Hypermasculinity

[Princess]

There's been a lot of discussion on gender, and gender roles recently so I feel like this thread is fitting.

I'm here to talk to you about a feminist issue: hypermasculinity.

Little disclaimer before we begin:
Now many of us know that there is a big issue regarding women gender roles/what it means to be a woman, but I would like to focus on hypermasculinity for this thread as it has a direct affect on what we perceive to be a women's "place". Also it is an incredibly important feminist issue that isn't talked about a lot, so it might be a good idea to shed some light on the topic as it allows others who are unfamiliar with feminism to see that, "wow feminism actually doesn't ignore men's issues!".

SO, what is hypermasculinity?

Well straight off of google we get: "Hypermasculinity is a psychological term for the exaggeration of male stereotypical behavior, such as an emphasis on physical strength, aggression, and sexuality."

Basically, we are defining how manly boys are based off of their lifestyle choices. From, does he even lift bro? to how tall he is, to not being able to SMELL A CERTAIN SMELL because it's too...girly??? (srsly just use the bodywash if you like it...) society has been telling boys you need to fit a certain mold, or else you're not manly enough, and therefore you don't deserve the title of the gender you identify with.

Why is hypermasculinity a problem?

Now a lot of issues stem from this mindset.

- Did you know that men are more likely to commit suicide than women? One of the best ways to prevent suicide is to openly talk about suicidal thoughts, or otherwise known as openly discussing your feelings. Yet, under a hypermasculinity lense, boys talking about their feelings are deemed weak, and unmanly.

Through shaming, society has let the best prevention against suicide become inaccessible to half of the world's population.

- Liking the colour pink, liking makeup, liking to cook, not enjoying hard labour, not being able to pay bills, wanting to be a stay at home father, being able to openly express your feelings for a platonic friendship, what is it about these things that prevent boys from taking part in? How does liking how your eyes look with eyeliner dictate your gender?* Why does having an interest/disinterest in a specific area, grounds for gender identify dismissal? Especially when gender identity is defined as "one's personal experience of one's own gender." How can we pass judgement on whether or not someone fits a gender mold, if a gender mold does not exist because gender is based on our OWN experience.

*I am not referring to biological sex. I am referring to gender identity.

Hypermasculinity is harmful to everyone.

How? Well, if boys partake in something "unmanly", there are a plethora of words hurled their way often associated with femininity and homosexuality. Therefore, we are associating undesirable traits with women and homosexuals and thus directly adding to the already negative views towards women and anyone in the LGBTQ+ community.

Don't believe me? Then why under the hypermasculinity lense, if men DO partake in "unmanly" interests, are men so keen to remind everyone of their gender and heterosexuality? Example:
guyliner
manbun
"no homo"
bromance
a "murse"
mancave
manny

(feel free to add more.)


Pally, what's the point of this thread?

Well children, basically, I just want to remind you if you are someone who identifies as a boy and you like """"girly"""" things, that is okay. You are normal. I will protect and love you forever. There is nothing wrong with you. And that goes for anyone and everyone who identifies with whatever gender they like. If you like something, go ahead and do it/wear it/own it. Just be safe and happy.

Spoiler: tw rape and abuse

I didn't discuss male rape survivors and male abuse survivors in this post, as I was worried it would be triggering to many, and plus we have a large young population on the forum. However, sexual assault and abuse are HUGE issues and incredibly serious and no survivor should ever be dismissed because of their gender. If there's enough interest I can add to the topic but for now I'll leave it at this.

 

[Kittyinpink87]

I also dislike "mancave" if that counts.

 

[LambdaDelta]

hypermasculinity is both completely hilarious and rather ironically pathetic

which makes for great entertainment whenever it breaks down


my brief thoughts on the matter

 

[Princess]

I also dislike "mancave" if that counts.

I'll add that, thanks!

 

[LambdaDelta]

does meninist count too?

even though that's an issue that extends far beyond just the word itself, but also with the regressive mindset of those who seriously label themselves as such

 

[King Dorado]

ha ha - i knew some people that had a "manny" they called him, instead of a "nanny..."

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does meninist count too?

even though that's an issue that extends far beyond just the word itself, but also with the regressive mindset of those who seriously label themselves as such

what is a meninist?

 

[LambdaDelta]

ps every time I see the word "meninist" I always read it as "menimist" and just think minimalist

rather fitting imo

 

[Princess]

does meninist count too?

even though that's an issue that extends far beyond just the word itself, but also with the regressive mindset of those who seriously label themselves as such

Meninists are different as they do not attend to feminist issues at all. Just usually try to call out what they deem to be problematic females and that's it. (Little to no support for transmen, male rape survivors, etc.)

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ha ha - i knew some people that had a "manny" they called him, instead of a "nanny..."

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what is a meninist?

that is absolutely ridiculous, and basically men trying to derail the feminist movement lmao.

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added a little bit on rape and abuse

 

[Pokemanz]

This is very accurate. I can be rather feminine at times because I was raised solely by my mother, but that doesn't mean I don't do manly things. Frankly, if you want to do "girly" things, go right ahead. The only one stopping you is you, who cares what others think.

And on the meninist issue: I actually didn't think a word for it existed, but any woman who does not respect meninists is just awful. Women get mad when they are treated a certain way, but for whatever reason men aren't allowed to feel the same? Women demand gender equality, yet they want to be treated better than men and often scoff at being assigned hard work?

I could go on and on about that topic.

 

[Princess]

This is very accurate. I can be rather feminine at times because I was raised solely by my mother, but that doesn't mean I don't do manly things. Frankly, if you want to do "girly" things, go right ahead. The only one stopping you is you, who cares what others think.

And on the meninist issue: I actually didn't think a word for it existed, but any woman who does not respect meninists is just awful. Women get mad when they are treated a certain way, but for whatever reason men aren't allowed to feel the same? Women demand gender equality, yet they want to be treated better than men and often scoff at being assigned hard work?

I could go on and on about that topic.

I think you're unclear on what meninism and what feminism is about. Feminism is for all genders. Like I said all meninists are a group of people, who solely pick on females who they deem to be problematic all while ignoring men's issues. There is NO activism for men rape victims, NO activism for transmales, NO activism for boys who do like girly things. Meninists fall under the hypermasculinity lense as the only reason they emerged was because attention was being brought to women's issues aka men were out of focus for like 5 seconds.

 

[LambdaDelta]

Would they even have any support or activism for female rape victims either?

Like I feel like they'd be the sort of people who would say "she was asking for it" with a perfectly straight face.

 

[crystalchild]

i think hypermasculinity is hilarious on the surface, but in reality it's just a really sad and unfortunate societal phenomenon. it's easy to make fun of these silly boys and their antics, and to criticize their obsession with being "masculine", but the consequences of not conforming can be pretty bad. dudes can get quite vile with each other. and it just perpetuates this awful cycle.

i think it is very important to focus a little on this when discussing feminism. a lot of males have a very inaccurate view on what feminism pertains. hell, someone has already displayed confusion in this thread. many men rightfully recognize that they face issues relating to their gender, too, but what they don't always realize is that those issues are a direct product of misogyny. and since humans are generally pretty selfish creatures, it really helps our case to show that, yes, you do benefit from feminism as well. so yeah, preach.

 

[visibleghost]

yeah. gender norms hurts everyone, regardless of gender.
how many times hasn't like everyone heard someone tell someone else to "man up", "be a real man" or whatever for showing emotions or doing something that isn't considered "manly enough"

i despise hypermasculinity sooooo much. honestly I'd say that it is one of many reasons to why homophobia, transphobia and sexism are still so big things. at least in my own experience it's usually the same people who tell kids to "man up" who call other people gay (honestly don't think I need to explain how they say this), girls ("you throw like a girl") and stuff like that.
like, being the tiniest bit feminine is like the worst fear of these people.

I fully believe that the world would be a much better place if gender roles and norms were just exterminated.

 

[oath2order]

does meninist count too?

even though that's an issue that extends far beyond just the word itself, but also with the regressive mindset of those who seriously label themselves as such

I thought that was originally a parody that actually became a real thing somehiw

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Also manbuns are a crime against style.

 

[King Dorado]

I dont know what manbuns are and I dont think I wanna know either...

 

[Princess]

Would they even have any support or activism for female rape victims either?

Like I feel like they'd be the sort of people who would say "she was asking for it" with a perfectly straight face.

Many of them are, unfortunately.
It's not as it they're going up to every rape survivor and saying it was the victim's fault necessarily, but meninists often support rape culture.

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I thought that was originally a parody that actually became a real thing somehiw

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Also manbuns are a crime against style.

Men wearing buns have existed in various cultures for thousands of years. The western need to add man to the word is ridiculous though.

 

[Tao]

With some of those terms mentioned, I have to question whether or not men (or people in general) are using these terms because they're uncomfortable with doing 'thing', or whether they're just using it because it sounds funny and amuses them.

Like 'Bromance'. It's pretty much just used by people because it's a pun and they think it's funnier than it is. The only time I've ever seen it legit used as "we're friends but we're not gay, we promise" is in TV shows and movies. And memes I guess. 'Bromance' is essentially a meme.

Something like 'manny' or 'murse'? Yea, that's probably a legit attempt to make male nanny and nurse 'less gay' when there's not really anything wrong with it in the first place. These are the ones that should be focused on, not 'mancave' or 'bromance' that are more often than not used for solely for giggles.

I dont know what manbuns are and I dont think I wanna know either...

They're the thing they put Murgers on at ManDonalds. Maybe with some tomanto or BroBQ sauce.

 

[Princess]

With some of those terms mentioned, I have to question whether or not men (or people in general) are using these terms because they're uncomfortable with doing 'thing', or whether they're just using it because it sounds funny and amuses them.

Like 'Bromance'. It's pretty much just used by people because it's a pun and they think it's funnier than it is. The only time I've ever seen it legit used as "we're friends but we're not gay, we promise" is in TV shows and movies. And memes I guess. 'Bromance' is essentially a meme.

Something like 'manny' or 'murse'? Yea, that's probably a legit attempt to make male nanny and nurse 'less gay' when there's not really anything wrong with it in the first place. These are the ones that should be focused on, not 'mancave' or 'bromance' that are more often than not used for solely for giggles.




They're the thing they put Murgers on at ManDonalds. Maybe with some tomanto or BroBQ sauce.

That's the thing about misogyny though, a lot things hide in plain sight as a "joke", until we question it. Why is two men sharing a close friendship considered funny? A lot of us have been kind of...trained to laugh at these things because they're a direct reflection of gender norms that exist in society.

Also your definition of manbuns lmaooo +1

 

[King Dorado]

oooh, here's one: ive heard people refer to men's sandals as "mandals..."

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haha- and you forgot about "man-purse"

and "man-boobs"

 

[Tao]

That's the thing about misogyny though, a lot things hide in plain sight as a "joke", until we question it. Why is two men sharing a close friendship considered funny? A lot of us have been kind of...trained to laugh at these things because they're a direct reflection of gender norms that exist in society.

I don't think anybody really does think that a close friendship (or 'super friends' as the dictionary should define it) with two guys is funny/wrong/weird, that's what I'm kinda getting at. I've only even started seeing the term 'bromance' in the past few years (maximum), before that men seemed pretty fine with doing the 'best friend' stuff and admitting they're platonically 'close' with somebody.

It's only since they started using 'bromance' that people are really questioning it, when it's more likely just guys thinking 'bromance' is a punny way of saying 'best friend'.