How do you meet friends/people in general?

[Chris]

I go to local events to meet people with similar interests. Most of the people I hang out with regularly I initially met through these events.

 

[Firesquids]

Two years later and still as lonely as ever. I want so badly to make a real connection and feel that spark when you meet someone who gets you. Constantly being the one to reach out is getting real old too, I'm tired and now on top of it, scared of rejection. I want to find a friendship where I don't have to put in 90% of the effort. I don't want to have to worry that I said the wrong thing and they are silently judging me while smiling to my face. I want to feel like I can unmask and be myself without unknowingly commiting some unforgivable social faux pas. I want someone to genuinely enjoy spending time with me.
This felt so much easier when I was a kid in school, now the opportunities feel so few and far in between. The only chances I've had recently to make some irl friends has been at my sister's co-worker's parties. It always goes that I don't know anyone, everyone is already in their own friend groups just chatting amongst themselves, and I end up sitting off to the side quietly working on some random art project. Feels bad, I think I'm done trying for a while.

 

[Acruoxil]

I prefer having as less friends as possible, so its easier to manage those friendships. Over the course of time I've met several people, its actually quite easy once you have the social skills to do it. I've met most of my friends through work, similar groups we're in, gym, hobbies etc.

 

[TN4U]

Two years later and still as lonely as ever. I want so badly to make a real connection and feel that spark when you meet someone who gets you. Constantly being the one to reach out is getting real old too, I'm tired and now on top of it, scared of rejection. I want to find a friendship where I don't have to put in 90% of the effort. I don't want to have to worry that I said the wrong thing and they are silently judging me while smiling to my face. I want to feel like I can unmask and be myself without unknowingly commiting some unforgivable social faux pas. I want someone to genuinely enjoy spending time with me.
This felt so much easier when I was a kid in school, now the opportunities feel so few and far in between. The only chances I've had recently to make some irl friends has been at my sister's co-worker's parties. It always goes that I don't know anyone, everyone is already in their own friend groups just chatting amongst themselves, and I end up sitting off to the side quietly working on some random art project. Feels bad, I think I'm done trying for a while.

You are me are on the same boat. Now with me being out of high school for six years and not taking college seriously, I too have fallen into obscurity with the real life crowd. The only meaningful discussions I ever have are with my co-workers, and they're all much older than me.
Heck, the last friend group I was in had people with vastly different political opinions, and there were times that I wondered if I would ever meet someone that shared most of my likes and interests.

These days, my motivation to go meet new friends in general is lacking heavily, as there really isn't any place close by that I can regularly go to and meet people my age. One of my co-workers is trying to push me to get out of the house daily, but all he's doing is forcing me to do things I don't really want to do, despite mental health pushback from me. I can't get along with my sister's friends, as she has way different interests and ideals compared to me (my sister is one of the extreme activist types). I would love to connect with some old high school friends again, but it would be too awkward to try and reach out to them with how long it's been. I guess I've gotta get lucky out in public; my idea of hanging out and having fun is way different that most people my age.

 

[PapaCrossing]

I don't know anymore. As a kid, I made friends that stood with me for decades. Up until lately, when the world became more divided (social media), a rift grew between my old friends and I. I plead with the younger crowd, do not obey social media. It cannot replace your real friends. I lost a best friend of **thirty years** because he obeyed his Twitter pals.

I made more friends in college, but after college ended, we all parted ways.

Now that I lost my friends, I really, really don't know how to make new ones. I hung out and friended some people on social media, but I would never meet them. They don't mention me in their real lives and vice versa. So, we were never really friends. If you want to debate or discuss this, let's go to dinner, I'm buying. Oh wait.

Sooner or later I'm hoping that I'll make a real friend in a natural way. Perhaps I should attend more group and social events more often, or something like that. It'll be more difficult for me since I no longer have that young innocence children have when making friends.

 

[ali.di.magix]

I truly don't know how to make friends as an adult lol. I make plenty of friends through work I suppose, but very rarely hang out with them outside of work. Most people have partners, kids or other friends...and I'm kinda just there. I've made acquaintances through sports and other activities, but I wouldn't consider them friends.

I have my group of friends I made through high school, and that's about it. I just do my own thing most of the time anyway.

 

[Rosch]

Through small talk. I like talking to people, even when I'm just waiting in line. I get easily acquainted with people, but it still all depends on their reply. If I already feel like their disinterested right from the get go, I stop talking because I know they don't like chatting.

 

[Jhine7]

I honestly met most of mine through college and work. And sports during high school.

 

[duckvely]

i meet people through school and work! i wish i had a friend i could talk to outside of school/work but making friends has always been incredibly difficult for me

 

[lieryl]

i definitely let people come to me both irl and online so far i’ve always been i guess “adopted” into friend groups because i am too shy to approach people first TT

 

[SkyKnight03]

I talk with someone randomly for two minutes:

"hey, here's my personal phone number and all my social media information".

I recently stopped doing this. It's not safe. Especially online. It also doesn't build meaningful friendships. It's basically just adding contacts that I barely know so I don't feel lonely.

Although i guess i'm trustworthy, because i've never had someone say no to the phone number thing.

to be honest all of these 'friendships' just fizzle out eventually.

 

[Liz!]

I don't make friends easily, mostly by choice. I'm very private with most people.
Sometimes someone just comes along that I click with. If we click, I'll stand by them and be there 100% for them.

 

[Kevinnn]

Aside from my current IRL friends that i somewhat talk to regularly, the main way I've made friends are either from college or raving, which I get is a very niche way but everyone tends to be friendly there. online friends are through other groups on discord (keyboards, gaming, etc)

 

[Dunquixote]

I make friends on here and I made some on twitter (I’m taking a break right now); twitter was the last place I expected to make friends , but when I joined cat twitter I made so many. I’m part of a few group chats; one we exchange cat christmas cards with each other every year. I wasn’t able to do it last year.

Meeting more people and making friends is extremely hard for me though. I’m on the spectrum, am pretty much a shut in. I’ve had too many misunderstandings and failed friendships it’s making me honestly a bit afraid to open up again. Part of me wants to make more friends some that are in same area I live in, but I’m not sure how to find friends here and honestly, right now I’m not ready or interested enough.

 

[JemAC]

most of my irl friends are people i attended high school with so we got to know each other through classes and shared interests, also friendly with a lot of people i work with and some of them i’d consider good friends and a few people i have got to know through events or parties - though that’s not a very common occurrence overall for me.

 

[Bob Zombie]

Almost always through work... I've moved between a lot of cities and countries so I've lost track of my early friends from where I grew up.

 

[Aniko]

I meet people by accident I would say. I'm not the kind to go out to make friends, I'm really introvert and solitary.

 

[Snowesque]

Online interest groups or work, it's usually circumstance.

 

[moonbyu]

all of my irl friends i've met through school. i've had no luck making any at my new school though

 

[Snek]

I am old enough now that I don't really need to meet new people. I've met plenty of people in my life and I know I am an introvert through and through so I don't really want to put myself through such situations again unless I am forced to by my husband.