Don't feel like that, it's hard, but give it your all! don't feel pressured, if you are being read scum prove them wrong.
If you want to go, don't go on a suicide mission, and ask for a replacement. But I would really like it if you stay, the bigger this community gets the better.
I'm leaning scum with you for my logic to make sense, but nothing is set and that could change. I will respect your decision, but one substantial post per day cycle is enough to keep going. It's also okay to be wrong, I'm wrong most of the time.
How can we help you have a better time? I understand the attacking people is hard, but sometimes that's the only way to get reactions. Go on your own accord if your really want, but please don't do it like this. After D1 it gets more clear how the targets are, and it won't be as random.