What's Bothering You?

I know that messing up is part of learning. However my anxiety keeps telling me that I’m going to get fired over my incompetence. In other words, lack of office experience. The fact that the department is short staffed doesn’t help with this pressure.
 
I feel like when I return to work on Monday after my break is over, I'll be smacked in the face yet again with this afternoon route they're forcing me to cover in the middle of my run that makes me over 20 minutes late to the usual elementary school I drive for. I've previously brought up my frustrations about it earlier on in this thread, and I simply do not understand their reasoning behind wanting me to do it instead of someone else that is fully capable of doing it.

My run is specially designed for me to drive two separate buses - a normal 77-passenger for my high school, and a wheelchair bus for my elementary portion. In the afternoon after I'm done with my high school route, I've got to return to the garage to swap my bus, and I am legally required to spend about 15 minutes to check everything on both buses to make sure everything is working properly and safely. On a normal day, I'm given more than enough time to do this without rushing and drive to the elementary school before the students are let out there. However, this added route for a different elementary school they're forcing me to cover in between my usual routes does not work at all time-wise for my usual elementary route. By the time I return to the bus garage to swap, they're letting out the students at the school I've yet to go to. It takes about 15 minutes to check the two buses, and another 10 minutes to get to my usual school. By the time I get there, I'm running over 20 minutes late. This is unacceptable on all fronts, and I've told the dispatchers and my boss every single day about why this is a bad idea, and they keep turning a blind eye. The worst part? I don't get paid extra for this route I'm covering.

After a single day of doing this, I immediately complained to my boss and asked why they wouldn't give this to someone else. Their answer? "Those students need a consistent driver that they can expect daily." I ONLY DID THIS ROUTE FOR THE FIRST TIME ON DAY ONE. That statement left a very negative thought in my mind that what they really meant to say was, "You're being assigned this route for several months, deal with it." I'm not entirely sure if this is a coincidence or not, but this "assignment" was given to me literally a day after I was told that I did not get a promotion I applied for last month.

I don't mind subbing if it's an emergency and a last resort, but it really makes me angry that they have another driver doing the middle school portion of this other run, and after getting done with that route, they come back to the bus garage and sit in the lounge continuing to get paid until everyone else comes back. Way to go putting more of the workload and stress on me, bravo. The next time I do my bus swapping, I'm just going to take my sweet ol' time and not run and rush through it like what other drivers suggested. If the dispatchers ask me every day on the radio when I'll get to my usual elementary school, I'll simply give a sarcastic response while still getting my message across. Hopefully me showing up close to 30 minutes late daily is enough to make them change their minds.

I'm not backing down until this route gets assigned to someone else. If they refuse to compensate me for this unnecessary extra workload by the end of next week, I may even refuse to show up until they take this added route off. I'm that ticked about it.
 
Seizures are day ruinners :/ I woke up on the floor with a bruised nose on my off day. Agh.
I hope you’re doing better now. Sending you a lot of good vibes. That’s so scary! I hope.

things still are the same about what is really hurting me, but not going to post about it this time. Instead, something with Genshin is really bothering me. I’m not expert on their culture or history (i need to read more and reread some books for a refresher), but now that I am in Sumeru, I see very obvious racism and disrespect to the cultures that inspired them with Sumeru. I’ve read some books on Iran & Persia that helped me get a fairly decently understanding and one not from the typical western imperialist/bully/police perspective. From my understanding, Persia and Arabs were/are very advanced and rich culturally. Their culture, language and history is very fascinating and beautiful to me. While the game does show some of the culture’s richness, I see stereotypes and I think overall Genshin makes them look very backwards and barbaric. i feel like they got lazy when and if thry did any research. most of the furniture does not impress me and the ones I like (mostly the shop and food and tea stalls, as well as the ones used in the cafes and taverns), aren’t obtainable. I hate the house designs (the leaves and the desert ones could be much better). there is more furniture for liyue and inazuma and fontaine (and really nice furniture) than there is if sumeru. the lack of diversity in the game bothers me too as well as how unappealing design wise the guy units look; and the fact there are significant more female units than guys. I still love the game but the racism really makes me mad. While they are much less racist with Fontaine, a foreigner not from fontaine for this current event made a comment that speaks a bit negatively of the “flowery language”. i’ve seen another npc make similar comment. using stereotypes negatively or positively just really bothers me.
 
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I just made a goodbye post to my followers on Tumblr after running a popular fashion blog for the better part of eight years or so. The reason for it is I have no interest in fashion anymore and the toxicity on Tumblr is just awful. It's worse than Reddit and Twitter combined which is probably down to younger generations being opinionated to the point where they're just straight up rude and can get away with it because they're not saying it to other people's faces. Oh well at least I can stick to my cosy Dreamlight Valley community on Instagram instead.
 
My upper jaw hurts so much. Whenever I move my mouth. It's so sore, and I'm stuck greeting people at work today.

My upper body is also very sore when I'm standing. I'm gonna be an absolute wreck today 🤕
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I hope you’re doing better now. Sending you a lot of good vibes. That’s so scary! I hope.

things still are the same about what is really hurting me, but not going to post about it this time. Instead, something with Genshin is really bothering me. I’m not expert on their culture or history (i need to read more and reread some books for a refresher), but now that I am in Sumeru, I see very obvious racism and disrespect to the cultures that inspired them with Sumeru. I’ve read some books on Iran & Persia that helped me get a fairly decently understanding and one not from the typical western imperialist/bully/police perspective. From my understanding, Persia and Arabs were/are very advanced and rich culturally. Their culture, language and history is very fascinating and beautiful to me. While the game does show some of the culture’s richness, I see stereotypes and I think overall Genshin makes them look very backwards and barbaric. i feel like they got lazy when and if thry did any research. most of the furniture does not impress me and the ones I like (mostly the shop and food and tea stalls, as well as the ones used in the cafes and taverns), aren’t obtainable. I hate the house designs (the leaves and the desert ones could be much better). there is more furniture for liyue and inazuma and fontaine (and really nice furniture) than there is if sumeru. the lack of diversity in the game bothers me too as well as how unappealing design wise the guy units look; and the fact there are significant more female units than guys. I still love the game but the racism really makes me mad. While they are much less racist with Fontaine, a foreigner not from fontaine for this current event made a comment that speaks a bit negatively of the “flowery language”. i’ve seen another npc make similar comment. using stereotypes negatively or positively just really bothers me.
Thanks Dun 😊 I'll hold those close
 
There was a winter weather advisory for my neck of the woods, yet we’ve gotten nothing but rain, not a single flake in sight! 😢 I am happy I don’t have to go out in it, at least.
 
My dad caught something at school and is sick, and whenever one of us gets sick, no matter how careful we try to be, it seems like we all end up with it sooner or later. orz Plus I'm supposed to have another followup with my doctor in a few days to make sure I'm still doing well on my medications, but if I'm sick I'm not gonna expose a whole waiting room to this, so it'll have to be either rescheduled or canceled, and mannn I just wanted to get it over with akfdlsksl;

also been feeling very sad for GoodTimesWithScar
I found out his cat Jellie passed away the other day ;; she was an older kitty than I realized, but it was clear how much he adored her and the poor guy already deals with enough as it is, I feel so sorry for him
in a way it's lovely that one of the Minecraft cats is modeled after her, though I know I'm always gonna feel a little sad whenever I come across a Minecraft Jellie.
 
I just remembered that I have something on my public records from when I was in middle school and it hasn't gone away. Stuff like that never does, but it's easy to overlook since I was so young. Still, it should've never made it's way on there.
 
Insurance. Dental stuff. Wisdom teeth are really bothering me, but my insurance won't cover a removal. I have Medicaid.. like.. shouldn't something like that be covered?! Insurance claims I'm not in enough pain yet, therefore.. my dentist won't refer me to a dental surgeon to get them extracted. -_- However,, this was about a year ago. Hoping now, since I can't eat, swallow, or drink, without feeling immense pain.. they'll cover a removal. There is also a hole in my gums where my wisdom tooth is... sigh
 
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