LGBTQA - Discussion and support.

[visibleghost]

So it's a mental thing?

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It's bellfreefourms;

I don't really get what you mean? You cannot know someone's gender by looking at their body though, so I guess..?

 

[gem83]

So is gender identity more of a mental thing though?

Basically.

 

[TangledBowties]

So it's a mental thing?

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It's bellfreefourms;

Gender is the state of being male or female (typically used with reference to social and cultural differences rather than biological ones).

While sex is based on your reproductive organs/functions.

 

[visibleghost]

Gender is the state of being male or female (typically used with reference to social and cultural differences rather than biological ones).

While sex is based on your reproductive organs/functions.

uh not really though
i mean
yeah gender is about male or female
but also about a ton of other gender identities................

 

[boujee]

Gender is such a complicated thing, my brain just shuts off(which is me referring to tumblr cause no one knows how to talk)
So it's more of a belief? Like a feeling of certainty?

 

[visibleghost]

Gender is such a complicated thing, my brain just shuts off(which is me referring to tumblr cause no one knows how to talk)
So it's more of a belief? Like a feeling of certainty?

I'd say that people generally just know their gender? It can be based on feelings, I guess. I think it's different for everyone ^^

 

[gem83]

Gender is such a complicated thing, my brain just shuts off(which is me referring to tumblr cause no one knows how to talk)
So it's more of a belief? Like a feeling of certainty?

I mean I guess you could say that... I don't think it's like "I, gem83, truly believe I'm genderfluid" it's more like this is just how I am it's how I was born and it's how I've always felt

 

[The Sundae]

I was going to post this on a different forums, but I don't feel like taking their "well, BACK IN MY DAY" shizz right now.

Putting it in a spoiler because it's honestly not a big deal or remotely interesting, but I want to get it off my chest anyway. It's also a little long too.

Spoiler

Okay, so I cut my hair even shorter than it was on Sunday. It's nothing like a pixie cut, but it's pretty short. Not even a few steps out of the salon, I already catch people giving me nasty glares and one woman actually violently pulled her kid away from me while I was passing by them to get to my car.

And when I showed up to class on Monday and Tuesday, my classmates kept giving me double-takes. They clearly knew who I was because I spoke up a few times in class during lecture. And apparently, this one guy was checking me out despite wearing the plainest of outfits - and he has never paid attention to me before until now. Oh yeah, and I was wearing a casual down jacket with a horribly faded grey T-shirt, SPORTY sweats, sneakers, and a cadet cap. The plainest and ugliest most beautiful and sexy of outfits.

Knowing how cisgender people think, I probably looked like a lesbian ((because no one believes that transmen exist)). So, I'm not sure why I'm getting the googly eyes.

As boring as the above text was, I guess I'm mostly irritated because it's a gentle reminder that transitioning is going to be a long road and I'm going to have to deal with shizz from other people during the process. And obviously it's going to be A LOT more than just "mean and suspicious looks" and that's what bothers me the most. I already got some lip from a few family members about it. Seriously if short hair is such a crime then GOD knows the kinds of reactions I'll get when I'm on hormones next year.

And it's not just anti-trans people that I don't have to look out for either, but I also have to look out for fake "trans-friendly" people as well (most of them are chasers or trying to one-up their social status by having a trans friend because they have SUCH an open mind).

Anyway, has anyone else on here been treated differently because of their too long/short hair, choice of clothing, etc.? Doesn't matter if trans or not, I'm curious about your experiences.

 

[Mimi Cheems]

I was going to post this on a different forums, but I don't feel like taking their "well, BACK IN MY DAY" shizz right now.

Putting it in a spoiler because it's honestly not a big deal or remotely interesting, but I want to get it off my chest anyway. It's also a little long too.

Spoiler

Okay, so I cut my hair even shorter than it was on Sunday. It's nothing like a pixie cut, but it's pretty short. Not even a few steps out of the salon, I already catch people giving me nasty glares and one woman actually violently pulled her kid away from me while I was passing by them to get to my car.

And when I showed up to class on Monday and Tuesday, my classmates kept giving me double-takes. They clearly knew who I was because I spoke up a few times in class during lecture. And apparently, this one guy was checking me out despite wearing the plainest of outfits - and he has never paid attention to me before until now. Oh yeah, and I was wearing a casual down jacket with a horribly faded grey T-shirt, SPORTY sweats, sneakers, and a cadet cap. The plainest and ugliest most beautiful and sexy of outfits.

Knowing how cisgender people think, I probably looked like a lesbian ((because no one believes that transmen exist)). So, I'm not sure why I'm getting the googly eyes.

As boring as the above text was, I guess I'm mostly irritated because it's a gentle reminder that transitioning is going to be a long road and I'm going to have to deal with shizz from other people during the process. And obviously it's going to be A LOT more than just "mean and suspicious looks" and that's what bothers me the most. I already got some lip from a few family members about it. Seriously if short hair is such a crime then GOD knows the kinds of reactions I'll get when I'm on hormones next year.

And it's not just anti-trans people that I don't have to look out for either, but I also have to look out for fake "trans-friendly" people as well (most of them are chasers or trying to one-up their social status by having a trans friend because they have SUCH an open mind).

Anyway, has anyone else on here been treated differently because of their too long/short hair, choice of clothing, etc.? Doesn't matter if trans or not, I'm curious about your experiences.

Yeeeeeeeeeees v_v I have extremely short hair and I'm a girl-- and my grandma gives me such a hard time for it-- she also thinks I need to go to a religious school because I'm pansexual and I need to 'get back in touch with God' =3=
Along with the way I dress, I'm a bit of a tomboy as it is, being raised around a lot of men who watched wrestling and played football all day-- I kind of inherited that and stuff. I dress in jeans, a baggy t-shirt and a hoodie... Nothing 'girly', and my grandma's like
"WHY DO YOU NEVER DRESS UP FOR YOUR FAMILY?!!?!?!?! WEAR DRESSES!!!!" OTL

 

[gem83]

Anyway, has anyone else on here been treated differently because of their too long/short hair, choice of clothing, etc.? Doesn't matter if trans or not, I'm curious about your experiences.

I've always dressed in a more "masculine" style and I cut all my hair off this year and the only people to give me hell for it were my parents. My mom constantly asks me if I'm a lesbian. And I live in the bible belt, so I'm surprised it's just them.

 

[boujee]

I mean I guess you could say that... I don't think it's like "I, gem83, truly believe I'm genderfluid" it's more like this is just how I am it's how I was born and it's how I've always felt

Mmmm. That's like a gray topic.
I can never really say I'm something for everyday I'm growing and what I'm liking constantly changes.
I thought I was straight but then I later grew a lack in men as time went by
I then believe I was bisexual but as time went by I was more attracted to the female sex
Then as time continue to go by, I really don't want to be in any type of relationship with neither sex(for people get on my nerves)
But I'm pretty sure my mindset will later change again as well

That's why I'm asking questions for people believe they know but it's going to later change anyways as you continue to grow.
I may have a strict preference though

 

[visibleghost]

I was going to post this on a different forums, but I don't feel like taking their "well, BACK IN MY DAY" shizz right now.

Putting it in a spoiler because it's honestly not a big deal or remotely interesting, but I want to get it off my chest anyway. It's also a little long too.

Spoiler

Okay, so I cut my hair even shorter than it was on Sunday. It's nothing like a pixie cut, but it's pretty short. Not even a few steps out of the salon, I already catch people giving me nasty glares and one woman actually violently pulled her kid away from me while I was passing by them to get to my car.

And when I showed up to class on Monday and Tuesday, my classmates kept giving me double-takes. They clearly knew who I was because I spoke up a few times in class during lecture. And apparently, this one guy was checking me out despite wearing the plainest of outfits - and he has never paid attention to me before until now. Oh yeah, and I was wearing a casual down jacket with a horribly faded grey T-shirt, SPORTY sweats, sneakers, and a cadet cap. The plainest and ugliest most beautiful and sexy of outfits.

Knowing how cisgender people think, I probably looked like a lesbian ((because no one believes that transmen exist)). So, I'm not sure why I'm getting the googly eyes.

As boring as the above text was, I guess I'm mostly irritated because it's a gentle reminder that transitioning is going to be a long road and I'm going to have to deal with shizz from other people during the process. And obviously it's going to be A LOT more than just "mean and suspicious looks" and that's what bothers me the most. I already got some lip from a few family members about it. Seriously if short hair is such a crime then GOD knows the kinds of reactions I'll get when I'm on hormones next year.

And it's not just anti-trans people that I don't have to look out for either, but I also have to look out for fake "trans-friendly" people as well (most of them are chasers or trying to one-up their social status by having a trans friend because they have SUCH an open mind).

Anyway, has anyone else on here been treated differently because of their too long/short hair, choice of clothing, etc.? Doesn't matter if trans or not, I'm curious about your experiences.

wow that sucks so much???? like honestly wtf is up with all those people.......

I cut my hair last year and I got a few weird looks, comments and stuff, but it wasn't even close to what you experienced.
Still, I have gotten treated differently but idk if it's because people think I'm a lesbian lmao. Homophobia isn't that big here? In school people are homophobic but it's not like anyone has confronted me about it.......,

 

[Mimi Cheems]

Well, the reason why I go by they/them, is because I'm not sure whether I'd consider myself male or female. I'm not neither... I'm just; confused. It's a struggle to be going through daily life questioning;; am I male or female? With everyone walking past me and immediately assuming I'm a he because of my short hair, really makes me second guess on my gender identity. Which is, obviously, the gender we identify ourselves as, or the gender we want to be identified/recognized as. The way I dress, to society, is another reason why I constantly inquire nearly every 5 seconds;; "Should I be a male?" and at the end of the day, it's difficult for me to cope with what society thinks I am, and what I think I am. I think, as a whole, could be either one. But I'm kind of forcing myself to pick one or the other.

 

[gem83]

Well, the reason why I go by they/them, is because I'm not sure whether I'd consider myself male or female. I'm not neither... I'm just; confused. It's a struggle to be going through daily life questioning;; am I male or female? With everyone walking past me and immediately assuming I'm a he because of my short hair, really makes me second guess on my gender identity. Which is, obviously, the gender we identify ourselves as, or the gender we want to be identified/recognized as. The way I dress, to society, is another reason why I constantly inquire nearly every 5 seconds;; "Should I be a male?" and at the end of the day, it's difficult for me to cope with what society thinks I am, and what I think I am. I think, as a whole, could be either one. But I'm kind of forcing myself to pick one or the other.

This a very good way to say it. This is exactly how I feel, too.

 

[Jarrad]

Well, the reason why I go by they/them, is because I'm not sure whether I'd consider myself male or female. I'm not neither... I'm just; confused. It's a struggle to be going through daily life questioning;; am I male or female? With everyone walking past me and immediately assuming I'm a he because of my short hair, really makes me second guess on my gender identity. Which is, obviously, the gender we identify ourselves as, or the gender we want to be identified/recognized as. The way I dress, to society, is another reason why I constantly inquire nearly every 5 seconds;; "Should I be a male?" and at the end of the day, it's difficult for me to cope with what society thinks I am, and what I think I am. I think, as a whole, could be either one. But I'm kind of forcing myself to pick one or the other.

after reading this I feel so glad to know what I am and what I identify as.

Good luck on your quest to find out who you truly are.

 

[Mimi Cheems]

after reading this I feel so glad to know what I am and what I identify as.

Good luck on your quest to find out who you truly are.

Thank you Jarrad c:

 

[boujee]

Well, the reason why I go by they/them, is because I'm not sure whether I'd consider myself male or female. I'm not neither... I'm just; confused. It's a struggle to be going through daily life questioning;; am I male or female? With everyone walking past me and immediately assuming I'm a he because of my short hair, really makes me second guess on my gender identity. Which is, obviously, the gender we identify ourselves as, or the gender we want to be identified/recognized as. The way I dress, to society, is another reason why I constantly inquire nearly every 5 seconds;; "Should I be a male?" and at the end of the day, it's difficult for me to cope with what society thinks I am, and what I think I am. I think, as a whole, could be either one. But I'm kind of forcing myself to pick one or the other.

This is what I was asking earlier because you seem more confuse than certain. I don't need a "what if" I need a "I am"
You said you're stuck in between because people say you have short hair so you're a boy, you have other people who have short hair and people don't think they're a boy, they just have short hair. This also goes towards what Sugilite was sayin with half-ass responses. If you don't know she don't know

 

[Hermione Granger]

Well, the reason why I go by they/them, is because I'm not sure whether I'd consider myself male or female. I'm not neither... I'm just; confused. It's a struggle to be going through daily life questioning;; am I male or female? With everyone walking past me and immediately assuming I'm a he because of my short hair, really makes me second guess on my gender identity. Which is, obviously, the gender we identify ourselves as, or the gender we want to be identified/recognized as. The way I dress, to society, is another reason why I constantly inquire nearly every 5 seconds;; "Should I be a male?" and at the end of the day, it's difficult for me to cope with what society thinks I am, and what I think I am. I think, as a whole, could be either one. But I'm kind of forcing myself to pick one or the other.

When I started cutting my hair short (pixie cut) a lot of people thought I was a lesbian. I even had a friend come up to me a year later and say that he initially thought I was a lesbian based on my haircut. Society will always label you somehow, even for the smallest things. I hope you find your happiness one day.

 

[Mimi Cheems]

This is what I was asking earlier because you seem more confuse than certain. I don't need a "what if" I need a "I am"
You said you're stuck in between because people say you have short hair so you're a boy, you have other people who have short hair and people don't think they're a boy, they just have short hair. This also goes towards what Sugilite was sayin with half-ass responses. If you don't know she don't know

I'm going to try to word this as best as I can. I sort of know who I am already, but I kind of don't. It's just that I currently feel comfortable as 'they' or 'them'. What I am? I'm really not totally sure. I'm leaning towards female, and even more now that my other personality who portrays himself as a male, has vanished completely from my mentality. He was the 'male' part of my mind, forcing me to be in a masculine mindset. Then there was another part who just wanted me to be me. A female. I was born like that, but then this 'personality' comes in and makes me very confused about who I really want to be. Sometimes, I'm all 'hell yeah let's wear dresses and do makeup and false nails'. Then, sometimes I'm like, 'woo football, lets watch wrestling, lets do cool things'

Not only that, but because I like boys AND girls, I feel like I have to be a male to like girls. My other personality thought that a lot too. He said I had to be a guy in order to like women, want to date them, etc. So that also really made me contemplate my gender identity. I'm starting to realize that I don't have to be a male to like girls, but it still certainly feels that way to me... Anyways, back on to what society thinks I am v.s what I personally think I am. Society looks at me as if I'm a boy, but what I truly think I am is just a female with masculine traits/tendencies... It's all very confusing XD

 

[boujee]

I'm going to try to word this as best as I can. I sort of know who I am already, but I kind of don't. It's just that I currently feel comfortable as 'they' or 'them'. What I am? I'm really not totally sure. I'm leaning towards female, and even more now that my other personality who portrays himself as a male, has vanished completely from my mentality. He was the 'male' part of my mind, forcing me to be in a masculine mindset. Then there was another part who just wanted me to be me. A female. I was born like that, but then this 'personality' comes in and makes me very confused about who I really want to be. Sometimes, I'm all 'hell yeah let's wear dresses and do makeup and false nails'. Then, sometimes I'm like, 'woo football, lets watch wrestling, lets do cool things'

Not only that, but because I like boys AND girls, I feel like I have to be a male to like girls. My other personality thought that a lot too. He said I had to be a guy in order to like women, want to date them, etc. So that also really made me contemplate my gender identity. I'm starting to realize that I don't have to be a male to like girls, but it still certainly feels that way to me... Anyways, back on to what society thinks I am v.s what I personally think I am. Society looks at me as if I'm a boy, but what I truly think I am is just a female with masculine traits/tendencies... It's all very confusing XD

That sense of dominance. Just be you lol.
You sound Demi.