Are you good at making friends? (Real Life!)

[skarmoury]

No lmao I'm so terrible at making friends IRL and it's always been one of my insecurities that I feel I have way fewer friends than others. Of course I know number doesn't matter but idk I have a bad tendency to compare myself to others and end up self-loathing, so I just try not to think about it too much.

But the people who I consider my friends are those I can share things I normally wouldn't share to acquaintances. The people very close to me are those whose friendships have never wavered since. I have a best friend from grade school, a solid group from high school and college, and now in post-grad I've become close with people I was classmates with in college but never got the chance to talk to before. I'm very thankful with the few friends I have, they help me get out of my insecurities.

Also, low maintenance friendships are the best ❤ I can just slide into their DMs one day and be my silly self and they'll accept me with open arms LOL.

 

[Rowbowkid800]

Its sad to know that so many people are bad at making friends

 

[Fjoora]

I'm actually fairly good at it. I don't have a lot of social fear anymore, and I look relatively younger, so I sort of just come right at people and try to learn as much as I can about them, while sharing a lot about myself. It's in the connection of shared pain or struggle that you become close to people, and I've made a ton of friends and acquaintances that way this year just with that method alone.

 

[ting1984]

Bad at making friends, good at marriage.

 

[Katzenjammer]

I wish I could change my vote. I didn't mean to put terrible lol xD I just am terrible at keeping them, or they move away from me for various reasons. In real life I like to try to strike up conversations with others by paying them genuine compliments or things of that nature.

 

[deana]

I am good at meeting people / making acquaintances (small talk, introductions, and such) but I am not good at actually getting to the "being friends" stage. Basically I can't get into the friend zone

 

[Airysuit]

Im good at making friends, I'm just not good at keeping them

In my relationships i need to be able not to speak to someone for 3 months but also sometimes speak to them everyday all day for a week

 

[deleted]

I have a small group. Honestly, small talk is hard for me.

 

[Lynnatchii]

Yeah, I'm pretty good. I always start out with being shy, but the more time i spent withe the person the more friendly i feel? I do have a best friend and a really nice friend

 

[TheSillyPuppy]

I'm pretty good. I'm a good listener, so for initially meeting someone new, my strategy is asking them about themselves -- people generally love talking about themselves. I have several groups of friends that I regularly stay in touch with. My best friendships are the ones where we can pick up a conversation from where we last left off like we never stopped talking with each other or the ones where we talk/check in with each other basically every day.

 

[tumut]

I think I intimidate people.

 

[coldpotato]

It's hit or miss with me. Sometimes I can meet someone and we will just hit it off right away and talk for hours and hours and feel like we've been friends for years. But sometimes I can be shy/guarded which can be misinterpreted as being "stuck up" or anything else negative, making people hesitant to even try to get to know me and become friends.

 

[Limon]

I have two real life friends and I barely talk to them as it is.

 

[Pintuition]

I’ve been terrible at it since forever! It’s just not something that comes easily to me. I think it’s become a self fulfilling prophecy- I now freeze up when I meet new people and preclude myself from making friends before I have the chance to get to know someone. I’ve had just about every friend I’ve had move away, become disinterested, or otherwise drop me. Only one has made it a super long time. I think now I’m scared of having that happen again so I don’t often pursue new friendships for fear of having someone hurt me!

 

[Neb]

With my autism and lifelong shyness I always expected people to come to me if they were interested. This worked wonders in Elementary school. I made several close friends back then who I still care about to this day. Sadly I never picked up the ability to open up with new people on my own. In most cases I either got ignored or insulted. It’s created a fear of snobby people that I’ve never really gotten over.

Online friendships are much easier for me to initiate. There’s no body language to interpret, you don’t have to hold eye contact, and you can find people with common interests quickly. With all of that social pressure removed, I can focus on making connections without fear.

 

[nightglow]

In a group of people there is usually one who likes me. Most people, don't like me. I make them uncomfortable or they find me boring. Most of the time I don't have anything to say and I am also happy and content just sitting next to someone to keep them company. Most people I have noticed feel awkward if there isn't constant engagement or if there is silence. And honestly I fine it uncomfortable and awkward if a person feels the need to constantly talk and can't handle some quiet. That may be more of an anxiety thing for me though. My hobbies are pretty much a one person only kind of thing. I don't go out and do exciting things or spend tons of money. Don't do parties, not a drinker but I will have fun baking cookies with you or watching a movie

 

[k e r f u f f l e]

I am good at making friends when I'm actively around a certain group. But I don't stick with a group for long, as I love doing things by myself! I haven't had a concrete friend in my entire life because of this.

I'm grateful for this trait because anyone that I've known who's had actual friends left with headaches. Now I'm biased against having friends whatsoever.

 

[Zane]

I have no flare for it, real life or online. I’m not a good talker and I’m not fun so I’m always confused and skeptical when anyone seems to like me. To be fair I almost never actively try to form connections with people even when I like them, I’m generally fine just having the occasional interaction Lol (at work, online, etc etc).
The few people I would really call friends though I love veeeery much!

 

[sleepydreepy]

I said neutral because I have to be in a certain headspace to make friends. When I'm in that mood I am great at making friends, but I don't feel that way very often.

 

[Cherry Tree]

I can get on with people very well, one skill you learn working in retail. However I only have a small group of close friends and due to lockdown I havent seen any of them since November last year. I have a hard time trusting people and letting them in so I tend to keep people further away until I can trust them