What's Bothering You?

I have had so many random meetings/calls/events to keep track of this week and I am struggling to keep up. I can be keeping on top of one aspect, then something new gets introduced and I'm completely thrown off again. My ADHD meds need to be changed so I've been waiting for an appointment with my doc but it's a slow process so for now i'm just struggling through with the help of my own self-discipline and self-taught coping mechanisms (spoiler alert: it's all a complete clusterfudge rn). It has all been a bit exhausting and a sad reminder of how much of a disaster soup my brain is when I'm not on my usual medication.
 
Poor me had a rude awaking, somebody thought it was a good idea to blast mi gente at 1am in the morning, followed by a cop siren...., not sure what happened but it's things like this that make me wish I wasn't born, raised, and probably will die in New York..
 
i've had a headache all day and just threw up in my mouth a little. it's probably because of heat exhaustion or something like that because of all the heat my area gets, but if not i hope i'm not getting sick or something. that would be horrible timing with school and all that jazz.
 
I’m sitting around in a panda onesie while watching zombie land saga because a baby bunny peed on me.
 
I've weighed the pros and cons of buying a Playstation dualshock 4 controller and I've decided I want one. I love the transparent crystal one so much but I'm so sad to realize it's sold out in the major gaming shops in my country. Jdksjdks just when I decided I really wanted it, why didn't I bother to check if it was in stock anywhere first 😭😭😭
 
Eventually had to throw away that bracelet, that one bead cracked a lot and a lot of other ones had scratches in them so yeah...sad cause I liked it :(
 
i have to go grocery shopping and i don’t want to; I definitely stayed up too late. Feeling extremely anxious ><. i hate being up when my dad gets ip. he talks way too loud and he doesn’t shut the bathroom door and i can hear him not wash his hands or wash them for less than two seconds and it bothers me.
 
Knowing that I'm still banned from playing staff online games is making me feel that I am losing interest in this site.

Almost as if I can't do anything to lift the ban, it makes me not in a good mood atm.
 
Oh I don’t feel very good today 😔 my stomach is upset and I’m not sure why. I feel so gross 😔

Edit to add: I love my dad, I really do, but God he gets on my nerves sometimes. Why on earth does he think I’ll agree with his sexist views??? Does he not realize that I’m a woman too?? He’ll say things like, “God women are just the worst they’re always taking advantage of men and trying to game the system,” and then stare at me as if I’ll agree???

Like. I know my mum was awful and did terrible things but I swear he frames his views of women as a whole off of her. Sometimes he’ll try and say that I’m not like that because I’m not one of those women but that doesn’t make me feel better or make me feel more inclined to agree with him?? Just makes me feel gross.
 
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Knowing that I'm still banned from playing staff online games is making me feel that I am losing interest in this site.

Almost as if I can't do anything to lift the ban, it makes me not in a good mood atm.
Well, you could try the contact the staff thread or pm a staff member and I'm sorry that happened .
 
You know that won't work, they won't listen.
Keep in mind they have things too. They have to answer mad questions, give out warnings, infractions and bans, and more. And if you asked, let's say Justin and he doesn't answer, try Jeremy, and if he doesn't answer, try obliva and so on.
 
I don't know, I feel like they'll keep true to what they said regardless of begging.
 
I had to leave work early today cause I was dealing with low blood sugar (I'm not diabetic but I do have hypoglycemia). I would've normally eaten in the morning before work but this morning was kinda crazy.

woke up at 8am to a repetitive tapping sound, and I figured out that apparently the door on my fridge wasn't sealed all the way shut (even though it looked like it was) so there was water everywhere inside the fridge form where the ice on the freezer melted. the tray below the freezer was filled with water and it took me about 20 minutes to get the water out without just dumping it everywhere (I still got quite a bit on the floor rip). so I had to deal with that. I also had a counseling telehealth appt at 9am (they connected me to some good resources for trans/nb people as well as LGBT groups).

so by the time I got tot work I was feeling really hungry, which is kinda odd cause I can normally go a while without eating in the morning. unfortunately if i wait too long to eat my blood sugar drops and I start to get really shaky and I feel light-headed, so I had to leave work an hour early to go eat. not too big of a deal but that's $8.70 I'm not gonna get back 🙃
 
I've applied for a job and got through the all the rounds, last meeting was last friday. There is only one other candidate left and they will have a meeting on monday and i feel like i have been waiting forever and I'm so afraid i might not get the job becausw the other person might be a better fit and i dont know and cant do anything anymore now to increase my chances. I'm such a control freak and the fact i don't have any control now is annoying me soo much aaahhh
 
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