What's Bothering You?

so i tried to tell my mom again how made i was about having my room painted and omg!!!!! she does not get me at all. for a second i was happier when she told me before i talked to her that we are having dinner from my favorite Mexican restaurant twice this month, but i told her this isn’t going to make me less mad about the painting and she doesn’t get why i am mad about having my room painted. i told her i don’t want strangers painting my room, i don’t want it done at all and when i said idc i was mad. the last part was dumb of me but i love when i tell how i feel it’s dismissed. not the first time this happened. like why am i so hard for people — family or friends to understand or my anxiety? i spell it out to them and they still don’t get it. also she should know that my room is my personal space and only place i feel comfortable. Either even the most obvious thing is hard to comprehend for them or they care more about what comes out of their mouth. i don’t ask for pity but i’d like to be understand and for mutual respect instead of being always the one dishing out compliments or being supportive as a friend or family member. And i am speaking in general about my life and how people i knew growing up have always treated me as well as my family how they treated me. just clarifying these are people I know physically and aren’t anyone here.
 
Last edited:
Dunquixote said:
so i tried to tell my mom again how made i was about having my room painted and omg!!!!! she does not get me at all. for a second i was happier when she told me before i talked to her that we are having dinner from my favorite Mexican restaurant twice this month, but i told her this isn’t going to make me less mad about the painting and she doesn’t get why i am mad about having my room painted. i told her i don’t want strangers painting my room, i don’t want it done at all and when i said idc i was mad. the last part was dumb of me but i love when i tell how i feel it’s dismissed. not the first time this happened. like why am i so hard for people — family or friends to understand or my anxiety? i spell it out to them and they still don’t get it. also she should know that my room is my personal space and only place i feel comfortable. Either even the most obvious thing is hard to comprehend for them or they care more about what comes out of their mouth. i don’t ask for pity but i’d like to be understand and for mutual respect instead of being always the one dishing out compliments or being supportive as a friend or family member. And i am speaking in general about my life and how people i knew growing up have always treated me as well as my family how they treated me. just clarifying these are people I know physically and aren’t anyone here.
Click to expand...
You've been posting about this situation for several days now and I've been debating whether or not it is worth responding. Seeing how things are developing maybe it is worth me weighing in.

I went through a similar situation last summer with my landlord. He decided he was replacing the doors and windows on my house and arranged this with the contractor before even telling me. He just sent me a letter with the details and the dates and that was that. I was annoyed about it, especially as I've indoor pets and I don't let anyone into my home unless we're very close friends or family, but ultimately it was his property and I had no say in the matter. If I'd had refused them entry it would have caused problems between him and the contractor. So begrudgingly I spent two days with four workmen in my house literally tearing holes into my walls. Likewise, in your situation, it's not your property and if the deal has already been arranged with the painters then that is that. You simply don't get further say - it sucks but it's just how life is sometimes. You can express that you are unhappy with it and that it is making you anxious, but once you have said something once it is fruitless to keep bringing it up. Right now it sounds like you're putting unnecessary strain on your relationship with your mother by continuing to try and further discussion on it instead of accepting that this is going to happen.
 
Help I'm stuck at work doing a 13 hour shift.....and the worst part is I have to come back in tomorrow as early as 5am

I sometimes wonder how different my life would have been if I had made better decisions during my college years...
 
my dad: "I PAY YOUR PHONE BILL AND CAR INSURANCE SO YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO TREAT ME BAD"
(even though he's the one who's constantly rude to us)

also my dad: "hey can you pay our water bill and cable/internet lol thanks"
 
xSuperMario64x said:
my dad: "I PAY YOUR PHONE BILL AND CAR INSURANCE SO YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO TREAT ME BAD"
(even though he's the one who's constantly rude to us)

also my dad: "hey can you pay our water bill and cable/internet lol thanks"
Click to expand...
lol sounds like my dad. He got very jealous that I spoke to my mum over the phone for maybe 3 minutes in total, then apparently he was ranting and raving saying "I've done a lot for her (I.e. me)...I've saved her a lot of money...Ive spent a lot of time doing stuff for her". Then he refused to answer my texts/calls for a day lol. I was like bruh I've done a lot for you by putting up with your BS over the years ffs 🙄

on another note, I'm sick of waking up in the middle of the night. Broken sleep sucks ://
 
sheilaa said:
^umm just cause someone pays for you doesn't mean they have an automatic right to be rude...your dad sounds nuts.
Click to expand...
he really is nuts smfh

like when you become a parent you understand that it's your responsibility to care for and raise your child. he treats it like a privlege and not a right like it should be. he uses it as an excuse to make everyone feel bad. it really sucks.
 
xSuperMario64x said:
he really is nuts smfh

like when you become a parent you understand that it's your responsibility to care for and raise your child. he treats it like a privlege and not a right like it should be. he uses it as an excuse to make everyone feel bad. it really sucks.
Click to expand...
yeah i can tell for a lot of reasons 😤

yeah exactly, it's like parents think they are entitled to treat their kids like they want just cause they care and pay for them... you're dad sounds like a loser tbh.. and yeah.
 
Vrisnem said:
You've been posting about this situation for several days now and I've been debating whether or not it is worth responding. Seeing how things are developing maybe it is worth me weighing in.

I went through a similar situation last summer with my landlord. He decided he was replacing the doors and windows on my house and arranged this with the contractor before even telling me. He just sent me a letter with the details and the dates and that was that. I was annoyed about it, especially as I've indoor pets and I don't let anyone into my home unless we're very close friends or family, but ultimately it was his property and I had no say in the matter. If I'd had refused them entry it would have caused problems between him and the contractor. So begrudgingly I spent two days with four workmen in my house literally tearing holes into my walls. Likewise, in your situation, it's not your property and if the deal has already been arranged with the painters then that is that. You simply don't get further say - it sucks but it's just how life is sometimes. You can express that you are unhappy with it and that it is making you anxious, but once you have said something once it is fruitless to keep bringing it up. Right now it sounds like you're putting unnecessary strain on your relationship with your mother by continuing to try and further discussion on it instead of accepting that this is going to happen.
Click to expand...

Thanks, Vris. You’re right. I appreciate you telling me this. My counselor told me to try talking to her even though I was convinced she wouldn’t listen and that didn’t go well. My mom is the only person I get along with in my family so you’re definitely right that I shouldn’t strain the relationship. I guess the painting is not really worth this strain as much as the moving is and that too I need to eventually accept or somehow get money, a job and get rid of all my mental issues. I think maybe in time i’ll get over the moving since the longer this pandemic goes on and I not see my friends, I wonder if I really belonged with them anyways. I don’t get along with two people that attend the parties anymore and even the friends I thought were good to me, I still question whether I fit in or not. So hard to stay optimistic and like myself though because of this. i’ll do some more thinking and try to take deep breaths and figure out other ways to cope.

Thanks again vris. Sorry if I annoyed you or anyone. I post it here to vent. I could talk to my online friends but they’re all going through worse stuff than me so I really don’t want to trouble them.
 
Dunquixote said:
Thanks, Vris. You’re right. I appreciate you telling me this. My counselor told me to try talking to her even though I was convinced she wouldn’t listen and that didn’t go well. My mom is the only person I get along with in my family so you’re definitely right that I shouldn’t strain the relationship. I guess the painting is not really worth this strain as much as the moving is and that too I need to eventually accept or somehow get money, a job and get rid of all my mental issues. I think maybe in time i’ll get over the moving since the longer this pandemic goes on and I not see my friends, I wonder if I really belonged with them anyways. I don’t get along with two people that attend the parties anymore and even the friends I thought were good to me, I still question whether I fit in or not. So hard to stay optimistic and like myself though because of this. i’ll do some more thinking and try to take deep breaths and figure out other ways to cope.

Thanks again vris. Sorry if I annoyed you or anyone. I post it here to vent. I could talk to my online friends but they’re all going through worse stuff than me so I really don’t want to trouble them.
Click to expand...
Talking can only achieve so much. On the first attempt, great, it might go well, but if it doesn't and you continue to try and change the other person's mind they will eventually just put up a wall against you. Upside is the painting won't take long, a couple of days max if they need to do several coats, and then you can move on from it. Easier said than executed, I know, but once it's done it's done.

I think the pandemic has had a lot of people questioning where they really stand with their friends. If things have shifted, were you really a good match for each other anyway? Will the move take you to a new place? You might find you make friends you fit in with better in the new location. Whether or not that does happen, don't define your self-worth by whether or not others like you. Sometimes you're just in the wrong place and among the wrong people. The younger you are the more likely that is to be true.

You're not annoying, don't worry! I don't like to see people struggling and after a couple of days of seeing you trying to deal with this situation felt like I had to say something. I'm glad you didn't take it negatively!

Your problems are just as valid as anyone else's. My inbox is always open if you want to chat.
 
I couldn’t sleep until four in the morning because my brain kept ruminating on my past relationship. Yesterday was pretty good up until that point, so I’m not sure what happened.
 
I'm just barely scraping by financially and my bird is now showing signs of crop stasis/impaction. He is regurgitating all of his seeds and is visibly unwell. It came on so suddenly. I am taking him to the emergency vet but idk how I'm going to afford it.
 
hestu said:
I'm just barely scraping by financially and my bird is now showing signs of crop stasis/impaction. He is regurgitating all of his seeds and is visibly unwell. It came on so suddenly. I am taking him to the emergency vet but idk how I'm going to afford it.
Click to expand...
This is awful, I'm so sorry - I hope your little bird friend gets better. Unexpected vet visits are awful, I hope you are doing ok 💚
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

Chronos314_XD
Do You Enjoy the Holidays?
2
Replies
27
Views
402
Dim
Dim
Suguri
How do you maintain a schedule?
Replies
11
Views
212
Corrie
Corrie
Chronos314_XD
Web Series Thread
Replies
6
Views
340
axaniao
axaniao
Alolan_Apples
Worst Fanfiction you ever read?
Replies
17
Views
399
QueenCobra
QueenCobra
Airysuit
  • Poll
What kind of breakfast do you eat?
2 3 4
Replies
65
Views
681
Bob Zombie
Bob Zombie
Back
Top