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1000 Ways To Get Kicked Out Of Wal-Mart
Play 'Never Gonna Give You Up' really loudly while sitting on a tower of toilet paper proclaiming yourself as king
Steal a ***** and run around slapping people
The stars mean dildo
Drive around in one of those mini car's and slap everyone you see with a pool noodle.
Eat all the food because you know, you're hungry. :3
Take all the filled doughnuts, hide somewhere in the ceiling and throw em down on random passerbys
is it better to speak or to die?
Attempt to climb into one of the freezer doors and sit behind the food, if possible. If not, do not give up if you are not stopped.
In the case that it is possible, however, sit there and thrust your hand out at anybody who opens that door.
Back from Hiatus (3/18/22)
Make out with your girlfriend in the dressing rooms
Go to the sandwich isle or whatever demonic food thing they have and ask for this:
"I'll take a triple bossy deluxe, on a raft, four by four, animal-style, extra shingles with a shimmy, light axle grease, make it cry, burn it and let it swim in a bun."
Watch as they wheel your Bubble Bass right out of that place by your ass.
Dress up as a pretty pink fairy and run around and eat all of donuts and cupcakes
Replace the twinkies with bread stuffed with raw chicken.
Take a **** on the floor.
Take a **** on the floor.
Piss on the playboy magzines
Buy children's books, cut out the pages, replace them with...inappropriate images, and put them back in place. Make sure it's a popular book too; like a Dora book, or one of those weird MineCraft books.
Go to the hunting goods section, toy around with a firearm, and then ask the clerk where the antidepressants are located.
throw ping pong balls at people then hide behind a display repeatedly
force-feed raw coffee to the toddlers and force their parents to watch
Take all the sentenced candles and smell them and don't allow people to buy them while also making a fort out of them.
take out all the toy turtles, make a long line of them and push them around the store shouting CHOO CHOO TURT TRAIN