What's Bothering You?

just spending my morning reminiscing on my high school days when I would actually go to friends' houses and we would play games and hang out and do stupid stuff, it was always a blast. but now all my friends are growing up and moving on with their lives and I'm just... stuck here, prob never gonna feel that kind of connection again :,,,,,,)
 
^ those kinds of people are actually the worst. oddly enough they seem to become more vocal right around pride month. I've been lucky enough to not encounter any transphobic people irl (except my dad lol) but they are definitely some of the most draining and ignorant people on the planet.
 
moved into a new apartment in mid october since the other one strongly smelled of cat pee. this apartment has a lot of maintenance needs, big and small, to get it up to building code but maintenance hasnt come by to address it. last month i put a ton of time and energy into talking with the apartment people both in email and in person and it was really frustrating and nothing happened. they also charged us an extra 35 dollar fee they shouldnt have for november rent and said they would refund it both over email and in person but this still hasnt happened. i dont know what to do. i dont think its fair to live in an apartment not up to code, but i dont have the energy to put forward again to try and fix it most likely for no results. i could contact the city department of health but i dont really feel like going to all the trouble and ive wanted to give the complex the benefit of extra time since covid can make issues take longer, but its been over 2 months living here. its gotten really cold out so now the fact that the bedroom window isnt properly sealed has now become the biggest issue over the several outlets that dont work. there are so many needed work orders that it would take a while to list them all .-. i just feel defeated. i dont want to spend the little amount of time i have off work to deal with it but id also like to have a functioning and healthy apartment to live in. no need to respond or offer advice, i just kinda wanted to vent
 
not sure how much i can take in this house lmao. my nan, who's usually the only person who gives half a damn about me, ignored me all day. didn't once text or come upstairs to see if i'm alright despite me telling her yesterday that i was sick because of medication withdrawal, then left without bothering to even try and say goodbye or calling up to me like she usually would my siblings despite knowing i was awake because i went downstairs not long prior to refill my water. (didn't try talking to me then either.) mom hasn't bothered trying to see if i'm okay or talking to me either, though that's not really a surprise. she's never cared about me lol. my sister got shirty with me for pointing out that i shouldn't have to pay to eat one meal a day when nobody else does and i already pay £100 rent for... what? in the end, my kitten cares more about me than any human in my family. she heard me crying in the bathroom and clawed to be let in, then proceeded to purr and fuss me, lick my tears, headbutt me and try to distract me by playing, bless her.

and still no prescription. doubt my parents will go check the pharmacy again a little later before it closes, so i'll probably have to wait until monday, but i don't think there's much point waiting almost a week to go back on my meds after suddenly being forced to go off them, so...
 
I just learned from my parents that my sister and her kids have tested positive for the virus even though they gotten vaccinated. I told them that they need to get the Booster Shot to protect them against the Omicron Variant, but I guess they didn't get the message. I swear no one in my family has common sense. At least me and my parents were able to get both Vaccines and the Booster shot throughout the year, but the rest of my family didn't seem to do that.
 
My island was starting to lag in places today and after remembering it was all stored on a micro SD card I transferred the data back to my console. I restart the game and lo and behold the lag has gone, which is typical considering SD cards are meant to store data with a larger capacity. 🙄
 
I’m strongly considering taking a mental health day from work. I don’t know if I want to because I’d rather have the money, but sometimes it’s necessary? I mean the manager knew I was having a ****ty day yesterday (due to two coworkers being immature and insensitive) so I didn’t want my call-off reason to be obvious… I just don’t understand why people have to tease you about the smallest things that don’t even effect them. And yeah I know it’s best to ignore them, but it’s not hard to mind your own business?? It feels like high school all over again. There’s always someone like these two at every job, but I wish there weren’t. Just leave the drama at home and don’t drag it to work. Anyway… 99% chance I will be calling off, so hopefully these two stop with trying to cause drama.
 
The person I work for on Saturdays tried to answer the phone with the tv remote. I’m really scared that her health is starting to get worse and I don’t want to get attached to her, but I am a little and that scares me.
 
my back is so tense today, i just want someone to crack every bone in my body without hesitation.
 
feeling that mild burning pain in my upper stomach again 🙄
I really hope I don't have a stomach ulcer...
 
tooth pain is back, i’m out of pain meds and won’t be able to see a dentist until monday. 🤕
 
I am so busy on my one single day off and work is gonna be so slammed when I go back to work 5 days in a row after having one off. Plus I'm still sick. I felt like I haven't had real quality time to relax since like, 2 weeks ago. This Sunday and Monday, my usual days off, I was so sick, esp Sunday, so I did like nothing those days. Plus I procrastinated which is usual and that's when I'm usually 'productive' when I could have done a thing earlier this week. But I've been sick and tired all week. It's a time sensitive thing too, an Xmas gift. I wanted to go all out and do like, 10 pieces, but at this rate I'll be lucky if I do one good one. Aaaaaa.
 
Funny how I put in so much work to be a more likeable person, that I just looped back around to being unbearable. If I constantly put my mind to bettering myself and actually try to, then WHY isn't it working?
 
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