The out of context quotes thread

[QueenCobra]

“Your subscription comes with access to artists ranging from Garth Brooks to Chris Gaines.”

 

[ZeldaCrossing64]

"Isn't drowning just falling, but in water?"

 

[-Blue-]

Did he ever bite you?
Sure enough did! Look at that baby! Go ahead, you can touch it!
Well, that's interesting. That there's a belly button.

 

[Hunter_Gr33n]

"OH GOD HOW CAN SHAVING CREAM BE SO FLAMMABLE"

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

“Now why don’t you two kiss?”
“Aren’t you straight?”
“Yes but I’m terrified of these people! They can control the weather!”

 

[Beanz]

*announcing like a wwe entrance*

“annnd the president of the united states of america is… JOE BIDEN!!”

*hums the pirates of the caribbean theme song afterwards*

 

[Hunter_Gr33n]

"Ok.
I'm going to talk to my dead cat."

 

[QueenCobra]

“I’ve seen better stories written by elementary school children and one of them was a single paragraph about Naruto fighting Ben 10.”

Post automatically merged: Jul 17, 2023

“…and R.I.P.-offs of hit Netflix shows like Weird Stuff and Octopus Match.”

 

[VanitasFan26]

"And I thought you were going to buy a stone to evolve yourself."

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

“Why don’t you cook us something, Tommy?”
“I’m six.”
“Hmmm yeah. Good point....”

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

“You remind me of me when I was a little boy!”
“Did she just say that she used to be a dude?”

 

[-Blue-]

Apparently its brewed using beans gathered from elephant dung.
Excuse me while I vomit.

 

[ZeldaCrossing64]

"I forgot about the free shield in the graveyard, please don't revoke my Zelda fan license."

 

[Midoriya]

"Welp, it looks like this Hoothoot has hooted... its last hoot."
"Bro, what the FARFETCH'D is wrong with you??? Some day you're going to maCHOKE on your words."
"Yeah right, only when tePIGS fly. Get real."
"Did anyone order Slowpoke Tail?"
"Get the **** out of here!"

 

[xSuperMario64x]

come town today, and try some corn

or we will sacrifice your newborn

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

“For someone made out of paper, she’s incredibly strong!”
“No, I think it more like you’re incredibly weak.”

 

[Hunter_Gr33n]

"I suspect he is preoccupied with the fact that he just had a bucket of water dumped on his head by the ghost of his dead grandmother, who also happens to be dressed like a clown."

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

“I’m too young to have a license, Brain. You drive. You’re a dog.”

 

[ZeldaCrossing64]

"You're telling me, this game isn't rigged!!!"

 

[xSuperMario64x]

*me scrolling through pinterest* "now I'm just imagining Link wearing light-up skechers"