LGBTQA - Discussion and support.

[Princess Weeb]

I'm not sure how I feel about trans teens killing themselves. Life is hard, especially for us transwomen. But if you are trans and reading this, you have to stay strong. I wasn't able to transition until this year and I just turned 21 in November. I was abused and belittled by my baptist raised step-father my entire freshman and sophomore years until I was kicked out of the house. Why those two years? Because he was finally convinced I was a ******. I refuse to talk to mom, to this day, since she wouldn't stand up for me. My friends didn't care about me in a few months either after I moved away. I locked away all that pain and tried to be the boy I was supposed to be for the next 5 years. It's the worst to feel completely unwanted due to something you can't control. I guess what I am trying to say is that once you get older and especially once you become financially independent, you can live the life you want. Things do get better. It may seem impossibly tough especially as a teen, but please, please don't kill yourself.

Kind a crappy way to spend my new year crying over a news story...

Even if our situations are similar, I don't think we can fully judge her or other people's situations and their motives behind self harm or suicide as a result.

Some people are able to cope with abuse, some people have support networks, some are mentally and emotionally stronger than others and some people may not even be able to act on their feelings, whether that is seeking help or channeling their feelings into self hate and self harm.

There are so many things that I am sure contributed to her decision, and it is clear that she really wanted that help and that change, but just couldn't find it. Time doesn't move as quickly as some people may think, and it looks as if she felt like she was in this sort of repetitive, pretty horrible cycle that would never end.

 

[radical6]

I mean even once you're grown up, trans women do face the danger of getting killed. Trans women, especially black trans women, have among the highest chances to be murdered. I felt like that also scared her, she was almost an adult and didn't want to deal with college and the loans because she knew her parents would not support her. All her other siblings had social media accounts and phones, she did not. They had photos of them posted everywhere, but her mom didn't put a single photo of her up. It's likely that her mom would care less about her on the streets once she was a grown adult either. She knew about the violence she could face, so I don't blame her.

My parents refuse to talk about it, and I have come close to running away, but since one of my family members are close to dying I am staying for them. I don't hate my parents, but I do get very upset when they refuse to help me with my dysphoria. It's worse then they snoop through everything I own for any mention of gender to make sure I'm not "dwelling" on that stuff. I've felt hopeless at times too, but idk. My school friends are somewhat supportive I guess, they don't get it but at least they use my preferred name and pronouns. I look forward to seeing my doctor only because she is the only adult who understands and accepts me. Except she officially diagnosed me with gender dysphoria, but I dont think my parents have looked at my medical records lately. It's a bit worrying though.

 

[Misuzurin]

I didn't mean to stir the pot up so. :/ Of course I think it is a tragedy. The situation's progression is far from the girl's own fault. All I really meant to say is things get better, they did for me at least.

 

[cannedcommunism]

This is horrible. We as a society desperately need to change in order to stop losing teenagers like this.

Denying your child's gender identity or sexual orientation is inherently abusive. Sending your child to conversion therapy is inherently abusive. Treating your child with anything but unconditional love and respect is neglectful and unacceptable and if you cannot do so you should not become a parent. Intentionally misgendering a person, regardless of your relationship to them or your feelings towards them, is unacceptable. If you disagree you need to educate yourself because you are part of a problem that takes young trans lives every day. There is nothing more important than treating people with kindness and respect. Rest in power, Leelah.

 

[Misuzurin]

Btw if you want to read the news story. http://www.patheos.com/blogs/progressivesecularhumanist/2014/12/transgender-teen-commits-suicide-cites-christian-parents-in-blog/

 

[NikoKing]

I'm all in support of the LGBT community and those who embrace it as a lifestyle. Those who are hombophobic *******s can **** of f for all I care...

 

[Princess Weeb]

To everyone who wants to support progression in the community after Leelah's death, if you can please go and sign some of the online petitions to do so.

Petition to ban Conversion Therapy which seeks to pretty much mentally and emotionally harm young people into believing that their identity or their preferences are wrong and shameful: https://www.change.org/p/president-...nsgender-conversion-therapy?just_created=true

Petition to get Leelah's correct name on her headstone after people feared she would be buried in a suit and remembered by her family as her male birth name: https://www.change.org/p/carla-l-al...rance?after_sign_exp=member_sponsored_upsells

I imagine there are quite a few others so please post them if you think that they need supporting.

 

[Punchy-kun]

To everyone who wants to support progression in the community after Leelah's death, if you can please go and sign some of the online petitions to do so.

Petition to ban Conversion Therapy which seeks to pretty much mentally and emotionally harm young people into believing that their identity or their preferences are wrong and shameful: https://www.change.org/p/president-...nsgender-conversion-therapy?just_created=true

Petition to get Leelah's correct name on her headstone after people feared she would be buried in a suit and remembered by her family as her male birth name: https://www.change.org/p/carla-l-al...rance?after_sign_exp=member_sponsored_upsells

I imagine there are quite a few others so please post them if you think that they need supporting.

Just because one person wants to be something he isn't, doesn't mean he can be it. Even when people do a physical gender change they still really are the gender they are born as. Nothing can change that. (Of course there are exceptions such as intersexuals which are physically different.)

About conversion therapy. Forcing someone to change never will help. A person only can change when he wants to. But I've got no problem with parents trying to explain their child(ren) something they're convinced is wrong. That's your right as a parent. That's education, something parents are giving way too little nowadays, and the results are obvious everywhere. Of course the end decisions go to the person itself, and someone who doesn't want to listen, you just eventually have to leave alone and just let do what they want.

This boy, Josh, who wanted to be a girl and wanted to be called Leelah, remains what he physically is born as. The only reason people are calling him a girl is because he wanted to be one. And I don't think that's any reason to misuse the word.

I think they should put his real name on the grave, and he should be buried as a male, because those things are what he is. We're talking about real gender here, not sexual orientation or preference.

You cannot change who you physically are. The only thing that really can be changed is sexual orientation.

Now of course I find it saddening that a person commits suicide. But it's clear to me that he couldn't handle the fact that he was who he was. He hated his parents because of this, but obviously hated himself as well.

 

[Brackets]

Just because one person wants to be something he isn't, doesn't mean he can be it. Even when people do a physical gender change they still really are the gender they are born as. Nothing can change that. (Of course there are exceptions such as intersexuals which are physically different.)

About conversion therapy. Forcing someone to change never will help. A person only can change when he wants to. But I've got no problem with parents trying to explain their child(ren) something they're convinced is wrong. That's your right as a parent. That's education, something parents are giving way too little nowadays, and the results are obvious everywhere. Of course the end decisions go to the person itself, and someone who doesn't want to listen, you just eventually have to leave alone and just let do what they want.

This boy, Josh, who wanted to be a girl and wanted to be called Leelah, remains what he physically is born as. The only reason people are calling him a girl is because he wanted to be one. And I don't think that's any reason to misuse the word.

I think they should put his real name on the grave, and he should be buried as a male, because those things are what he is. We're talking about real gender here, not sexual orientation or preference.

You cannot change who you physically are. The only thing that really can be changed is sexual orientation.

Now of course I find it saddening that a person commits suicide. But it's clear to me that he couldn't handle the fact that he was who he was. He hated his parents because of this, but obviously hated himself as well.

Please, someone has died. This is not the time to express your nonsense opinions. You have a misunderstanding of what gender is.

 

[Mercedes]

my parents don't wanna use gender neutral terms/pronouns towards me and i'm scared as heck to tell the rest of my family :-(
being in the closet sucks god...

Well it's not being in the closet you just wanna be called it them. You sould like a nobody that way.
And every body needs to be loved <3
- - - Post Merge - - -

@punchy-kun. Your right! I could not agree with you more.

- - - Post Merge - - -

Please, someone has died. This is not the time to express your nonsense opinions. You have a misunderstanding of what gender is.

A gender is male and female. It also has to do with sexual reproduction parts. Also "nonsense" is wrong, it's his opinion and he I and think it's correct. Not "nonsense". Not trying to offend anyone but I think your A. male B. female; then If you wanna be opposite gender get a gender change. Not say I'm a boy! And have female parts.

 

[lazuli]

@ punchy-kun and luckypinch
get out of here right now

i now see how totally possible it is for people to be so HORRIBLE

 

[Mercedes]

@ punchy-kun and luckypinch
get out of here right now

i now see how totally possible it is for people to be so HORRIBLE

How is it horrible??

 

[Aradai]

Just because one person wants to be something he isn't, doesn't mean he can be it. Even when people do a physical gender change they still really are the gender they are born as. Nothing can change that. (Of course there are exceptions such as intersexuals which are physically different.)

About conversion therapy. Forcing someone to change never will help. A person only can change when he wants to. But I've got no problem with parents trying to explain their child(ren) something they're convinced is wrong. That's your right as a parent. That's education, something parents are giving way too little nowadays, and the results are obvious everywhere. Of course the end decisions go to the person itself, and someone who doesn't want to listen, you just eventually have to leave alone and just let do what they want.

This boy, Josh, who wanted to be a girl and wanted to be called Leelah, remains what he physically is born as. The only reason people are calling him a girl is because he wanted to be one. And I don't think that's any reason to misuse the word.

I think they should put his real name on the grave, and he should be buried as a male, because those things are what he is. We're talking about real gender here, not sexual orientation or preference.

You cannot change who you physically are. The only thing that really can be changed is sexual orientation.

Now of course I find it saddening that a person commits suicide. But it's clear to me that he couldn't handle the fact that he was who he was. He hated his parents because of this, but obviously hated himself as well.

do you seriously have no decency? this girl died because her parents didn't accept her for who she was, the two people who are supposed to be there for her. how would you feel if you weren't accepted, and your peers said that "this isn't right, you need to be fixed"?
of course she hated herself, because her parents made her feel that she'd live through this horrid never-ending cycle of never being what she truly wanted to be. honestly, you have got to cut this out.

 

[Mercedes]

do you seriously have no decency? this girl died because her parents didn't accept her for who she was, the two people who are supposed to be there for her. how would you feel if you weren't accepted, and your peers said that "this isn't right, you need to be fixed"?
of course she hated herself, because her parents made her feel that she'd live through this horrid never-ending cycle of never being what she truly wanted to be. honestly, you have got to cut this out.

that boy!!! He just needed to learn not everyone is going to understand. I have nothing more to say..

 

[lazuli]

that boy!!! He just needed to learn not everyone is going to understand. I have nothing more to say..

NO LEELAH IS A GIRL YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT
leelah felt like a girl inside but was born a boy and her wanting acceptance was never fulfilled
HER PARENTS ERASED WHO SHE WAS WHEN THEY BURIED HER IN A SUIT AND PUT HER BIRTH NAME ON HER GRAVESTONE
IM P SURE HER MOM GOT HER AGE WRONG????

 

[Punchy-kun]

Guys, please calm down... I shared my opinion, which you don't have to agree with. No need to get angry, hateful or calling names.

 

[Brackets]

NO LEELAH IS A GIRL YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT
leelah felt like a girl inside but was born a boy and her wanting acceptance was never fulfilled
HER PARENTS ERASED WHO SHE WAS WHEN THEY BURIED HER IN A SUIT AND PUT HER BIRTH NAME ON HER GRAVESTONE
IM P SURE HER MOM GOT HER AGE WRONG????

seriously try not to get upset by those two. I think they're quite young and they post a lot of bull****. It's best just to ignore them I guess.

 

[Mercedes]

NO LEELAH IS A GIRL YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT
leelah felt like a girl inside but was born a boy and her wanting acceptance was never fulfilled
HER PARENTS ERASED WHO SHE WAS WHEN THEY BURIED HER IN A SUIT AND PUT HER BIRTH NAME ON HER GRAVESTONE
IM P SURE HER MOM GOT HER AGE WRONG????

No it was there child. They should have burryed him in a suit. He was 17. And his parents called him what ever his real name is. So they should have done that. AND I DINT UNDERSTAND HOW UR A BOY AND WANNA BE A GIRL??!

 

[TheCreeperHugz]

Guys, please calm down... I shared my opinion, which you don't have to agree with. No need to get angry, hateful or calling names.

Yes, you're giving your opinion, but this is supposed to be a support thread, so if your opinion isn't particularly supporting of the Current topic of discussion, it obviously isn't going to go down very well.

 

[Mercedes]

seriously try not to get upset by those two. I think they're quite young and they post a lot of bull****. It's best just to ignore them I guess.

Sorry? No I don't.