What's Bothering You?

Also no grandma I'm not going to actually spend time with you in person.. She's 86 turning 87 later this year and I don't want her to get/give any asymptomatic ****.

also you can also be nice to call back if you're saying that in my voicemail lol
 
also all these damn people still not wearing a mask & going to the beaches!
having to wear a mask is enough for me to not go anywhere at all, much less the beach. it's too hot/humid at the beach to wear a mask so i say just don't go there. I don't get why anyone would go somewhere that is generally crowded during a pandemic anyways.


my sleep schedule is all outta wack again, I was hoping to wake up early today so that I could spend more time at home while my dad is gone but I ended up waking up at around 1:20pm anyways. oh well, I guess I better start on dishes/cleaning.
 
Alright asshats, you know what? If that's the way ya'll wanna play it, then that's fine by me. I don't give a damn anymore. Obviously you are always going to victimize yourself and view me as competition, and you are just going to defend the living hell out of her. Teaming up to detest me? I don't wanna put up with this, and I don't HAVE to put up with this. If this is how it's gonna be, then I'll just do my own ****. I'll prove you guys wrong, because I am so sick and frustrated with you all pinning me down and telling me I'm worthless and weak. All these things like: "You can't make it! You'll never amount to anything without me!" Just you damn watch. There's a point when the sane person that gets demonized and called crazy actually goes crazy, because they are fed up with it. Again, you had your ****ing chance.
 
having to wear a mask is enough for me to not go anywhere at all, much less the beach. it's too hot/humid at the beach to wear a mask so i say just don't go there. I don't get why anyone would go somewhere that is generally crowded during a pandemic anyways.
YES my point exactly! Not to mention the beaches near me are considered hotspots. Why anyone in their right mind would be okay going to a hotspot zone is beyond me! I stay cooped up, but the number of cases & people just not giving a **** is mind-boggling.

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Feeling extra insecure these days. Some days I’m fine other days I can’t even look at myself in the mirror. Doesn’t help when those close to me call it “being dramatic”
 
idk what happened here but I'm sending some hugs and positive vibes your way. hope everything gets better soon 😔



so I'm kinda worrying right now cause I need to move back to campus soon and I want to bring my dog as an emotional support animal, but the disability dept has a policy that all ESAs have to be spayed/neutered. I have my dog's appt scheduled so he can be fixed but it's not until the 25th, whereas classes start somewhere around the 20th. I can't leave him home because my parents are incapable of taking care of him (my mom physically can't handle him and my dad is always gone at work). I want to contact disability services and ask them if I could still bring him (since his surgery is gonna be a few days after I move into my dorm anyways) but I'm afraid that they're gonna tell me no because "he doesn't fit all the requirements of an ESA."

i dunno I'm just freaking out about it because I don't want to leave him home with my parents. maybe if nothing ends up working out I can just stay home (off-campus) until everything is done and his paperwork is approved, that way I can bring him to my dorm with no issue. Luckily my driving test is on the 21st so by that point I should be able to drive myself wherever I need to go (even tho I gotta buy the stupid parking pass for that, it's $150 ughhhhjfkdjfkdjfg).

basically everything is a mess rn but it's all good i'm gettin it sorted out.
 
One of the calls at work this guy sounded like a psychopath... He was very angry and had a deranged laugh and tone. Why is it always I get these types of people when they come in... I really, really hope I can take care of his problem because I do not want to talk to him again.
 
One of the calls at work this guy sounded like a psychopath... He was very angry and had a deranged laugh and tone. Why is it always I get these types of people when they come in... I really, really hope I can take care of his problem because I do not want to talk to him again.
Ugh.. I'm sorry man, I kinda had those people IRL when I did work practice in a second hand store.. Like not dangerous but obviously that flipped :(

Also hnnng hope domestic mail properly updates...
 
I want to draw, but it's so hot that I can't and it's making me angry and stressed 😤
 
it's past 4:30 and I need to eat something but I don't want to. last night i was super hungry but after I ate I felt sick for over an hour. I don't want to feel that way again so I just can't get myself to go eat. but if I don't go eat then I'll continue to have no energy to do anything I need to do (work on commissions, work on my packing list, clean the bathroom, etc).
 
Random headache, and I wanted to go back to playin videogames while listening to music but headaches make that worse
 
i love having my mom drive me to the hospital because i couldn’t breathe only to find out i was likely having a panic attack😍
 
Feeling a bit stressed lately since it’s hard for me to get back into reality after vacation....
I have pre school work and I have to study math before it starts which is a bit painful for me.
 
Nobody will give me a dreamy egg or galaxy egg.
In all seriousness My boyfriend and I have been fighting a lot lately. I don't know why. Just today he talked about how he fears i'm cheating on him then proceeded to accuse me of cheating. Then he keeps telling me to befriend his ex because I bring her up a lot. And now he won't even talk to me. We're hot then we're cold it's yes then its no. We kiss and make up I just aaaah it's tiring. I know love we each other and I get he's bipolar but still..I hate fighting.
 
I hate myself for getting jealous of others. there is absolutely no need for me to be jealous but when someone gets something that I've been wanting my emotions just take over and I get so angry. and then it makes me get mad at myself for acting like such an idiot/fool.
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oh okay, jealousy comes from a lack of self esteem. it all makes perfect sense now.


seriously tho why does my self esteem have to be so ****ty.
 
Dwelling on the past has been affecting my habits for the past weeks. I couldn’t fall sleep until 4 A.M. last night, my diet has lacked variety, and I’m too scared to leave the apartment.
 
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