The out of context quotes thread

[Midoriya]

"Do you think I'm an IDIOT?!?"
"Yes, because you're an M&M, and M&Ms don't have brains."

 

[-Mars-]

"Hmm 25 cents for some lemonade what a good deal!"
*lemonade price switches backwards*
"52 cents for some lemonade?! I- I just don't have that kind of money!"

 

[xSuperMario64x]

"of course! of course! of course! of course! of course! of course! of course! of course! of course! of course! of course! of course! of course! of course!" -poofesure

 

[-Mars-]

"Look, I know you really want to smash my toes but you need to fix that rockslide up away first okay?"

 

[WhiteLily210]

"What bag should we use for the party?"
"What about this one?"
"Oh we can't use THAT, that's a girls bag!"
"..."
"What?"
"It's a ORANGE bag with WHITE dots, HOW is that for girls?!?"
"It just looks like a girls ba-"
"WHY ARE YOU PUTTING GENDER ON A BAG?!?"

 

[oddbear]

“What are you eating?”
”Sludge.”
”…Okay?”

 

[ZeldaCrossing64]

"Jesus Christ, Matt! Give me a second-" *gets KO'ed* "GIVE ME A SECOND!!" -Poofesure

 

[BakaRina]

"I'm an easygoing person."
"I once saw you use a ruler to measure another ruler."
"It was off by half a centimeter. It never should have been in circulation!"

 

[ZeldaCrossing64]

"Maybe dreams do come true! Probably not. You guys all suck!"
*everyone claps anyways*

 

[ZeldaCrossing64]

"Abby, you're such a bad basketball player! But you're so cute, so it's okay!" -Poofesure

 

[Shellzilla_515]

"Nice! We got another fire going y'all!"

 

[xSuperMario64x]

"people who don't put their pronouns in their bio are just asking for someone to **** in their tennis shoes" - me for some reason


my sense of humor is wild

 

[Midoriya]

"Josuke, is it just me, or did your pasta come to life?"

"DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN, AYYY, DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN, EEE, DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN, OOO! DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN, AYY AYY AYY AYY!"

"HEHE, WHOOPS FELLAS, GOT TO GO!"

"Hey! Get back here you butt lickers, this is a playoff game!"

---

"Guys, I have a confession to make. Yukako kissed me."

*Josuke sips on his apple juice nonchalantly before almost falling out the window and spitting it out at the same time*

"What?! Are you okay, pal? Did she hurt you or anything?"

"No, I think I actually like Yukako."

*Background crowd goes "ooooooo"*

"But I'm so confused. I haven't seen her recently and she's been reported missing for three weeks!"

*Background crowd goes "awwwww"*

 

[-Mars-]

"Pay no mind to him... town's fool..."

 

[ZeldaCrossing64]

"Hit the ball like a burger, not a ******* chicken sandwich!" -Poofesure

 

[xSuperMario64x]

"Matt's the speed of lightning and my joycons operate at the speed of constipation" -poofesure

 

[Midoriya]

"This calls for a quiet and discrete Stand. My Hierophant Green is most suited for defeating it. Emerald.... SPLASHHHHHHHH!!!"

*series of loud noises*

---

"What's it planning to do?"

*Stand proceeds to write "Subscribe to Pewdiepie" in blood on the plane wall*

---

"YOU'RE SMOKING A CIGARETTE OF COURSE. SMOKING IS VERY BAD. HOW MUCH IS DIO PAYING YOU TO SMOKE, HUH?!?"

 

[allainah]

Screenshotted this from the site awhile back and still have it saved its so funny to me

 

[ZeldaCrossing64]

"Hold up, we need to get a two here. ...But we don't go for ties!"
(an orchestral remix of the Wii Sports theme starts playing in the background)
"We are not tying this game, this is a game-winning three situation."
*gets the 3-point shot blocked by Tyrone*
"NOOOOOOO!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! YOU'RE A ******* *****!!"
(a Wii Remote can be heard being thrown in the background)
-----
"No, stop going in! We wanna take-" *gets the ball swatted away by Tommy*
*uncontrollable screaming* "STOP JUST STANDING THERE, AND DO SOMETHIIING!!!"
(the other teams scores another point) *maniacal laughing* "I'M LOSING MY MIIIND!!"

 

[xSuperMario64x]

"like this hat, that award is a symbol of--"

"it's a symbol that you're a chump!"