The out of context quotes thread

[BakaRina]

"Sorry it took me so long to bail you out of jail."
"No it’s my fault, I shouldn’t’ve used my one phone call to prank call the police."

 

[-Blue-]

"Master Splinter, I'd say there's some kind of lesson here like, I don't know, "brains over bravery" or something?"
"I'd say the "something" part is most accurate."

 

[QueenCobra]

"I voted for cactus, but nobody cares what this old lesbian thinks." --Q from Impractical Jokers

 

[ZeldaCrossing64]

"Gimme your headset or I'm playing Friday Night Funkin' at full volume."
~Me trying to convince my brother to let me borrow his headset

 

[tessa grace]

"Bungee gum contains the properties of both rubber and gum"
-a pedo

 

[Holla]

"You Are a Sad, Strange Little Man."

 

[ZeldaCrossing64]

"Dogman screeched in fury since he had no breakfast. Li'l petey choked on his hair and died. Then 80-HD played CPR to wake Li'l Petey up. Li'l Petey woke up and Dogman killed Chief." (not canon obviously XD)

 

[BakaRina]

"How petty can you get?"
"I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about."

 

[Midoriya]

MapleSilver: "I don't care who the final boss of XC2 is because they're no match for that one ship."

Me: "and so, the adventurers could not defeat the ship. They couldn't find their way out. The ship gobbled them whole and went "nom nom nom nom, delicioso!" The ship's hunger was satisfied, and everything ended well. The end"

MapleSilver: "Unlike the final boss, the ship doesn't have an HP bar, and is therefore indestructible."

 

[BakaRina]

"How did none of you hear what I just said?'
"I’ve been zoned out for the past two and a half hours.'
"I got distracted about halfway through.'
"Ignoring you was a conscious decision."'

 

[-Mars-]

"Plus I mean lava? That's so unoriginal!"
"And afterwards let's throw them into the lava!"

 

[savanniebananie]

"in the game they gave him hips tho-"
"I feel like you just hit the gold mine for Zero two."
"i stole ur bf. im sorry man he gave me the sus face then drew a sus imposter on his hand. he was to sussy for me resist."

 

[Shellzilla_515]

"Look how happy Charles is about driving a competitive Ferrari again. He's just hopping around, lovely to see." - A comment from a Formula 1 video

 

[savanniebananie]

"so what yall doingggggg? answers not accepted: "ur mom" "ur dad" "ur [insert relative/pet] "nothing."

 

[-Mars-]

"By the way, you look nothing like your species profile picture"

 

[BakaRina]

".. .----. -- / ... --- .-. .-. -.-- [translation: I’M SORRY]"
"What's that?"
"Remorse code."
"I'm even angrier now."

 

[ZeldaCrossing64]

"YOU CAN BET YOUR *** THAT I'M MARRYING APOLLO! Or maybe Ankha, she seems to have a lot of... Endurance, as seen with Ankha Zo-
*insert angry Animalese noises*"

~Me to my Animal Crossing-obsessed online friend

 

[-Mars-]

"Sounds like my birthday party but without less tears"

 

[OtakuTrash]

"ARR, MATEYS! I REQUIRE FRIES"
-my first post

 

[Midoriya]

"Unpopular opinion, but I think "never gonna run around" arc was the best so far. There isn't much character development here, but the emotional display just feels so natural. Its like the viewers can actually relate to the character's emotions, especially "rick". He's definitely the best character."