What's Bothering You?

I got back from family vacation, and immediately got super sick with Covid, despite the fact I avoided it for three whole years. I feel super delayed on commissions, and summer classes started today 😓 and I've stressed myself overthinking all of it :(
 
I hate seeing nice things on Ebay and realizing the seller is from Morocco, but their item says it’s coming from a US state. That’s a red flag for me. Normally it wouldn’t be, but I don’t know about the quality of the thing. Especially with apparel, you just never know. The design might be cool but that means nothing if it’s cheaply made.
 
The neighbors (a church) cut down my favorite tree??? and I think it might have been directly on the property line, so I'm not even sure if what they did was legal...

The tree was probably hundreds of years old. It was a beautiful oak tree and it provided so much shade/privacy/beauty. ; ; Lots of squirrels and birds would visit which my cat loved to enjoy from the deck. Now there's nothing, just a big, depressing, branchless stump.
Ugh, I’m so sorry…I hate when people cut down trees for no reason, it’s so sad. Trees are homes, and shelter, and provide food for so many animals. It’s just so sad, and animals don’t understand what happened to their home. I especially hate it during This season when birds have nests 😭. Our neighbor cut down two trees recently and one of them overhung our yard and provided tons of shade and privacy. Now it’s just blah. I feel you on this to my very core.❤️
 
i would like to take my brain out of my head and smash it against a wall for a few minutes. i’ve had ridiculous brain fog this entire month so far and it’s not going away no matter what i do !! i have 6 assignments to do, and more on the way because apparently it’s illegal for me to relax, and i can’t work on any of them because my brain!! will!! not!! work!! i am the epitome of no thoughts, head empty right now and i have 17 days to complete all 6 assignments before final assessments start and quite frankly i don’t think a diploma is worth the last 7 years of my life and my sanity
 
i had an anxiety attack because i got lost on the way home today.. i literally ran around crying because i entered the wrong bus :( i kinda feel embarrassed and im stillshaking too
 
my brother invited his ex to come to my mums birthday dinner, and i dont rlly like his ex.. hes just really mean to everyone and has done a ton of things i dont think i can share, but ill be uncomfortable w him [the ex] around at the birthday dinner :(
 
I had my first hair appointment in forever today and my haircut didn't turn out the way I wanted..

Going to attempt to fix it! 🤞
 
im back only to talk about my problems

ive been having shortness of breathing for about 2 weeks now randomly but it’s started to bother me today. I looked it up and it came up with symptoms that scared the living **** outta me (heart failure, lung failure, pneumoni..) and asthma but I’m hoping it’s just that idkk… should I see a doctor or something? i havent rlly told anyone
 
Ugh, I’m so sorry…I hate when people cut down trees for no reason, it’s so sad. Trees are homes, and shelter, and provide food for so many animals. It’s just so sad, and animals don’t understand what happened to their home. I especially hate it during This season when birds have nests 😭. Our neighbor cut down two trees recently and one of them overhung our yard and provided tons of shade and privacy. Now it’s just blah. I feel you on this to my very core.❤️
It helps to hear, thank you for understanding, though I hate to learn that you're going through it too! I know for a fact that the tree was home to so many animals, and others used the tree to access nests in other places.

In addition to cutting down the oak tree, they maimed every other tree on their property by removing branches so the trees can't grow anymore. I just can't wrap my head around this madness.
 
Two main things, both related to job hunting:

  • I'm worried about my WiFi for job interviews. I use portable Wifi (Galaxy 5G Mobile Wi-Fi but use on 2.4G normally) which is unlimited, but in the past few weeks it's gone down suddenly and required me to restart it. It tends to do this during video calls, I'm assuming it gets to be too much and that's why but this would obviously be an issue for online interviews. On Google Meet I changed my settings to send/receive lower quality video and Zoom I already have HD turned off. If I use more than 15G in a 3-day period the speed is supposed to be throttled but I can't really tell the difference and it has cut out even before reaching 15G. As a test, I am going to try using less WiFi to keep it under 15G and see if that helps. I will also make sure my laptop is the only thing connected to WiFi during an interview, and restart/sign out of programs before hand to try to clear things up. I may also ask a person in the store I bought it for for advice since they have been helpful before.
  • I'm uncertain if/when my recruiter is sending my resume to the job I really want. We talked on Saturday, and he said he'd prepare things and send in my app on Monday when the work week starts again. I told him I wanted to rewrite my resume/CV to make it stronger first and send it to him on Monday and he said he'd wait for it. Rewriting it ended up taking a lot longer than expected, so I sent him an email saying I would need more time but would still send it that day and he replied saying he understood. I ended up sending it around midnight saying if there were no issues I wanted to apply. Normally I would wait until business hours but I know he works around these late hours. Anyways, on Tuesday I didn't hear back from him, and I didn't again today. Since before he'd reply to every email, even the minor ones, I was assuming he'd say he got my files and sent them in. I didn't want to be rude and ask directly if he did it yet so I sent an email this evening making up a question about the job position and saying that I would still apply no matter his answer. He replied 20 min later with some info but said he'd contact the company to confirm. But, he didn't mention my app. This made me worried if he didn't notice my email with my resume/CV since before his emails were precise so I decided to be more direct. I thanked him for doing that and then asked if there were any issues with my resume/CV files from before, but he didn't reply. This is a dream job for me + he said this company takes a long time for the hiring process, since I have a timeline for finding a job I want to get started on this right away. I'm worried if he has sent it in already or not and what I can do.
Dang I wrote a lot LOL
 
Can someone help like I’m going to the DMV in a few hours and I wanna know can I change my gender to the gender neutral option? I think the gender on your plane ticket for tsa needs to match the gender on your id and I don’t wanna screw something up…. Plane ticket has Female for me I believe
 
It's hard not to be salty at the hospital cause like 4 days before my moms stroke she rushed herself to the ER and said I feel wrong and I think imma have a stroke. The doctor literally told her it's just anxiety and sent her home. Then she had her stroke 4 days later and is now permanently paralyzed on the right side of her body. If the doctor hadn't brushed her off or ignored her, she might still be able bodied. Pisses me off, i wanna eat that doctors face
 
I haven’t posted on here in a really long time.

Anyways, my allergies have been worse than ever.
 
local LGBT+ group had to cancel the Pride Kick-Off event cause of course there's a hate group in Ohio that's been targeting LGBT+ people. just absolutely disgusting creatures, I dare not even call them human because no genuine human being on this planet would lack so much empathy that they would go out their way to publically organize harassment and violence towards LGBT+ adults and especially youth. it's abhorrent.
 
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