The out of context quotes thread
- Thread starter Midoriya
- Start date
ZeldaCrossing64
Sugary Cynic
"Loading screens are the only thing that stands between me and happiness."
Captain Jigglypuff
Leader of the Jigglypuff Army
“Mrs Oblong, the court records show that you’ve left your daughter alone at the wharf, in a giblets bucket at the slaughterhouse, at the casino, dog racing track, Akron, Ohio….”
QueenCobra
a thousand words in one sigh
“I watched a woman get born today. No, not give birth. Get born.”
Captain Jigglypuff
Leader of the Jigglypuff Army
*Pickles in the car patting something*
“As soon as we get home, baby, you and Mommy will spend some quality time together.”
*Zoom out to show a 6 pack of vodka with a seat belt securing it in the passenger seat. Pickles then drives off and a cut of Beth being left behind in the parking lot is seen*
“Oh boy….”
“As soon as we get home, baby, you and Mommy will spend some quality time together.”
*Zoom out to show a 6 pack of vodka with a seat belt securing it in the passenger seat. Pickles then drives off and a cut of Beth being left behind in the parking lot is seen*
“Oh boy….”
xSuperMario64x
call me Bug 🇨🇦💜🐛
"Jaws of Life, aka, the Jaws. victim's trapped in a car, this baby will peel it like an orange."
"yeah, let's see what it does with a real orange."
"yeah, let's see what it does with a real orange."
ZeldaCrossing64
Sugary Cynic
"Listen, I don't think we should let Kyle be a ninja, okay? He said ninjas were gay! He's probably gonna try to turn it around on me, but that's 'cause Kyle knows I heard him."
"You're talking to Kyle right now."
"You're talking to Kyle right now."
ZeldaCrossing64
Sugary Cynic
"If your death wasn't in my hands, this would absolutely be a non-problem for me."
ZeldaCrossing64
Sugary Cynic
♬ "Whenever I see Jesus up on that cross, I can't help but think that he looks kinda hot." ♬
"Imagine a world where Hitler was still alive..."
"Today on Hitler, we'll be talking with Hollywood hunk, Christian Slater!"
"Now, tell me, in your next movie, we get to see your butt."
"Ahahah, yes-yes you do."
"Can we see it right now?"
"Well, uhhh, alright, Hitler."
"OH! OH! HE'S GOING TO DO IT!"
"If you live in the Los Angeles area and would like tickets to Hitler, call 213-DU WERDEST EINE KRANKENSCHWESTER BRAUCHEN!"
"Today on Hitler, we'll be talking with Hollywood hunk, Christian Slater!"
"Now, tell me, in your next movie, we get to see your butt."
"Ahahah, yes-yes you do."
"Can we see it right now?"
"Well, uhhh, alright, Hitler."
"OH! OH! HE'S GOING TO DO IT!"
"If you live in the Los Angeles area and would like tickets to Hitler, call 213-DU WERDEST EINE KRANKENSCHWESTER BRAUCHEN!"
Captain Jigglypuff
Leader of the Jigglypuff Army
“Now we will begin the word association section of the test….”
“Breasts.”
“Mr Duckman, we haven’t even begun!”
“Breasts.”
*Fluffy and Uranus look at each other in confusion*
“Cat.”
“Breasts.”
“Black.”
“Breasts.”
“Cow.”
“Breasts.”
“Tanzania!”
“Breasts.”
“Dolly Parton.”
“Bad hair. Next!”
“Breasts.”
“Mr Duckman, we haven’t even begun!”
“Breasts.”
*Fluffy and Uranus look at each other in confusion*
“Cat.”
“Breasts.”
“Black.”
“Breasts.”
“Cow.”
“Breasts.”
“Tanzania!”
“Breasts.”
“Dolly Parton.”
“Bad hair. Next!”
QueenCobra
a thousand words in one sigh
“Not a bit of good. Not a bit. I’d put a stake through her heart and garlic around her neck to make sure she never comes back.”
(R.I.P. Cathy Rutherford)
(R.I.P. Cathy Rutherford)
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ZeldaCrossing64
Sugary Cynic
"So only three of my ribs were broken by Rosie today. Not the worst."
"Ditto. I just had a fractured femur and a bruised sternum. Life goes on."
"Ditto. I just had a fractured femur and a bruised sternum. Life goes on."
QueenCobra
a thousand words in one sigh
“We’ve had SEX…rather, six consecutive days of….”
“OK. All right. That was a Freudian slip but we’re gonna pretend like we didn’t hear it.”
“OK. All right. That was a Freudian slip but we’re gonna pretend like we didn’t hear it.”
"I was going to tell you the story of what happened. So basically, when I was inside the Uber driver--"
*brief pause while nothing is said*
"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that."
"SORRY, I meant when I was inside the Uber car."
"Hey! Phrasing!"
(my friend and I a year or two ago)
*brief pause while nothing is said*
"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that."
"SORRY, I meant when I was inside the Uber car."
"Hey! Phrasing!"
(my friend and I a year or two ago)
ZeldaCrossing64
Sugary Cynic
"I tried doing what you said, but apparently there was a trampoline below from where I was falling, and so I couldn't die."
"That is the dumbest thing I've ever heard."
"That is the dumbest thing I've ever heard."
Please keep your hands and feet inside the car at all times, because there are tiny asteroids travelling at incredible speeds, hurtling through space. Keeping your hands and feet in the car won’t prevent you from being hit, but our lawyers tell us we have to say it anyway.
