What's bothering you?
- Thread starter Sanaki
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Ghost Soda
(he him or they them)
uh, it's not manga studio, bro. it used to work fine for me. it's just acting like crap right now for no bloody reason.
KiloPatches
Senior Member
My kidney stones are back it seems. I went to the doctor for a follow up and I have been in pain lately and had some nausea and se took a urine sample and found blood in it, gave me an antibiotic, sent me for some bloodwork, when the results come I will go in for a CT Scan, find out what the causes are. It could be calcium deposit build up from one of my meds - a very rare side effect we are trying to root out. The medication is to counteract the weight gain that my other medications cause. I told my father this over the phone and he asked me how much I weigh. "189lbs" I said, embarrassed (lying too, I am actually 191lbs)..... keep in mind I have a lot of muscle built on me too from all the swimming and boxing I do.
"That's too much, you know that's too much, right?" he said. OF COURSE I DO. YOU DON'T THINK I FEEL ASHAMED?!?! *cries in a corner* But I want his approval and he makes me feel like ****, he makes me have body image issues, even though my boyfriend tells me every day he is an ***hole and that I am beautiful inside and out and that he is not into fat chicks, but he is into me, and he wouldn't be if I was morbidly "fat". My Dad proceeded on a rant about how I have to lose weight, how its bad for my health, how this, how that..... like he can't love a fat daughter..... meanwhile I eat well and exercise..... AND I got my cholesterol and blood sugar checked and both are fine..... I don't know..... Is he the problem or am I?
Saylor
sleepyhead
I hope your pain goes away and you feel better soonMy kidney stones are back it seems. I went to the doctor for a follow up and I have been in pain lately and had some nausea and se took a urine sample and found blood in it, gave me an antibiotic, sent me for some bloodwork, when the results come I will go in for a CT Scan, find out what the causes are. It could be calcium deposit build up from one of my meds - a very rare side effect we are trying to root out. The medication is to counteract the weight gain that my other medications cause. I told my father this over the phone and he asked me how much I weigh. "189lbs" I said, embarrassed (lying too, I am actually 191lbs)..... keep in mind I have a lot of muscle built on me too from all the swimming and boxing I do.
"That's too much, you know that's too much, right?" he said. OF COURSE I DO. YOU DON'T THINK I FEEL ASHAMED?!?! *cries in a corner* But I want his approval and he makes me feel like ****, he makes me have body image issues, even though my boyfriend tells me every day he is an ***hole and that I am beautiful inside and out and that he is not into fat chicks, but he is into me, and he wouldn't be if I was morbidly "fat". My Dad proceeded on a rant about how I have to lose weight, how its bad for my health, how this, how that..... like he can't love a fat daughter..... meanwhile I eat well and exercise..... AND I got my cholesterol and blood sugar checked and both are fine..... I don't know..... Is he the problem or am I?
Also wow you're really cute!!-
I haven't eaten anything at all today and I'm super tired lately but can't seem to sleep when I try going to bed. Things are also getting bad between my parents and I, so I'm stressed out and worn out and it showed when I was with my friends today; I feel bad that they were hanging around me while I was like that.
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CookingOkasan
C H A T B O T
Lonely night, what up...
KiloPatches
Senior Member
I hope your pain goes away and you feel better soon
-
I haven't eaten anything at all today and I'm super tired lately but can't seem to sleep when I try going to bed. Things are also getting bad between my parents and I, so I'm stressed out and worn out and it showed when I was with my friends today; I feel bad that they were hanging around me while I was like that.
Thank you, Saylor..... *hugs*
My Dad is also used to seeing me thinner..... refer to these pictures....
http://www.belltreeforums.com/showt...ou-Look-Like&p=4391257&viewfull=1#post4391257
To think of it, I haven't eaten anything either..... and I haven't been able to keep down any liquids.... ugh.... kidney stones are the WORST.
I am sorry things are bad between your folks. It happens. When you are in that sort of environment you're bound to show it around people. I am sure your friends would understand.....
- - - Post Merge - - -
I hear ya. I am lonely too. We can be lonely together. *high five*
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Came down with food poisoning. I nearly vomited all over my bed as I was trying to sleep. Apart from the nausea and dry heaving, my head feels light, my muscles hurt and I just generally feel like ****.
I wish I had a stronger immune system, as I get ill way too often.
In conversation with my therapist I was told that my recently discovered schizophrenia may be the bigger culprit in my life's problems, rather than the ASD. I'm going to be forwarded to a new place where they'll be working with me to teach me about my condition, how I can live with it, and, obviously, give me medication for it. The place I was at focuses entirely on autism and related disorders, so they can't help me with this.
I've been going there for almost a year now, so the switch to another place doesn't excite me at all. Just when I'd gotten used to this place, I have to move again.
I wish I had a stronger immune system, as I get ill way too often.
In conversation with my therapist I was told that my recently discovered schizophrenia may be the bigger culprit in my life's problems, rather than the ASD. I'm going to be forwarded to a new place where they'll be working with me to teach me about my condition, how I can live with it, and, obviously, give me medication for it. The place I was at focuses entirely on autism and related disorders, so they can't help me with this.
I've been going there for almost a year now, so the switch to another place doesn't excite me at all. Just when I'd gotten used to this place, I have to move again.
I'm constantly telling myself i'm not worth it
i'm getting angry so easily and i go through periods where i hate evryone of my friends and telling myself that i don't deserve any of this and I can't take my mind off it if I make a mistake I beat myself up over it and I'm getting jealous of every little thing and I end up trying to hide it and ugh
#bpdfeels
i'm getting angry so easily and i go through periods where i hate evryone of my friends and telling myself that i don't deserve any of this and I can't take my mind off it if I make a mistake I beat myself up over it and I'm getting jealous of every little thing and I end up trying to hide it and ugh
#bpdfeels
Ghost Soda
(he him or they them)
My kidney stones are back it seems. I went to the doctor for a follow up and I have been in pain lately and had some nausea and se took a urine sample and found blood in it, gave me an antibiotic, sent me for some bloodwork, when the results come I will go in for a CT Scan, find out what the causes are. It could be calcium deposit build up from one of my meds - a very rare side effect we are trying to root out. The medication is to counteract the weight gain that my other medications cause. I told my father this over the phone and he asked me how much I weigh. "189lbs" I said, embarrassed (lying too, I am actually 191lbs)..... keep in mind I have a lot of muscle built on me too from all the swimming and boxing I do.
"That's too much, you know that's too much, right?" he said. OF COURSE I DO. YOU DON'T THINK I FEEL ASHAMED?!?! *cries in a corner* But I want his approval and he makes me feel like ****, he makes me have body image issues, even though my boyfriend tells me every day he is an ***hole and that I am beautiful inside and out and that he is not into fat chicks, but he is into me, and he wouldn't be if I was morbidly "fat". My Dad proceeded on a rant about how I have to lose weight, how its bad for my health, how this, how that..... like he can't love a fat daughter..... meanwhile I eat well and exercise..... AND I got my cholesterol and blood sugar checked and both are fine..... I don't know..... Is he the problem or am I?
i say stop talking the him. seriously, just cut off all ties with this *sshole. you have no obligation to keep subjecting yourself to this toxic person, especially if he's giving you problems about your weight instead of acting like a freaking person and just caring about your well being.
KiloPatches
Senior Member
Thank you. He also is very homophobic.
I used to have long hair:
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