What's Bothering You?

[ali.di.magix]

Spoiler:

This isn't all about you.

You make it all about yourself - the struggles that you faced, and how difficult life is for you. There doesn't seem to be a day that passes by without any sort of self-pity or narcissistic rant.

Yet, I'm being the one that's called crazy. I'm the insane one in the family. Let us not forget who it was that put their hands around a child's neck, or threatened a child with a knife on more than one occassion, or caused a child to flinch or scream at their sudden move. I'm the one that's causing all the pain. I'm the godforsaken daughter that you're cursed with. I'm the manipulator, making you go everywhere to fulfill my needs.

I'm not the weakling that you think I am. I'm not the one who's broken, nor am I the person that's causing you pain. It's you. Don't go blaming all this on everyone else. You're the one that needs to understand how mentally distraught you are. I'm not going to let you drag me down.

you are so strong hun <3 I know that you've already risen above and beyond her

 

[xSuperMario64x]

My parents had to leave at 4 this morning and they accidentally woke me up before they left so now I can't go back to sleep :/

 

[Midoriya]

I want to use the bathroom, but there’s a GIANT COCKROACH in there, and so I can’t. And I can’t go to sleep either now. I wasn’t planning on pulling an all nighter, but I guess I am now. At least with this I can fix my sleep schedule.

 

[Princess Mipha]

I dunno why, but the last weeks I'm suffering so hard from depression or whatever it is supposed to be. Cant even listen to my fav music anymore because it just makes my heart race like crazy.. really gotta find a doctor or what so ever

 

[RedTropicalPeachyFish]

No appetite. -_-

 

[Midoriya]

I dunno why, but the last weeks I'm suffering so hard from depression or whatever it is supposed to be. Cant even listen to my fav music anymore because it just makes my heart race like crazy.. really gotta find a doctor or what so ever

Hey there, Franziska. I’m sorry to hear you’re going through this. I can relate as I went through a several week stretch of just not quite being myself not too long ago. All I can say is that it will get better for sure, because as of November I am starting to feel well again.

—-

Hhhhhhhh I’m so tired and I need to actually get some studying done, but I can’t because I’m tired. I need to start practicing self care more... I’m not taking well enough care of myself. I’m also just kind of shocked how much evil there can be in the world. I need to practice some self care, and then I need to get stronger...

 

[Psydye]

Think I'm getting a cold.

 

[Dawnpiplup]

I dunno why, but the last weeks I'm suffering so hard from depression or whatever it is supposed to be. Cant even listen to my fav music anymore because it just makes my heart race like crazy.. really gotta find a doctor or what so ever

I hope you do find someone who can give you a diagnosis. If you ever wanna talk about it, please don't hesitate to reach out to me. I care about you, love <3 wishing you the best, and try and stay strong.

 

[Sanaki]

Gotta bring my sister to an appointment really early this morning.

 

[Alienfish]

Gonna die from all this reading, what the **** were they thinking putting all this in less than like a week's time...

 

[Princess Mipha]

Hey there, Franziska. I’m sorry to hear you’re going through this. I can relate as I went through a several week stretch of just not quite being myself not too long ago. All I can say is that it will get better for sure, because as of November I am starting to feel well again.

I really hope that it will be the same for me,
but I kinda doubt it.. usually it was just my
medicine that wasn't set correctly, but I got that
checked and everything is fine there, so idk..

I hope you do find someone who can give you a diagnosis. If you ever wanna talk about it, please don't hesitate to reach out to me. I care about you, love <3 wishing you the best, and try and stay strong.

Thank you <3
Yes, I hope so too.. but finding someone who can either
speak german or english in France is so hard..
I mean, I can speak french, but if it's something
important like that I don't want to have any missunderstandings, so yeah.. my boyfriend being
all week long away for work is not helping either..
and still 3 1/2 weeks before there are holidays for him. :\

 

[Sanaki]

Spoiler:

This isn't all about you.

You make it all about yourself - the struggles that you faced, and how difficult life is for you. There doesn't seem to be a day that passes by without any sort of self-pity or narcissistic rant.

Yet, I'm being the one that's called crazy. I'm the insane one in the family. Let us not forget who it was that put their hands around a child's neck, or threatened a child with a knife on more than one occassion, or caused a child to flinch or scream at their sudden move. I'm the one that's causing all the pain. I'm the godforsaken daughter that you're cursed with. I'm the manipulator, making you go everywhere to fulfill my needs.

I'm not the weakling that you think I am. I'm not the one who's broken, nor am I the person that's causing you pain. It's you. Don't go blaming all this on everyone else. You're the one that needs to understand how mentally distraught you are. I'm not going to let you drag me down.

I’m so sorry you have to deal with a narcissistic parent if that’s what I’m understanding. I have two nParents as well and everything you said makes complete sense to me. Calling you lazy seems to be their specialty.... their fragile egos are so insufferable and I don’t want to say the generic stuff but you are not what they’re telling you. They’re just unloved children in adult bodies. If you ever need to rant or get more perspective on narcs you can visit the r/raisedbynarcissists subreddit. It’s super helpful and if you ever get gaslighted by them you can remind yourself that you’re so much stronger than them. Also, I’m sure you are well aware but how they speak to you isn’t normal. I used to believe their style of parenting was normal until I learned of the subreddit and It’s helped me handle it a lot better. I hope it can help if you choose to read it! <3

 

[Alienfish]

^not to hijack on your reply but i'll def go visit that subreddit..i told you abt my dad and he's def a controlling narcissist like hell so could be useful reading c; thanks

 

[Sanaki]

^not to hijack on your reply but i'll def go visit that subreddit..i told you abt my dad and he's def a controlling narcissist like hell so could be useful reading c; thanks

Oh don’t worry! Im glad it can help people cause it really helped me brush off my mother’s rants or whatever she calls me so I just hope it can help anyone else.



I’m mad right now because I thought my switch was charging last night but I got to the waiting room for my sisters appointment and it’s only 19%... so idk what happened :<

 

[Alienfish]

Oh don’t worry! Im glad it can help people cause it really helped me brush off my mother’s rants or whatever she calls me so I just hope it can help anyone else.



I’m mad right now because I thought my switch was charging last night but I got to the waiting room for my sisters appointment and it’s only 19%... so idk what happened :<

C:

And ugh yes it sucks when you forget charging things like that.. Sometimes I forget that or my phone being slow charging soI can't use it :/

 

[Stella-Io]

Spoiler: More negativity from yours truly

I'm so SICK and TIRED of this crap my manager keeps pulling. First a 10 hour shift no break cause he never actually confirmed that another person was going to come in to allow me to go on break. Then my other coworker calling out so I have to pick up the slack in the department. NOW he wants to work me a week straight after only getting a break on ThanksGiving only because the store is closed, otherwise I'm sure he'd have me work that day too. He expects me to do a complete 360 of my sleep schedule in just one day. After doing a week of closings (I've been coming in as mid and leaving as closer) he wants me to come in on Friday at 6am then put me as a mid and closer again. Working a god damn week straight with no ****ING day OFF. And nooo, I'm not allowed to feel tired or stressed, because I'm young I'll be fine. Like being young invalidates me from being stressed and tired. I'm so ****ed off I want to cry, which doesn't help cause I hate crying when mad. It's just so stupid I'm not sad I'm ticked OFF.

Whenever I talk about it to my parents they just say that's life, roll with it. They say I complain when I get little hours but then complain when I get alot. I'm COMPLAINING BECAUSE I DONT GET A BREAK. I'm not allowed to come in stressed or tired at work, I'm not allowed to be in a mood, I'm not allowed to bring my feelings to work. I'm supposed to come in, do the job in a timely manner then repeat the next day.

I'm not happy with how my life is. It sucks. I'm half miserable. I'm stressed or tired all the time, or both. I wake up tired. I get headaches almost daily, which was never normal for me. I go to sleep stressed. I hate it. Everything I do feels like a chore. Waking up, eating, taking showers, brushing my teeth, getting changed out of my sleep clothes, everythin feels like a god damn chore and I hate it. I actually think this is the worse part, basic self care feeling like a drag, esp when I'm so adamant to others to take care of themselves. I've skipped on doing self care stuff cause it requires me to wake up earlier, something I already hate doing, to make ****ing time to take a shower or eat breakfast. I never have any time to do stuff I actually enjoy anymore. I'm not excited for the holiday, I don't get happy anymore. I hate life rn. I want it to change but with the holiday season nothing will get better for another month or so. It feels like it can't get any worse at this point but I'm sure it will.

Life sucks.

 

[Sanaki]

C:

And ugh yes it sucks when you forget charging things like that.. Sometimes I forget that or my phone being slow charging soI can't use it :/

I have the old switch too so the battery is terrible >.>

 

[Midoriya]

Spoiler: More negativity from yours truly

I'm so SICK and TIRED of this crap my manager keeps pulling. First a 10 hour shift no break cause he never actually confirmed that another person was going to come in to allow me to go on break. Then my other coworker calling out so I have to pick up the slack in the department. NOW he wants to work me a week straight after only getting a break on ThanksGiving only because the store is closed, otherwise I'm sure he'd have me work that day too. He expects me to do a complete 360 of my sleep schedule in just one day. After doing a week of closings (I've been coming in as mid and leaving as closer) he wants me to come in on Friday at 6am then put me as a mid and closer again. Working a god damn week straight with no ****ING day OFF. And nooo, I'm not allowed to feel tired or stressed, because I'm young I'll be fine. Like being young invalidates me from being stressed and tired. I'm so ****ed off I want to cry, which doesn't help cause I hate crying when mad. It's just so stupid I'm not sad I'm ticked OFF.

Whenever I talk about it to my parents they just say that's life, roll with it. They say I complain when I get little hours but then complain when I get alot. I'm COMPLAINING BECAUSE I DONT GET A BREAK. I'm not allowed to come in stressed or tired at work, I'm not allowed to be in a mood, I'm not allowed to bring my feelings to work. I'm supposed to come in, do the job in a timely manner then repeat the next day.

I'm not happy with how my life is. It sucks. I'm half miserable. I'm stressed or tired all the time, or both. I wake up tired. I get headaches almost daily, which was never normal for me. I go to sleep stressed. I hate it. Everything I do feels like a chore. Waking up, eating, taking showers, brushing my teeth, getting changed out of my sleep clothes, everythin feels like a god damn chore and I hate it. I actually think this is the worse part, basic self care feeling like a drag, esp when I'm so adamant to others to take care of themselves. I've skipped on doing self care stuff cause it requires me to wake up earlier, something I already hate doing, to make ****ing time to take a shower or eat breakfast. I never have any time to do stuff I actually enjoy anymore. I'm not excited for the holiday, I don't get happy anymore. I hate life rn. I want it to change but with the holiday season nothing will get better for another month or so. It feels like it can't get any worse at this point but I'm sure it will.

Life sucks.

Hey, Stella. I know I already messaged you to try and help, but I really hope you can enjoy at least some of your day. That really does suck what your job is making you go through. I can relate with the first job I had in retail, although I don’t think it was that bad. Try to stay positive and find the light in the dark. <3

 

[Dawnpiplup]

snip

Thank you, love. I've actually checked out that subreddit before. It's upsetting for people to be subjected to narcissistic behaviors... especially when it's their parents. I can definitely check it out more, though. I'm sorry that you had to deal with narcissistic parents as well. </3

 

[xSuperMario64x]

My parents had to leave at 4 this morning and they accidentally woke me up before they left so now I can't go back to sleep :/

I ended up falling asleep at like 7:30am and now it's 2:30 and I just woke up. I guess I won't be sleeping tonight!