Plot for webcomic progression / critique thread.

[biibii]

This is basically gonna be sort of like a script for a movie in a way. Please post your opinions and critique below for my future webcomic, Flipped Over it mainly focuses on teenage like struggles to communicate, evil dragon ladies, stereotypes, and other dumb stuff. To find out more click on this linky:
http://www.belltreeforums.com/showthread.php?294553-Paying-for-help-illustrating-a-webcomic

There are 4 main charas, Lisi (debating on changing name to Mary Elizabeth), William, Stella, and Hank. There are other two side characters, Emily, and April + aaaaaaaaaallllllll of Verberra's Zombies. AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST ONE ANTAGONIST, VERBERRA.

(Still Hiring Illustrator!!!)






Scene One (introduction):

L: WAKE UP WILLIAM, WE HAVE THE FIELD TRIP TO THE ARCHEOLOGICAL DISCOVERY CENTER TODAY AND WE ARE SOOOOOOOOOOOO LATE! /checks clock, 6:57/OHMYGOD ITS 7 OHMYGOD OHMY-
W: SHUT UP YOU FLATCHESTED IDIOT, IM ALMOST READY, BESIDES WE HAVE TO GET THERE AT 8./pulls shirt off to reveal p ripped abs/
L: You know you are the one that failed thE ONE LANGUAGE YOU SPEAK. THEREFORE, YOU ARE AND IDIOT AND A HYPOCRITE. /slams door + storms off/
/both siblings shown getting of a Private school school bus/
L: Hey Annavay, I wonder if they'll show us a portion of the Rosetta stone? I'd like to study the burial systems of ancient egypt.
AV: wtf lisi i cannot comprehEND
/multiple displays are shown with L infront of them/
W: MRS WARHAGEN I NEED TO TAKE A DUMP
/most boys laugh and high five, L makes annoyed face/
MW: Bathrooms are that Way William. /sighs/

- - - Post Merge - - -

SOON MY CHILDREN

 

[Money Hunter]

so i cant rlly draw but i tried as a freeb

 

[biibii]

OOO nICE