How do you feel about making friends with people with different political opinions?

[mayortiffany]

hi fellow canadian, i can assure you we have an equally terrifying right wing, our conservatives are just better at smiling about it and covering it up. it's our liberals who are more like the dems in the US.

if you want to look into it you should research what's been happening to indigenous people from the very beginning.

Hi fellow Canadian!

At the risk of getting too political on this thread, I would respectfully disagree. I do agree that our government has treated Indigenous peoples extremely terribly (implicitly and explicitly supported by all sides of the political spectrum when looking at historical + current treatment, mind you), but I would personally not call the Conservative party as a whole terrifying. I think that the right/left divide in Canada is complicated by the fact that there is really only one right-wing party at the federal level (the Conservatives), so all kinds of people on the right are all lumped in together under the big tent.

For me, it is an indication of just how relative politics can be to people.

(A reminder that I also better get moving on a political science assignment too, it's actually partly on how Canadian politics, especially on the left, uses a façade of inclusivity to exclude certain groups, but that is beyond the scope of this thread!)

 

[IonicKarma]

Friends are friends it’s ok to have different opinions as long as they don’t try to force constant conversations about it

 

[seliph]

I do agree that our government has treated Indigenous peoples extremely terribly (implicitly and explicitly supported by all sides of the political spectrum when looking at historical + current treatment, mind you), but I would personally not call the Conservative party as a whole terrifying.

i don't wanna derail the thread so i'll only respond to this but given the horrible racism and islamophobia we've seen just by quebec's leaders alone, how homelessness is treated across the provinces, how alberta has been putting forth anti-protest bills that specifically target indigenous people, and with how ontario's premier is currently putting thousands of ontarians at risk with the reopening of schools as well as refusing to close restaurants/bars for the sake of the economy, i stand by that our right wing is terrifying.

 

[mitfy]

politics is so polarizing in america now and views tend to be extreme. i feel safest around people who have similar political stances as me because the hot topics right now are like. racism, immigration, lgbt discrimination, facism, gun rights, etc. i don't approve of and i don't feel safe around people who have certain "beliefs" (aka are bigots in some way) that are considered political. honestly, smaller political differences don't matter to me, but if there is in any way a political opinion that insinuates that certain people are "lesser than," don't "deserve" certain things, or the like, then i don't really want to be hanging out with you.

it's less of "i don't want to be friends with conservatives" and more of "i don't want to be friends with people who don't believe in basic human rights"

 

[ting1984]

My husband and I have been together since 2004, married since 2016, and we are very different on the political spectrum. He's more liberal whereas I'm more conservative. My views more or less line up with the American Solidarity Party.

 

[Red Cat]

I wouldn't mind being friends with a conservative who's capable of having a serious intellectual discussion about politics, but I would refuse to be friends with someone who supports Trump. To me, supporting Trump at this point after all he's done is about more than just politics. It's a reflection of one's true character.

At this point, the choice between Biden and Trump is not about liberal vs. conservative; it's about basic human decency vs. demagoguery. Trump won't denounce white supremacism and he refuses to commit to respecting the results of an election. He got infected with COVID, but even after that does not show one ounce of empathy for the millions of Americans who have been infected with the virus with debilitating effects and the hundreds of thousands who have died from it without even being able to have loved ones nearby.

Trump is just an awful person, and if you support that, it says something about who you are. I don't care if you are for lower taxes or against the Green New Deal or are anti-abortion or whatever other policy reason you may have for supporting Trump even if you don't like his character. You vote for the entire package and if you vote for him for "policy" reasons, you are just as complicit in enabling the bigotry, hatred, and narcissism as a die-hard white supremacist. There are a lot of people who identify as conservative / Republican who support Biden because of this, and if they vote for him and immediately turn on him if he wins and try to replace him with a sane Republican in 2024, that's perfectly fine because that's normal politics. I look at this election as a decision on what kind of people we want our children to grow up to be and from that perspective I think this election is as close to a choice between good and evil as it can be. Hopefully the 2024 election will go back to being just plain liberal versus conservative as it should be, but good needs to prevail in 2020.

Conservatism is a system of beliefs and values that should be respected just like liberalism should be, but Trumpism is a moral failure like murder, rape, racism, sexism, xenophobia, homophobia, and other forms of bigotry. I just can't bring it upon my self to be associated in any positive way with someone who has any of those traits, even if that person is friendly to me personally. I have grandparents who are probably closeted Trump supporters (I know they are racist). I can't change the fact they are my grandparents and they love me, but I feel disgusted knowing that them being my grandparents doesn't change the fact they are terrible people for some of things they believe.

 

[Hypno KK]

Ah, I see. Looks like we had a bit of a miscommunication there about what frame of reference we were referring to, apologies on that!

I think this is very much affected by my own experience as a political science student and as a former debater and being forced to grapple with perspectives from across the political spectrum, but I personally am not as bound to political perspectives, to say that one 'wing' is inherently worth listening more to than others because of the label that has been attached to it.

I think it may also be influenced from living in a country where our 'right wing' is not actually that right wing when you compare it to the United States. Like, the Canadian Conservative party would probably be more like the right-leaning members of the Democratic party! Thinking about how politics is seen in different countries and cultures is really interesting to me.

Personally, I am friends with people who would be considered 'right wing' in the countries in which they live but who would absolutely not be considered 'right wing' in the United States (more 'left wing'). Similarly, there are people who might be considered 'far left' in their country but would more be 'centre' in the United States. Left/right labels can be very relative depending on where you are in the world.

I live in Europe and yes, the US "right wing" is really more extreme than mainstream right wing parties here.

This said, I'm familiar with Canadian politics and your Conservative party has a pretty bad track record, so the fact that they're less bad that Republics doesn't mean that much to me.

Also: I've grappled with perspectives across the political spectrum. It doesn't mean that in personal live I want to engage with opinions that are incredibly dehumanizing to those who are the most vulnerable in our society.

 

[DJStarstryker]

I used to think politics didn't matter for friendships as long as you didn't talk about the hot point stuff. But a few months ago my mother in law said a very transphobic thing. I honestly have not been able to look at her the same way ever since. I still care about her and all, but it bothers me. A lot. There's certain political things that don't matter, but IMO the ones involving peoples' rights are a lot more non-negotiable.

 

[pawpatrolbab]

A few people were liking my original post so I feel like I should come back and re-visit it. I've been told by my partner that I am left, I really know nothing about politics or get involved though. Nowadays I'm more hesitant to make friends with people who are extremely left and/or obsessed with constantly posting about everything bad in the world. My experience from those sorts have been nothing but bad so I am more wary of that, bonus caution if they're disrespectful towards others with differing opinions. Just a major red flag to me

 

[Manah]

I keep politics out of my friendship. That said, if you think some people shouldn't have the same human rights as others, that's not a political opinion, that's you being a ****ty person and I want nothing to do with you.

 

[nightglow]

The only friends I have are people on my social media accounts. They are pretty diverse. I understand people think differently than me for different reasons. However I also enjoy talking about those differences because I feel like everyone can learn something. I do delete people if they get consistently really hateful. Maybe I should have higher standards but I also view the world in a negative light anyway.
edit
Yeah I wanted to add another reason why I would delete people on my social media... when they insist on continuing a conversation I don't want to have with them and they twist what I said. I actually just deleted someone today who did that often and it is just annoying to me.

Another annoyance I consider deleting people over is insisting I am or other people are emotionally responding just because I am/or they are being direct in my/their response and not emotional. I only get this problem from males when they realize I am/or they are a female and the male doesn't like what I/they have to say.

 

[Crowsie]

So long as you're a good person (specifying good, because even bad people can be nice) our opinions don't have to line up at all. However, I make an exception when your personal policies infringe on other people's freedoms or lives. For instance, I couldn't be pals with a staunch pro-lifer, extremists (flat-earthers, QAnon, anti-vaxx), or someone who's prejudiced towards things people can't help like sexuality or race.

That said, I love debating with others so if you're not hateful I'd be more than happy to pick your brain over why you hold the beliefs you do.

 

[kayleee]

I am friends with people who’s opinions politically differ from mine. However, I have a hard time being friends with people who’s opinions morally differ, and there seems to be a lot of crossover in these areas as of late

 

[Tessie]

i cant be friends with anyone who strongly supports Trump.

 

[deleted]

Most of my friends are politically aligned with me, but there’s one exception. I am somewhat left-leaning and have a frenemy who is painfully conservative. I call him that because we get along pretty well in terms of personality (ie. We’re both closeted agnostics in a Catholic school) and have many classes together, but some of his views directly contradict mine in a way that just makes it impossible for me to call him a friend. He is anti-abortion, anti-BLM, anti-feminist, anti-LGBT, and anti-mask to name a few. I am mixed, female, bisexual, pro-BLM, and VERY pro-mask (in fact, I wrote an advocacy speech about it for a summer class we took together), so you can probably see why that’s a problem.

Every now and then, he tries to push his opinion on me, but I do not enable political discussions with him. I always assert my boundaries and tell him to stop when he tries to preach to me. I do not start discussions about anything remotely political with him either. For the most part, our conversations consist of memes, college, and the occasional vent. We are both in a similar situation of wanting to attend an out-of-state college but not having the money to do so without assistance, and that is what keeps this odd relationship going.

He is not a bad person, but his upbringing (including an anti-vax mother and possible emotional neglect due to favoritism towards his siblings) has greatly affected his perception of reality. I am hoping that college will open his mind.

 

[visibleghost]

theres a difference between not sharing political ideologies and having wildly different base values. i cannot be friends with people who think a certain group of marginalized peopke should die, but i can be friends with low key capitalism supporters (too much and it starts delving into the base values category)

 

[SublimeDonut]

I don't think it's very healthy to surround yourself with people and media that only repeats to you the positions you already have. It's good to have a civil conversation with someone who disagrees with you, I don't know about you guys but I find it entertaining. Of course some people support ridiculous **** and I can't stand them, though.

 

[moonbyu]

i'm perfectly fine with having friends that have different political opinions! i already kinda do!

however, if you're gonna talk my ear off about politics and it starts to seem like politics is living in your head rent free and if your views are simply just too disgusting and horrible.. then imma need you to step out.

 

[Livia]

I'll be friends with anyone. I don't mind what their views are as long as they don't talk about it constantly. Though according to this thread a lot of you guys wouldn't want to be friends with me.

 

[skogkyst]

In the current (US) political climate, I really struggle with maintaining friendships across the political spectrum. Politics has put me in such a constant state of worry and the gap between sides seems so large nowadays (not ideologically, necessarily, but definitely regarding character/personality). I've just resolved to avoid talking politics with certain people, but I can't lie and say it isn't hard to be close with people that hold beliefs I find fundamentally reprehensible.