Christmas in my family has always been a huge deal for my family and the crutch of all this is my mom. She decorated the entire house, inside and out every year which was always gorgeous. She would throw a party for her friends (who yes were older ladies, but I enjoyed seeing them too since me and my mom worked at the same restaurant with them) and it really set the precedent of the holidays. Being with family, being with friends, and just enjoying each other. Christmas was always that time to indulge in all the good in all of these people no matter what else was going on. Needless to say the celebrations with my family were always the best, we'd play board games, have decadent meals, and it was the only time we knew we would all be together since me and my older sisters have our own lives. that was all my mom ever asked for.
This year has been really different and not for the better. My mom has had metastatic breast cancer and it came back in her brain this year. It really made her go down fast. She isn't mobile, independent with anything anymore, and needless to say can't do all those things she used to even last year. ITs really hard for me to watch her like that now since I know she misses it and its just got her in a different, more darker mindset I bet. But she is so caring, she wouldn't tell any of us kids about it, even if thats how she really feels. So with Christmas approaching fast, and the different dynamics of my family, this christmas is gonna be weird for sure. I think it can be great to put all that aside and just celebrate, but more likely its gonna force my family together and naturally this conversation comes up and causes more friction. I just want my mom's Christmas to be special, since its more than likely her last, but I have no control over my family in that regard. It retrospectively makes me hope I appreciated all that was done for me in those holidays now that its basically gone.
sorry its a sad story, but if anything for those other people who maybe aren't as happy at the holidays because they see other families and people doing things they wish. Just know that you aren't alone, be thankful for what you do have, and don't feel bad or upset, because it could all be changed quickly.