What's Bothering You?

[Beanz]

was recording myself talking for something and it reminded me of how much i hate, hate, HATE my own voice. mumbling and all lispy, can't believe i sound like that on a daily basis. i feel like my tongue is entirely too big for my mouth.

 

[Dunquixote]

Spoiler

I hope my best friend stops yelling at me (through chat on whatsapp) and stops telling me to drop it and stops with “you knew.” He knows how much I love him and the whole thing with love is blind, yet he chooses to ignore how much in pain i am and my only purpose and hope was to be more than a friend. he can tell me as many times as he wants to that i know how he feels, but he won’t listen to me (i repeat myself a lot, unintentionally and to make a point). He doesn’t want to hear it. He isn’t heartless but times like this makes me feel like he’s sometimes insensitive and doesn’t realize that the more he ignores my feelings and yells at me (I do deserve it without the threatening to stop talking me) the more I want to give up on life.At this point in my life, my pointless wish was all that kept me hanging on no matter had bad things get or how worthless and disposable. he tells me i’m not any of that and tells me to stop with that. but he doesn’t want to comfort me or be sympathetic even though he is the one that hurt me and pushed me to this point.he used to care more and stay to talk until i calmed down. he has been talking less to me even before this happened. he used to make more time for me and even stayed up to 4 am with me and helped distract me since I went to see Annabelle II with friends and it freaked me out so much. He cares so much for me and he says it is normal for friends do; none of my other friends (or former) seems to care about me or try to understand my mental health problems. It isn’t normal for me to have personal friends that try to help or that care about my well being. I know how he feels, yet I want to keep hoping he is hiding his feelings, even though he said he isn’t or testing me like he does sometimes. Not talking this out with him makes me feel invalid and in more despair.

 

[xSuperMario64x]

I just want a snow bunny collectible

 

[Mokuren]

My god I love my husband a lot but damn am I annoyed today by him

 

[jiny]

Spoiler

I hope my best friend stops yelling at me (through chat on whatsapp) and stops telling me to drop it and stops with “you knew.” He knows how much I love him and the whole thing with love is blind, yet he chooses to ignore how much in pain i am and my only purpose and hope was to be more than a friend. he can tell me as many times as he wants to that i know how he feels, but he won’t listen to me (i repeat myself a lot, unintentionally and to make a point). He doesn’t want to hear it. He isn’t heartless but times like this makes me feel like he’s sometimes insensitive and doesn’t realize that the more he ignores my feelings and yells at me (I do deserve it without the threatening to stop talking me) the more I want to give up on life.At this point in my life, my pointless wish was all that kept me hanging on no matter had bad things get or how worthless and disposable. he tells me i’m not any of that and tells me to stop with that. but he doesn’t want to comfort me or be sympathetic even though he is the one that hurt me and pushed me to this point.he used to care more and stay to talk until i calmed down. he has been talking less to me even before this happened. he used to make more time for me and even stayed up to 4 am with me and helped distract me since I went to see Annabelle II with friends and it freaked me out so much. He cares so much for me and he says it is normal for friends do; none of my other friends (or former) seems to care about me or try to understand my mental health problems. It isn’t normal for me to have personal friends that try to help or that care about my well being. I know how he feels, yet I want to keep hoping he is hiding his feelings, even though he said he isn’t or testing me like he does sometimes. Not talking this out with him makes me feel invalid and in more despair.

I know we don't talk but I just wanted to let you know I relate to you so hard right now ; (
if you ever wanna talk about it to someone whos going through a similar situation, my dms are always open <3

 

[Croconaw]

I wish that not having social media or not wanting it wasn't as taboo as it is. I also wish it wasn't so difficult to meet people with similar interests while not having social media. This means I'm basically limited to people I come across in real life. The people I know in real life are cool, but I feel like there's something more. I feel like I'm missing out on a lot by refusing to have social media. In the back of my mind, I'm thinking that by the time I get over myself for not wanting it, it'll be too late.

But social media is a cesspool. Everyone hides behind a screen and says **** to you they wouldn't dare say to your face. I don't like not being able to connect with people because everyone else is in such a different mindset. I don't care if I have hundreds of followers. I just want to talk to people with similar interests, but some people would see me as someone not worth their time if I don't have a social media account. I'm content being on this forum, but can't help but feel like I'm missing out by refusing to get with the times.

 

[Dunquixote]

I know we don't talk but I just wanted to let you know I relate to you so hard right now ; (
if you ever wanna talk about it to someone whos going through a similar situation, my dms are always open <3

thank you so much! same goes to you; you can message me too . very kind of you to offer . I hope things get better for you too and soon!

 

[jiny]

Spoiler

i genuinely feel like im going insane the whole story is so much to share, to keep it short i hung out w my ex boyfriend a week ago and feelings got involved ! ill just say that ! and we decided to stay friends even tho i still have a raging crush on him (crush sounds weird to describe it since we dated before; but that’s the best way to say it) and its so hard AJDKDJS like idk why im even doing this to myself like it’s embarrassing

 

[Aniko]

Too much humidity

 

[Seastar]

I really don't know what to do right now... I don't know if I'll ever feel the same.

 

[Dunquixote]

Spoiler

i genuinely feel like im going insane the whole story is so much to share, to keep it short i hung out w my ex boyfriend a week ago and feelings got involved ! ill just say that ! and we decided to stay friends even tho i still have a raging crush on him (crush sounds weird to describe it since we dated before; but that’s the best way to say it) and its so hard AJDKDJS like idk why im even doing this to myself like it’s embarrassing

I understand completely! Your situation does sound very similar to mine; my friend and I never dated and I’m nothing he’s interested . I think how you feel is very valid; I hope you hang in there and stay safe . Sending lots of good vibes and best wishes for things to get better and for you get what you want .

 

[themysterybidder]

I've been trying to get an appointment for my routine bloods and a B12 injection since early December, was told that all appointments had been booked up due to the holidays. So, I actually went to the surgery to try and book an appointment and was told her computer wasn't working to phone in. To be quite honest I don't think she could actually be bothered, if I had phoned in from outside she could have done it, but not face-to-face? Been trying and trying since they re-opened on Wednesday and still no luck. My temporary medication is coming to an end and I can't start my new medication until I've had my bloods checked. It is a nightmare.
Edit: Finally got an appointment for Monday morning, but now I can't get in touch with my Rhuematology Nurse, as I've got to inform her about my bloods!

 

[mogyay]

i've had 3 best friends for basically my entire life and as of about a month ago i am the only one without kids , i'm literally so happy for them all, i know for all of them it's been part of their future plans and dreams and i love their kids so much, they're all perfect ! but it's just increasingly clear i don't quite fit as well anymore (and perhaps haven't for a while), and that's ok , i'll love them forever and maybe when/if i have kids one day that will lift ! it just makes me think i need to expand my social circle a bit but i have no idea how , it's hard when you're no longer younger , feel like everyone already has their established groups

 

[. Rarity .]

Seizures are day ruinners :/ I woke up on the floor with a bruised/messed up nose on my off day. Agh.

 

[Soigne]

a lot of current workplace drama. i wish people could get along.

 

[Reginald Fairfield]

a lot of current workplace drama. i wish people could get along.

Some people I work with keep bringing up drama, or causing it to distract from what little they do there. It doesn't work.

 

[Bluelady]

I know that messing up is part of learning. However my anxiety keeps telling me that I’m going to get fired over my incompetence. In other words, lack of office experience. The fact that the department is short staffed doesn’t help with this pressure.

 

[Bruscoe]

I feel like when I return to work on Monday after my break is over, I'll be smacked in the face yet again with this afternoon route they're forcing me to cover in the middle of my run that makes me over 20 minutes late to the usual elementary school I drive for. I've previously brought up my frustrations about it earlier on in this thread, and I simply do not understand their reasoning behind wanting me to do it instead of someone else that is fully capable of doing it.

My run is specially designed for me to drive two separate buses - a normal 77-passenger for my high school, and a wheelchair bus for my elementary portion. In the afternoon after I'm done with my high school route, I've got to return to the garage to swap my bus, and I am legally required to spend about 15 minutes to check everything on both buses to make sure everything is working properly and safely. On a normal day, I'm given more than enough time to do this without rushing and drive to the elementary school before the students are let out there. However, this added route for a different elementary school they're forcing me to cover in between my usual routes does not work at all time-wise for my usual elementary route. By the time I return to the bus garage to swap, they're letting out the students at the school I've yet to go to. It takes about 15 minutes to check the two buses, and another 10 minutes to get to my usual school. By the time I get there, I'm running over 20 minutes late. This is unacceptable on all fronts, and I've told the dispatchers and my boss every single day about why this is a bad idea, and they keep turning a blind eye. The worst part? I don't get paid extra for this route I'm covering.

After a single day of doing this, I immediately complained to my boss and asked why they wouldn't give this to someone else. Their answer? "Those students need a consistent driver that they can expect daily." I ONLY DID THIS ROUTE FOR THE FIRST TIME ON DAY ONE. That statement left a very negative thought in my mind that what they really meant to say was, "You're being assigned this route for several months, deal with it." I'm not entirely sure if this is a coincidence or not, but this "assignment" was given to me literally a day after I was told that I did not get a promotion I applied for last month.

I don't mind subbing if it's an emergency and a last resort, but it really makes me angry that they have another driver doing the middle school portion of this other run, and after getting done with that route, they come back to the bus garage and sit in the lounge continuing to get paid until everyone else comes back. Way to go putting more of the workload and stress on me, bravo. The next time I do my bus swapping, I'm just going to take my sweet ol' time and not run and rush through it like what other drivers suggested. If the dispatchers ask me every day on the radio when I'll get to my usual elementary school, I'll simply give a sarcastic response while still getting my message across. Hopefully me showing up close to 30 minutes late daily is enough to make them change their minds.

I'm not backing down until this route gets assigned to someone else. If they refuse to compensate me for this unnecessary extra workload by the end of next week, I may even refuse to show up until they take this added route off. I'm that ticked about it.

 

[Dunquixote]

Seizures are day ruinners :/ I woke up on the floor with a bruised nose on my off day. Agh.

I hope you’re doing better now. Sending you a lot of good vibes. That’s so scary! I hope.

things still are the same about what is really hurting me, but not going to post about it this time. Instead, something with Genshin is really bothering me. I’m not expert on their culture or history (i need to read more and reread some books for a refresher), but now that I am in Sumeru, I see very obvious racism and disrespect to the cultures that inspired them with Sumeru. I’ve read some books on Iran & Persia that helped me get a fairly decently understanding and one not from the typical western imperialist/bully/police perspective. From my understanding, Persia and Arabs were/are very advanced and rich culturally. Their culture, language and history is very fascinating and beautiful to me. While the game does show some of the culture’s richness, I see stereotypes and I think overall Genshin makes them look very backwards and barbaric. i feel like they got lazy when and if thry did any research. most of the furniture does not impress me and the ones I like (mostly the shop and food and tea stalls, as well as the ones used in the cafes and taverns), aren’t obtainable. I hate the house designs (the leaves and the desert ones could be much better). there is more furniture for liyue and inazuma and fontaine (and really nice furniture) than there is if sumeru. the lack of diversity in the game bothers me too as well as how unappealing design wise the guy units look; and the fact there are significant more female units than guys. I still love the game but the racism really makes me mad. While they are much less racist with Fontaine, a foreigner not from fontaine for this current event made a comment that speaks a bit negatively of the “flowery language”. i’ve seen another npc make similar comment. using stereotypes negatively or positively just really bothers me.

 

[Violet Witch]

I just made a goodbye post to my followers on Tumblr after running a popular fashion blog for the better part of eight years or so. The reason for it is I have no interest in fashion anymore and the toxicity on Tumblr is just awful. It's worse than Reddit and Twitter combined which is probably down to younger generations being opinionated to the point where they're just straight up rude and can get away with it because they're not saying it to other people's faces. Oh well at least I can stick to my cosy Dreamlight Valley community on Instagram instead.