What's Bothering You?

[-Mars-]

Feeling really pissed off and I need to blow off some steam

Spoiler: Long Rant

I'm feeling really pissed off because of that my old laptop broke down and I needed to buy a new one and I thought I could recover all my files if I bought a USB adapter cord thing and I plugged in into my hard drive and my new computer and transfer my files via USB cord connection but no that's not what happened, flashback:

It's all because I thought my files were physically stored onto my hard drive and I thought that if my laptop ever broke down my files were recoverable if I took the hard drive out, but apparently my computer syncs my files digitally on a online file hosting service called "OneDrive" and so I don't like OneDrive because when I boot up my computer and it tries to sync with OneDrive it takes like 10 minutes for it to load and sometimes my computer even needs to be restarted cause it can't load properly so I made the fatal mistake of turning off OneDrive because it's causing issues and I didn't understand it and thought it wasn't important, I thought how OneDrive works is that it makes "clones" of my files and stores them online for me incase I needed them, I thought it was not important cause the "original" files were on my hard drive but they aren't

Fast forward, when I took my hard drive out and plugged it into my new computer to copy my old files I could only copy my files before I turned off OneDrive, All of my files that were downloaded after I turned off OneDrive are gone, Everything downloaded after August 3rd 2022 is gone, 13 months worth of images are gone, I tried to log into my Microsoft/OneDrive to see if I can sync my files again but no I can't because I need to turn back on sync on my old computer that can't ****ing turn on

All my important files I cared about are all ****ing gone because it's all my fault. All of my drawings are gone, all of the art/signatures I had that other TBT members made for me are gone, all of my screenshots are gone, I had a folder I was working on making of all my aesthetics for my online accounts that was never finished that is now gone, I had a bunch of image resources I needed that are gone. All my folders filled with all my images are gone, hundreds of images worth are gone forever

Why did I ever make the mistake of turning OneDrive off because I was frustrated it was making my computer crash, it's all because of that everything is gone. I was thinking about making my Tumblr account be a image-storage for my files to be redownloaded again should my computer ever die on me but decided against that idea and I hate myself for that too.

I'm sorry it sounds stupid to cry over images but I am genuinely so upset, I'm upset my laptop broke down in the first place, I'm upset I needed to spend all my allowance to buy a new one, I'm upset because all my google bookmarks and my notes from my sticky notes app are gone and I thought "well at least maybe I can recover my files" but no, all I want is to have all my stuff back, now I have to spend god knows how long trying to search the internet for my all of my hundreds of images to be redownloaded again and that doesn't change the fact some of my stuff can never be redownloaded ever again

 

[nightglow]

Snip

It's not stupid. Sorry it happened. Files are tricky things sometimes. I assumed the same about OneDrive, so your not alone with that one.

 

[Millysaurusrexjr]

it's a small thing but I really wanna phase out this kinda old email address that I'm still using as my main email. It's just such a pain to try and think of allll the places that I've used it, and having to log in each place and change it.. and that's not counting dentists/doctors/specialists where I'll probably have to have receptionists change it for me manually... agh

I already phased out an ancient email address that I made back when I was literally in 5th grade, and yet I forgot to update my email in at least a few places after I had deleted the old email address. Luckily I was able to update the email address anyway but still

and then there will be family members who wanna send me stuff digitally every now and then but will send it to my old email address despite me telling them multiple times that I've updated to a new one!!

first world problems.

 

[xSuperMario64x]

had a dream that really stressed me out and felt like it lasted forever, and I finally woke up out of it about 40 min ago but now I'm really cold and not even being bundled up under my blanket can warm me up enough

 

[Yoshi155]

I hate getting lunch at school. People are such pieces of **** and shove into each other for some mid-ass food. I just want to eat lunch without being flattened.

 

[xSuperMario64x]

Spoiler

I was having a decent morning, but something came up and caused me to really reflect on the situation with me and my family, and honestly... it's so sad. I just feel so sad. I don't even know what to say. I wish I could get out of here, this place is so draining, physically and mentally and emotionally. It's heartbreaking.

I don't mean to get personal, but this situation I find myself in really is incredibly frustrating. I wish I could live with, oh I don't know, a normal and functioning family? Who actually shows me the love and care and respect that I deserve? I don't know... I don't know what to do with myself. I'm tired of pretending like things are okay when they really, really aren't.

 

[-Mars-]

-Snip-

Just to add salt to the wound:
When I was trying to copy my old files to my new computer I was confused why it suddenly stopped copying and assumed it was finished
so apparently my computer was trying to copy over 9GB worth of storage and it can't anymore because I get a warning "You have filled up 5GB out of 5GB of OneDrive storage, please pay to upgrade your storage!" This means that:
1: Even if I hypothetically did not turn off OneDrive and still had my lost files synced I can't even transfer them anyways because the free plan of OneDrive can only hold 5GB of storage worth and that's nothing, I had at least 20GB worth of storage that needed to be transferred
2: OneDrive is actually useless for "protecting my files" in case something happens to them because you need to pay for a $84 yearly subscription service to be able to have enough cloud storage to sync your files.

Apparently I know nothing about computers because I just don't understand, my Switch and 3DS storage data on their Memory Cards and SD cards so the data will be safe as long as you have the Memory/SD cards, why does my computer not have the files on my hard drive? Is it on my memory chip or something? The files have to be physically stored somewhere right? I don't understand what's the point in keeping files on a cloud hosting service, it sounds safer to physically have them on a data-storing device

 

[xSuperMario64x]

just a sad night

 

[Caterpillarsarecute]

Spoiler: Very worried about my friend...

I'm extremely worried about her. Earlier today she messaged me and said she has to go to a mental hospital for a few days. I'm actually so worried about her and I feel so bad because I didn't know she wasn't feeling good.. It makes me feel like a really bad friend, but its also really hard to talk to her since we live in different states, and I cant get a phone, so we can really only talk on email. But it still makes me feel like bad friend.. My mom often asks if I'm messaging her and how she's doing, so if my mom asks I don't think I'm going to mention it...

 

[nightglow]

Endings are hard and funky. I know the saying is that endings are just new beginnings, but I mean, not all beginnings are good? Or at least appear great?
Idk..
Maybe sadness is just a big gray cloud that obscures everything.
I hope this autumn doesn't suck.

I'm tired and probably isn't helping me rn.

 

[Caterpillarsarecute]

I just slammed my foot really hard onto the side of the door and tripped and dropped my cup.. luckily my cup was empty and didn't break but my foot hurts.

 

[Drawdler]

I don’t have the focus to reply to everyone but it sounds like really sad stuff is happening to some of you recently, I’m so sorry. It really feels like the month has been a mess wherever I look ):

Personally just… today is lethargic and I’m having a bit of trouble focusing on what needs to be done. Nothing terrible for me.

 

[Stella-Io]

Why must a simple statement end up into whole discussion?

All I asked was my mom to find masking tape if she happens to be out at a shop. Which she did but it's contractor grade and regular masking tape already rips paper, which it's not supposed to do but it does anyway. And this isn't like printer paper I'm using it on, it's watercolour paper, cold and hot press so it thicker and has more texture than standard paper.

Then it became this whole thing where they keep telling me 'you have to look for it'. You literally just showed me what I want! It's the purple tape! I'm kind of home stuck and I HAVE been looking for masking tape when I'm out. They keep going out without me so how tf do you expect me to look when you don't take me out?

They showed me this purple tape that says it doesn't rip paper and I asked them to get me it. Yeah it's like 2x more expensive than masking tape (masking is like 3$ this purple tape is 8$+) but if it specifically says it doesn't rip paper, that's what I want, I don't want to rip paper. I'm using it to hang up prints I got and also for when I paint.

I plainly asked them to get it for me TWICE but I highly doubt they did. They make such an issue over somethin so small.

All of this over TAPE.

 

[oak]

There's so many accidents around today, I'm not looking forward to trying to get home in an hour. Traffic was at a dead stop yesterday and ppl wouldn't let me merge so I blew this old man a kiss and he let me in. Just a tip for yall incase yr stuck in bad traffic and not afraid to embarrass yrself

 

[Xara]

it’s crazy to think that this day two years ago was my last day of normalcy. it was the last day that i would recognize the life i was living, the last day where i had a general idea of what every day would bring; i wasn’t happy in that life, but it was at least familiar and i recognized everything and everyone in it. i spent my entire day 2 years ago working on my self-portrait for an art class. i thought the worst thing that would happen to me on september 20th, 2021 would be having to go to school.

tomorrow marks 2 years since my grandmother passed away, and it is only the beginning of a devastating 10 weeks. september 26th is the 2-years anniversary of finding out that zeva’s injured, and the 5 weeks that follow were spent with her struggling to breathe most of the time, having to rush her to the vet’s every other day, and her not being able to walk, jump, or get around 2 years ago. halloween is the last day i would get with her, halloween night the last time i would get to tell her goodnight. the 2-years anniversary of her death is november 1st, and i don’t know how it’s been almost 2 years when i feel like i’m still in the parking lot of the emergency vet’s. idk how to leave without her.

and then the 2 kittens we adopted 10 days later would turn out to be sick, and they would both die before they turned 1. i avoided death and loss and grief for 19 years, only for it to find me 4 times in less than 9 months. it’s so scary how quickly life can change. it’s scary that me 2 years ago had no idea what was waiting for her in just 16 hours.

 

[Seastar]

I typed a very long rant about my allergies and then lost it because my phone was being annoying and replaced it with something else that the forum then saved. Uggghh.
Anyway, I'm tired of suffering because nobody else in this house has the allergies that I do. Maybe I'll retype the full rant another time...

 

[Beanz]

-deleted

 

[Xara]

snip

i hope it’s okay that i reply to this, but i just wanted to say that i understand how you’re feeling. i was supposed to graduate high school in 2020, but i didn’t graduate until this past summer because due to my physical and mental health, it took me a bit longer to earn the credits and volunteer hours i needed. i turn 22 in less than 6 months, and i’m still very dependent on my parents and nowhere near ready to move out as well.

i know how bad it feels to be in a place in your life where you feel like you’re supposed to be doing something else somewhere else, especially when you compare yourself to other people your age, but that doesn’t mean you’re immature or that you’re doing things wrong. we’re all on a different journey in our lives, and not everyone will do things or finish things at the same pace, and that’s perfectly okay— you’re trying your best. you don’t have to be ready to move out or go to college right now just because other people are. it’s okay to go at a different pace.

i know you’ll get to where you want to be one day since you’re capable of amazing things, but there’s nothing wrong with where you’re at right now. you’re trying to get through grade 12 instead of giving up, and that in itself is amazing

 

[Asteroid]

Ugh. My mental health is getting worse. I have no clue as to why.

 

[themysterybidder]

Spoiler: Blossom, my Basset Hound (includes talk of surgery)

So, Blossom is due to go back to the vet next month, she goes every 3 months, just for a weight check so they can determine which dose of tablet to give her. It's nothing serious, it's just to act as a prevention for tapeworm, etc. But, next time we've got to decide if we should get her spayed. We have no intention of breeding her for puppies, but we were against the idea of getting her spayed from day one, as we didn't want to put her through any discomfort or pain. However, the last time the vet said that next month would be the best time as she's had her first heat, and she explained what could happen if she doesn't get spayed and she could end up in emergency surgery. I know, it's a simple operation and the chances of anything going wrong are very slim, but I can't help but worry about her. I'm in my 30s and she's my first pet, so I'm very protective of her, just like any good pet owner would be. I know whatever we choose we will always think what if she had or hadn't got it done? I hate to think of her being in surgery and then her recovery. I'm tearing up even writing this, as she's sitting at my feet looking up at me. Then, she makes me smile, by trying to eat my laptop wire.