What's Bothering You?

Ok so I managed to evolve my Slowpoke in PoGo for research but idfk how I will catch 30 ghost and dark pokémon respectively, they are hardly out this time of the year 😂
 
I keep seeing so many nye posts on social media and it just makes me cringe. It makes me wonder why people think nye is so special and why they feel the need to blast it on social media. I just don't find it that exciting.

also I've spent an excessive amount of money over the past few weeks and I may run out of money 🙃

Every holiday is just an excuse for people to party. I try to avoid social media during these times since seeing pictures of families having a fun time makes me feel lonely lol. Although the main reason for me on why I hate NYE is that it the loud noises spook a lot of stray animals.
 
At this point I don't care about New Years. 2021 was a year of manipulation where it plays with your emotions thinking that things were going to get better, but then it seemed to repeat the same events that happened in 2020 but worse. 2022 to me is going to be another year of survival. I don't care what that year throws at me, but I am just going to suck it up and deal with it. Its hard to be positive these days, but that's just how it is these days.
 
watching the masked singer, and i'm obsessed with how they manage to gender stuff like a mushroom and a chandelier. always thought it would add more to the mystery if they put some of the men and women in costumes gendered the opposite way tbh.
 
I'm frustrated by the fact I've been trying to get red star fragments from the latest event for almost 3 weeks now. Despite my best efforts, I haven't gotten a single PM/reply to my thread and any time I've made an offer for silver bells when somebody offers enough of them, almost instantly another person comes in and asks for a snow bunny or snowflake wand and I have no shot at that point. Given how time sensitive this is, it feels completely hopeless to even get 1 fragment, let alone 3. The event ends later today, the shop likely closes a week or so from now, and soon I'll be unable to get the full row of 2022 red star fragments I was hoping to get unless things change drastically. It really sucks since the red star fragments are my favorite collectible and I've longed for a row of them that I can use as my top row while having a variety of collectibles to use for the bottom row.

This is very much just "tip of the iceberg" type ****, though, since there's a lot more driving the more negative thoughts and emotions I've felt recently than just this. Like it bothers me that I'm letting dumb internet JPGs get me down. I definitely feel like I've gotten away from who I am and who I want to be and let too many things build up and snowball over me lately and it sucks. I have a plan in place to try and begin fixing this, I just need this event to be completely over with so I can move it forward.

Also, none of this is intended to be any sort of appeal to emotion/guilt-tripping/pandering tactic to get the fragments. This is just pure frustration and venting about it to try and feel better. I only want people to help me because they want to help, not because they feel they have to. But now I won't be able to help but feel like if anybody does step forward and helps me now, it'll be solely because of this post. ):
 
How do you not feel dread over your own existence? Like seriously, how do you stop? I can't wait to be older to get that "your 20s are the worst" part over with.
 
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Yup. I took a COVID test today and... It's positive. In my state I guess vaccinated people only have to quarantine for 5 days? So I'll be back to work on Wednesday :^|
Would've been nice to have 10-14 days off, but it's whatever T^T
 
Yeah, if our "temporary" manager could start acting a bit more like an actual manager and a bit less like a micromanager, that would be great. I swear they have a comment for every single thing I do. I like this job, I really do, even if it's just a cashier and stocker at a grocery store. But they are really making me start to hate it. Good thing they're just temporary, right? ...Except they aren't. They were brought in from another store to cover a manager who was out for a couple weeks, but I guess the store liked them enough here that despite the fact that the other manager came back a while ago, they're now working here all week every week and that doesn't seem to be changing any time soon. It's to the point where them even so much as glancing in my direction immediately makes me nervous as I expect yet another comment to be coming my way shortly after. I've been here for over a year and a half now and they're the only manager that has had any issue with me, let alone to this level.

Sorry, just had to get that off my chest. I used to come home from work feeling calm and relaxed, now I'm coming home feeling stressed. And for someone whose mental health hasn't exactly been the greatest lately either, this kind of stuff most certainly is not helping in the slightest.
 
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^interesting...

also lol @ music/culture summarizing texts in tabloid/newspapers, mostly cause they only include like boomer/pc stuff rather than the actual big stuff... tragedy.
 
my dad's logic is basically this: "you won't do this one miniscule thing for me and allow me to control you, so I'm not gonna give you this basic necessity (like food or a drink) lol". never heard of someone refusing someone else's needs because they wouldn't let themselves be controlled, especially not someone who's caring for an invalid like my mom.


on a slightly more light-hearted note I just found out that the Webkinz team did in fact make a Silver Fox pet but it was released in Aug 2020 (after they stopped making plushies) so no Webkinz plush exists of it. it's bad enough I have the hardest time finding a silver fox plush in general, anywhere on the internet, but now the Webkinz people are essentially saying "haha we made a silver fox but you can't have the plush of it so tough luck" 🙃


edit: okay so I found one but it's from Amazon Deutschland (Germany) and they do not ship to the US so I guess I won't be getting one rn :,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,)
but look how precious this boy is!!! I would protect him w my life!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Google and its webp images pormotion ****. Like come on no one uses it except you and it's really annoying having to save it and then save again in another format because you can't just keep it : (
 
i’m so tired of having nightmares every night dude. like literally every night i have at least one (usually more) disturbing/upsetting/disorienting dream and i’ve just come to dread going to sleep.
also this might be tmi but i’ve been waking up way more often than usual to pee during the night and having random weird pains. i’m kind of worried that there’s something wrong with me but i’m afraid of going to the doctor. ughhh god i hate anxiety sm
yea i’m gonna have to go eventually but i’m scared that they’re gonna tell me something awful.
 
When someone insists they want to be a part of something, and makes a big fuss, and you plan for them to attend and then they cancel like two hours before, not because they are sick or something but because they magically want to do something else all of a sudden.
Like, that would have been nice to know about yesterday when buying stuff for this.... 😠 Like, this is why we normally don't host things because of this very thing that happens... 🙄 Good thing tickets weren't involved like they were going to be..
 
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