ZeldaCrossing64
Sugary Cynic
"I'm so embarrassed. I wish everybody else was dead!"
The out of context quotes thread
- Thread starter Midoriya
- Start date
Captain Jigglypuff
Leader of the Jigglypuff Army
“I always forget that he can talk.”
Captain Jigglypuff
Leader of the Jigglypuff Army
“You have tetanus,” Dr Stable told Rainbow Dash. “It says here that you had relations with a sink?”
“That little sneak!” said Rainbow Dash, “He told me he was clean! Tell me, will the baby be okay?”
“Wait. Are you saying that you are pregnant and this inanimate object is the father?!”
“Yes,” replied Rainbow Dash with tears in her eyes, “and the jerk won’t pay child support!”
“That little sneak!” said Rainbow Dash, “He told me he was clean! Tell me, will the baby be okay?”
“Wait. Are you saying that you are pregnant and this inanimate object is the father?!”
“Yes,” replied Rainbow Dash with tears in her eyes, “and the jerk won’t pay child support!”
ZeldaCrossing64
Sugary Cynic
"I'm a little tired right now. Would it be alright if I just gave them a savage beating?"
Captain Jigglypuff
Leader of the Jigglypuff Army
“Okay, who threw that ball?!”
“It was that Jerome kid.”
“What? No! I was trying to get the ball and it flew backward!”
“Do you know how much my head hurts?”
“No more than that waistband in those shorts I’m guessing….”
“Okay now I‘m mad!”
*Starts whacking Jerome with stick*
“Ow! Screw this! I’m outta here!”
*Jerome runs out of the gym*
“Come back here! This is making me feel better!”
“It was that Jerome kid.”
“What? No! I was trying to get the ball and it flew backward!”
“Do you know how much my head hurts?”
“No more than that waistband in those shorts I’m guessing….”
“Okay now I‘m mad!”
*Starts whacking Jerome with stick*
“Ow! Screw this! I’m outta here!”
*Jerome runs out of the gym*
“Come back here! This is making me feel better!”
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QueenCobra
a thousand words in one sigh
"I got beans, greens, potatoes, tomatoes, lamb, ram, hogs, dogs, chicken, turkeys, rabbit...YOU NAME IT!!"
A casino where I'm winning? That car must have killed me! I must be in heaven!
(pulls lever again and wins)
A casino where I always win? That's boring. I must really be… in hell!
No, Mr. Smith. You're not in heaven or hell. You're on an airplane.
(opens window and reveals there is a gremlin on the wing)
There's a gremlin destroying the plane! You've got to believe me!
Why should I believe you? You're Hitler!
(pulls out mirror to show him he really is Hitler)
NO!
(Eva Braun is sitting next to him all of a sudden)
Eva Braun! Help me!
(pulls off mask and she actually has the head of a giant fly)
Aaaahhh!
(pulls lever again and wins)
A casino where I always win? That's boring. I must really be… in hell!
No, Mr. Smith. You're not in heaven or hell. You're on an airplane.
(opens window and reveals there is a gremlin on the wing)
There's a gremlin destroying the plane! You've got to believe me!
Why should I believe you? You're Hitler!
(pulls out mirror to show him he really is Hitler)
NO!
(Eva Braun is sitting next to him all of a sudden)
Eva Braun! Help me!
(pulls off mask and she actually has the head of a giant fly)
Aaaahhh!
ZeldaCrossing64
Sugary Cynic
"Look, I don't know about your previous captains, but I intend to do as little dying as possible."
Captain Jigglypuff
Leader of the Jigglypuff Army
“Who wants dolphin?”
“Gasp! But dolphins are intelligent!”
“Not this one! He blew all his money on instant lottery tickets.”
“Oh.”
“Gasp! But dolphins are intelligent!”
“Not this one! He blew all his money on instant lottery tickets.”
“Oh.”
Captain Jigglypuff
Leader of the Jigglypuff Army
“I’m only going on a diet once I hit rock bottom.”
“You’re wedged like a human cork in a sewer pipe. I’m pretty sure this is rock bottom.”
“You’re wedged like a human cork in a sewer pipe. I’m pretty sure this is rock bottom.”
"STAN!!!"
"Why Stan? Why did you take the bullet for me?"
"For the same reason I came here. For her."
"Francine, I was wrong to think I was ever any better than you."
"I wish I could go back and change the man I was..."
"You're the best so you deserve the best."
"You deserve... Fancy Feast."
"What?"
"Sorry, I mean Jesus, you deserve Jesus. I'm kind of bleeding out here."
"Why Stan? Why did you take the bullet for me?"
"For the same reason I came here. For her."
"Francine, I was wrong to think I was ever any better than you."
"I wish I could go back and change the man I was..."
"You're the best so you deserve the best."
"You deserve... Fancy Feast."
"What?"
"Sorry, I mean Jesus, you deserve Jesus. I'm kind of bleeding out here."
ZeldaCrossing64
Sugary Cynic
"Oh, right. That dude he head-butted? The guy was a Danish prince! Can you believe that?"
"Pfffft, the Dutch?"
"Pfffft, the Dutch?"
Captain Jigglypuff
Leader of the Jigglypuff Army
“What happened to all those meaty juicy sausages?”
”Sorry. Evidence.”
”Sorry. Evidence.”
Captain Jigglypuff
Leader of the Jigglypuff Army
“Well I’ll be a monkey’s uncle!”
“Ohhhhh. So it’s okay when you say it?”
*Shock collar goes off*
“Ohhhhh. So it’s okay when you say it?”
*Shock collar goes off*
Captain Jigglypuff
Leader of the Jigglypuff Army
“I saw heard these people coming and thought they looked insane!”
“Oh we‘re not insane! We’re from Jersey.”
“Oh we‘re not insane! We’re from Jersey.”
QueenCobra
a thousand words in one sigh
“Behold…a torture chamber!”
