What's Bothering You?

sometimes I don't really know what to do with myself, I think that thing I talked about yesterday is carrying over into today. I probably need to just let myself rest.

I said I can never catch a break. well, I never let myself catch a break either, not without some feeling of internalized guilt.

I feel like I need more rest and I am going back to sleep.
 
Chris said:
Sod's Law.

Please share photos of the nails (also hair if you're comfortable)!
Click to expand...
Yep, sure is! That’s funny, here we more often hear Murphy’s Law, and I always say that Murphy and I go way back as friends. I totally planned on sharing photos is the “What Do You Look Like” thread when I’m all dressed up! I do love how my hair and nails came out.
 
It sucks having a dead father on Father's Day. Especially because you can't go out in public without it being shoved down your throat.

Ugh I can't wait until it's over.

June has not been my month. Hopefully today can be a silver lining. I'm finally getting to do something that I really wanted for a while.
 
A while ago, I woke up from this dream where pretty much all that happened was me being bullied and people being mean to me. That was horrible. That was probably one of the worst dreams I’ve had recently. This has happened before in real life when I was in middle school, and that dream made me remember all of it. I’m not sure if this is better or worse than waking up at 7 and not being able to fall back asleep.

I wish I wasn’t so nice to people back then and actually stood up for myself. Maybe then this wouldn’t have ever happened.
 
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just now i was at home depot with my father and younger brother and a lady fell to the ground and passed out. she stopped breathing so my dad and her family helped turn her to her side and she started vomiting while someone called 911. we did what we could to help while the ambulance came and i did see them wheel her out.

however during this i was absolutely baffled by the fact that half of the people who saw her ignored her and pretended that she wasn’t there. like literally walking around her and acting like nothing was happening. where are people’s hearts nowadays? it triggered me more than i can express.
 
it's so fun of me to have to put all the discord servers i'm in in a folder to hide them because i feel like an intruder in each and every one and looking at them just makes me sad. i honestly just want to leave all of them but then that'll probably start awkward conversations and fomo will kick in and i just don't want to.

this isn't directed at any discord server or any person specifically because no one has actually done anything wrong i'm just. i'm tired. i'm so so tired. i'm so tired of showing up in here and complaining about how unwanted i feel. i'm so tired of noticing the difference between how someone interacts with me and how they interact with others.

it really just doesn't matter whether i'm kind or not. what i say or what i do. i could offer to cut my arm off for someone and they'll still like someone else more. all of my efforts and my kindness are in vain and i'm tired. if this is how trying to fit in feels then i don't want to. i don't want friends or to try and make friends if it's going to feel this awful.

i'm better off by myself. being lonely doesn't hurt like this.
 
Minor thing:

I don't know how people actually manage to win eBay auctions. I mean, I know, but it has just never worked for me for as long as I've used the site. Always prefer when they just have a Buy Now option. The thing I was trying to get wasn't like, super important or anything, it just would've been neat to own. Oh well.
 
my printer isn’t working and i don’t know what’s wrong with it other than it isn’t detecting ink from a new cartridge. i can’t call canon customer support because of course they want to charge me $20 just for a call. they have a support forum but who frequents a website for a PRINTER?? absolutely wild that this is something that they do.
 
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Halloqueen said:
Minor thing:

I don't know how people actually manage to win eBay auctions. I mean, I know, but it has just never worked for me for as long as I've used the site. Always prefer when they just have a Buy Now option. The thing I was trying to get wasn't like, super important or anything, it just would've been neat to own. Oh well.
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I always wanted to be petty with ebay snipers/bots and just bet like $1 below their default bid so they have to pay 'full price' lol
 
i've been breaking out so much lately and it's made me so much more insecure :< i've struggled with acne for years honestly, and my skin was doing so good before march, when i randomly got a breakout on my jawline/neck, its so stubborn and will not go away, ive tried so many spot treatments, different face washes, and i dont understand what triggered it in the first place!!! but now im feeling so insecure and makes me not wanna show my face anywhere lol
 
its been 6 months since i ended my last relationship, and all the feelings i had for him basically went away before i even ended things. from what i remember, he treated me horribly. but then i remember the nice things he did for me? then i feel stupid, like it wasnt all bad but at the same time i remember the bad, small things he did that added up and made me feel horrible. anyways, come to find out hes talking to a new girl it makes me feel sick?? idk why?? i know i dont want him back, but why do i feel sad that hes moving on.... ive moved on too, ive already gone on dates and everything which makes me seem like a hypocrite. i assume its because i dont want him to be happy because of the way he treated me? like idk how to put my feelings into words but everytime i think about him with someone else it makes me feel so sick and makes me sad at the same time ????? like how is it fair that he gets to be w another girl but im over here still struggling with the way he left me emotionally, to the point its affecting my relationships with new people. it feels so silly and petty to be upset over something like this, there are bigger things in the world to be worried about but im here upset over my ex LOL i really dont even know what i feel anymore, i just hate that hes out there possibly being happy and im just not, im struggling
 
Today has already been a roller coaster of emotions. Maybe I should have taken today off too. Slightly worried about what I will walk into today at work after being off for a week.
Today would have been my grandfather’s Birthday and though he passed years ago I still miss him. I miss our talks and walks in the park . I miss how I could always go to him with anything. He was kind and loving and always accepted me . I don’t always feel that way with most of my family. I just miss my Papa Bear.

It doesn’t help that today is Father’s Day. I miss the person I thought I knew . I wish we could have had a good relationship but no matter how hard I tried it wasn’t meant to be. Whenever you are I hope you are well. I still care about you and always will.
 
I've already had my Internet connection looked at, and despite having connection, a few times my laptop will suddenly mess up and say 'Connected, no internet'

But I'm using it right now on my phone and it's fine. The router is displaying the correct light so I dunno why it's being like this.
 
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