events I kind of feel bad for posting anything.....

Don't feel bad! The only thing I was trying to figure out was whether being attacked was the concern
 
i think my school distrckt passed somethin abt like, if u idenitfy as male u can then use the dudes bathrooms
tbh i kinda wanna change privately and id prob feel more comfortabl in a male one but i think everyone would literally Freak the **** Out. still waitin on those ties from my friend tho

but ya be careful. and for ur prof i would talk to her after class and tell her ur actually a guy... say the document is wrong if she doesnt understand or if she does can try to tell her ur trans. or u can email her i guess
 
i think my school distrckt passed somethin abt like, if u idenitfy as male u can then use the dudes bathrooms
tbh i kinda wanna change privately and id prob feel more comfortabl in a male one but i think everyone would literally Freak the **** Out. still waitin on those ties from my friend tho

but ya be careful. and for ur prof i would talk to her after class and tell her ur actually a guy... say the document is wrong if she doesnt understand or if she does can try to tell her ur trans. or u can email her i guess

Maybe find someone to translate a quick message? If you're really worried about her not understanding, that is.
 
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