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What's Bothering You?

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So last night I was in the shower when dinner got done. My Mom made hot dogs for everyone. (My Dad and older sister was out of town.) While I was in the shower, my older brother stole one of my hots dogs - no one cared - so later that night, I got hungry, and boiled two more. Tonight for dinner, my Mom made chicken and rice. I can't have it since I made hot dogs last night. I was told to have ramen while everyone else gets the chicken and rice. I'm not eating. Part because it's unfair and my Dad was being a really agressive jerk saying "Hey, f*****", "what KINDA ramen do you want?" practically screaming. So I just decided not to eat. It makes no sense because no one cared when my one of my hot dogs got stolen so why should they care when I boil more? I don't know. This is all stupid. And then my younger brother comes upstairs, tells me "Dad wants you to come downstairs." So I bring my cup with me, get a drink from the fridge, he's sitting at the kitchen table eating the chicken and rice and doesn't say anything. I see that there's two pieces of bread out with jelly, peanut butter, and ramen. I stated that I wasn't going to eat. Like I said part because he's being a jerk and it makes no sense. He rambles on saying how I act like I'm in charge and responsible for everyone else in the house. That I do what I want, et cetera. He's yelling and being agressive. So I end up going upstairs, on the landing, I basically, and I was calm all throughout this - trying hard to be. I simply, on the landing, when he can hear me, I can hear him, say that he's being an "agressive jerk" and that I don't do what I want and I mind my business. He ends up getting mad because I'm not in the same room as him talking. (Why would I want to be?) I just go upstairs. And I hear him STOMPING. Like, stomping up the stairs. He comes up and says something along the lines of "What did you call me?" and I say "an agressive jerk" and told him I've been nothing but calm and he's been everything but that. He ends up punching my arm, I spill my drink, and it goes all over the floor. I immediately start cleaning it up and I myself started rambling on about how earlier when he kicked the cat's water bowl, I cleaned it up. And he started getting mad over that. Apparently me cleaning it up for him (because he was busy talking and I wanted to be nice) was be being a "little ****" and a bunch of other things. I don't remember all what he said over all of this. It happened way too fast. All I know is I was confused and he was being a complete jerk. All of this while I was watching a movie. I paused my movie. One of the four cats was even on my lap sleeping. I got him off just to be yelled at and to decided not to eat. This reminds me of the time my Dad got mad over the fact that I wanted to sit in the backseat of the car (when he was driving me to an appointment) because 1) he was being a jerk and 2) I didn't want the sun in my face in the front seat. He got mad and stated how he's "not a taxi" and yelled at me to sit in the front seat. I told him "Why don't you throw another drink?" (or something like that because he did that yesterday). And he said, and I remember, these exact words, "Kill yourself". (In a serious tone. No joking.) Maybe I'm over-reacting. I don't know. Tonight's situation just gave me a headache. If it helps my Dad out any, my Mom did tell me to make a sandwich, ramen, or have cereal since my brother stole one of my hot dogs. But she also came up and told me while I was in the shower that hot dogs were done. Apparently everyone else thinks I wasn't responding to the "dinner calls". But they knew I was in the shower and I was literally yelling (but not agressively) "What?" "I'm in the shower." Y'know sighs And I am away from the family a lot anyways. I don't fit in. I don't like them. And they don't like me. That's just how it is. So I don't get where he got that I trying to "be responsible for everyone else" and "what you say, goes". My Mom even said that she'd let me microwave one if my Dad was here. (In case the power goes out from the microwave and he's the only one who knows how to fix it.) So what's the different between boiling and microwaving? I even, before boiling said that I'm going to boil some and she looked at me, went outside. Like she was fine with that. ugh

- - - Post Merge - - -

I'm also hungry coz I didn't eat at all today. ugh
 
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^Jesus f man please get better


Also I want to play Pearl so I can start leveling my Arceus to Lv 100 to trade to White when I get it, but I had to turn off Omega Ruby earlier because some dummy turned off the Wi-Fi switch while we were WTing and I had to turn the game off and back on. Well the prob is that I had a 26 hour avg playtime streak and I really want to keep that so I have to leave the game on for a while longer before I can play Pearl on my 3ds (blame it on my OCD).
I really wish my brother would let me borrow his black DS. Or better yet, I wish I knew where my DSi was!! I guess I coukd also play it on my old 3DS but that things on the verge of breaking so idk... I'm very troubled lol
 
I feel pain for you. (That was to Raskell)
My parents know that I can't handle more then one task at once without forgetting one, yet when we clean, my mom always adds on like I was doing the dishes and she said 'Can someone clean the drawers? ' Me being the overachiever I am, quietly took the job into mind. Then she states a few minutes later, "[little brother's name] needs a diaper change.' And I do that. Soon I forgot I was going to do the drawers, and my little sister not even doing a lot of work doesn't help either. And they have unrealistic goals. "Kindred(Not real name), you need to get better in math(and I'm trying my best but nobodies even giving me reminders for homework, just telling me to write it down when I don't even look through my agenda)." "Kindred, get up and do [chore] correctly.(I can't help if I didn't do I chore there style. I'm trying so hard to please them and they just dump more on my head)" But what annoys me the most: "You did a half fast job on (chore). To get on your phone right? Give me that thing," and it'll be on the charger while I'm doing something else. The only attention I feel like I ever get is negative or needed unless I get full A's and that's it. Another problem is they like to curse. I'm extremely sensitive to everything, physical to emotional so them telling me I'm 'worthless' or 'a little ******' hurts me a lot more then they think. The final problem is my little sister. I'm pretty sure she's narsassitic(she thinks I'm just a maid for her own use that can be bargained into doing what she wants) and feels like she can lie her way into anything and get away with it. And in her spare time, she's dramatic and tries to take everything I own (this phone, some old toys, my money, and a purse). But I try an optimistic view even as everyone tries to pry me open when I myself can't even figure that out. I was carrying a lot. Thanks for listening, I guess.
 
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One time I hosted a grab bag giveaway in acnl and one user only took 1 bag which contained a single lemon. I still think about it until this day haha...(im sorreh user)
I think my message was ?If life gives you lemons...? the other grab bags? contents were not that cheap, that I can assure.
 
I have tonsillitis AGAIN. I should see some specialist or something since I still felt tonsil/throat pain ever before I had this.
 
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Semi-confused about a webcomic which supposedly takes place in Korea but uses Japanese words...um...
Sora might mean sky in Japanese but it has a different meaning in Korean.
Should have named the character Haneul.
The author must be not Korean then [though all their works, 3-4 pieces, are all set in Korea with the males named after idols]
 
I'm trying to form an opinion on something but it feels like I've already done it WITHOUT fairly considering all the arguments and counter-arguments and now my opinion isn't based on reason and it's annoying me and I have to do something about it
 
I have so much to do even tho its summer and I keep procrastinating and its stressful and now I hate myself which gives me anxiety attacks and gjdiekdcnsksc I just wanna go back to school already
 
^^sameeeee

I really wish I had a dog.
I keep thinking of my neighbor's old dog. She was a teacup Yorkie and she was so awesome. I'm much more of a cat person but that little Yorkie was so fun to play with all the time. Of course after the incident with my neighbor I wasn't allowed to play with her again, and I guess they got rid of her because I haven't seen her outside at all in the last year. Now I really wish I had her because I miss her so much.
See I'm like a super clingy person because I don't ever get that much attention irl, and my cats absolutely hate that. Like right now both of my cats hate me because I don't leave them alone. If I had a dog they would love all the attention I gave them.

This is really starting to bother me...
 
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Just now my older brother, the one who stole the hot dog, cooks an entire pizza just for himself and my younger brother. Though I got raged at for boiling two hot dogs (AFTER ONE OF MY WERE STOLEN AND I WAS STILL HUNGRY). And I still, after napping, just now, do the cat litter boxes. I go outside to throw the cat litter out. My Mom and Dad is on the porch and I hear my Dad whisper "fukking cat litter" or "fukking (my name)". I was in a good mood before all this. But it ruined my mood ever since then. I haven't ate anything at all that day or today. 2 days no eatin' I have a therapist appoinment tomorrow mornin' and I don't even know if I'm going or if I'm going to say anything about what happened bc what's the point.
 
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**** everything. I have not been in a good mood in a couple of months. The majority of this generation of people are pathetic and useless. We better pray for the very few people trying to actually impact the human race in a good way.

I'm also sick of celebrities talking politics nonstop, more importantly, I'm sick of all the attention the celebrities are getting by talking about issues. Screw them all, and I don't give a crap about which side they are on. They only make matters worse.

Also on a less serious note, **** that Fortnite or backpack kid or whatever dance. I'm tired of seeing it nonstop as it's hard to avoid even when you are trying to avoid it. Trends are garbage and useless.
 
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It's 11:40pm and I feel like I should be going to bed but... pokemon is life :p

Eh I'll probably try to go to bed early tonight and just wake up at like 8am tomorrow, then it's straight back to level grinding and dex building :D

- - - Post Merge - - -


I feel ya friend
 
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