But I can just never do anything right. I hate the person I was born to be and I just hate myself so much right now, lol. I always hurt people's feelings and don't even care at the time and then get upset when it's too late.
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What's bothering you?
- Thread starter Sanaki
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Liquid Ocelot
dead + tired
Shh. Seriously. None of that is the truth. It's just what you're telling yourself- you have to be your own friend sometimes, and I know that seems like a stupid thing to say right now, but hating yourself doesn't solve anything- at the very least, allow yourself to forgive yourself. Even if you are a giant ******* which I really doubt you are, you can forgive yourself for now and work on what's bothering you later. I don't care if you haven't done one right thing in your entire life. Just forgive it.
If I had thought about that sort of stuff before I tried to kill myself, I would have spent a hell of a lot less time in the hospital.
I know you probably feel burdensome or like things are happening at all the wrong times, but that's how this stuff works, and people are here to talk to you- they WANT to talk to you- you're not bothering anyone, or a burden, or anything. Like, people have been exactly where you are, feeling like you're feeling, so you're not even alone, and it's not going to feel like this forever.
I'm ranting. I'm sorry. It kinda pushed my buttons.
It's fine, it helped me think a little bit. I just cry and completely rant about how much I hate me. But if I can't let it go, how can I better myself..? I don't know, I find it hard to forgive myself.
Saylor
sleepyhead
I know I don't know you or the situation but I think you're being hard on yourself. Despite what you feel not everything you do is wrong, it's just what you're telling yourself. It isn't true. Everyone makes mistakes sometimes but you shouldn't let them define what kind of person you are, and I'm sure you're an amazing person. I don't have much to go off of course but that's the impression you've given me, at least. It's much easier said than done, I know, but you should really try to forgive yourself because you're being so hard on yourself and you shouldn't do that.
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Well thank you.. It's just I used to be nicer. >_> Thanks for the advice though.. it really helps.
Saylor
sleepyhead
Sorry for rambling but I've had similar feelings as you before and it's hard to give advice about it. :x All I can say is that I genuinely hope those feelings go away for you, it's tough feeling like that but hang in there.
Selene
🌸 A n g e l i c 🌸
Hope my teacher isn't insane like that ;(
part of me feels resentful towards my ~friends~ for only keeping me around until they decide they have no use for me anymore, at which point they decide to walk.
and on the other hand I just end up blaming myself. like. why am I so bland and vanilla and boring. obvs my fault. if I were more interesting then maybe they'd actually stick around.
lmao. so torn. I really hate having these internal battles with myself. it's exhausting. I just end up equally hating people and hating myself.
and on the other hand I just end up blaming myself. like. why am I so bland and vanilla and boring. obvs my fault. if I were more interesting then maybe they'd actually stick around.
lmao. so torn. I really hate having these internal battles with myself. it's exhausting. I just end up equally hating people and hating myself.
KiloPatches
Senior Member
My bicycle got stolen. Right outside my building. It was locked securely too. Someone must have been awfully determined. It was a valuable bike, but more so, it was priceless to me. 
I have so many memories attached to it. I guess I am going to have to buy a new bike.... I am so heartbroken over this.
I have so many memories attached to it. I guess I am going to have to buy a new bike.... I am so heartbroken over this.
Liquid Ocelot
dead + tired
I can't feel your pain, and honestly I don't know if you're exaggerating, which pains me. I want to take what you feel at face value, of course, but it's difficult since you're used to turning everything into a catastrophe.
I shouldn't have told you to suck it up, but that's what I've been doing my whole ****ing life. That's the thing my dad told me to do, and I don't know anything else. I'm not lying. Life ****ing sucks and stuff hurts and things don't work the way they're supposed to. I don't know how to sympathize with you because I can't tell if you're being dramatic or not. I don't know what you want me to do. I know you work. I show you every day that I love you and care about you and I go out of my way to make you comfortable.
But I'm really getting sapped here, and I've got to start focusing on school and ****. I know it hurts. Just- please. Either tell me the extent of what you're feeling, or get over it.
I shouldn't have told you to suck it up, but that's what I've been doing my whole ****ing life. That's the thing my dad told me to do, and I don't know anything else. I'm not lying. Life ****ing sucks and stuff hurts and things don't work the way they're supposed to. I don't know how to sympathize with you because I can't tell if you're being dramatic or not. I don't know what you want me to do. I know you work. I show you every day that I love you and care about you and I go out of my way to make you comfortable.
But I'm really getting sapped here, and I've got to start focusing on school and ****. I know it hurts. Just- please. Either tell me the extent of what you're feeling, or get over it.
Liquid Ocelot
dead + tired
Had that all the damn time when I was younger. It sucks. Hope you feel better.
I laughed way too much at that. Thanks.
Mephisto Pheles
Head of True Cross Acad.
I have the hiccups ; - ;
I think my dad has to drop me off to school today. I don't like it when be drpps me off since he's obviously tired, so it's scary. We once ran into the back of someone's car, this is sort of why im scared.
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