my grandpa passed away just this morning, probably less than an hour ago.
i've never been close to him. he's been awful to me and my siblings. i'm not sure if i'm mourning his death or if i'm mourning the fact that i will never, no matter what, have a loving pair of grandparents like most people do.
i'm not sure what to think. my dad told me and my chest got very warm like it does during panic attacks but it dissipated almost instantly. i don't feel like crying, i don't feel like seeing him or even going to his funeral but im afraid i'm going to regret it.
hmm. being an adult kind of sucks. i can't cry or whine my way out of this. it's time to make a decision.