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What's Bothering You?

I’m sick of my life. I have no meaning or purpose anymore. People always say that when a parent of yours dies you get “stronger” or more “mature,” but it has been several months since my mom died now and all I feel is pain and sadness that won’t go away. I desperately want a hug or something from someone other than my family, but I can’t receive one right now, and no one would give me one anyway. I’m sick of growing up and everything, ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING associated with it. I can’t get a decent job that I like even though I have a degree, and I’m not super happy about the interview I have next week since it’s for a job that isn’t close. The ONLY person who has comforted me the most during these times is my significant other, and if she wasn’t around I don’t know where I would be right now. Therapy doesn’t help either. I’ve already met with a therapist last year and it didn’t help at all, and it was a good therapist. I feel like I’m all on my own and no one gives a crap about me or what I want to accomplish in life. I might as well continue to play video games and watch anime for the rest of my life and do nothing productive with it until I die, and when I’m dying I can be full of regrets about everything. I also hate how people say I’m smart or I’m strong or good-looking or whatever, because I’m not. I’m just sick and done with everything and everyone!
 
Oh gosh I hope you don't mind my responding to this but this just hit me in the feels in a lot of ways. I've lost a parent myself so I feel like I've been there. Grief is a journey and any sort of way you are feeling is completely valid. Some days are easier than others.

I also relate to the hug thing. I'm not even really a hugger but this whole year has been very very isolating that I have definitely been missing human connection..
I wish I could offer some real help or anything but I just hope you know that you aren't the only one who has felt this way.
 
Oh gosh I hope you don't mind my responding to this but this just hit me in the feels in a lot of ways. I've lost a parent myself so I feel like I've been there. Grief is a journey and any sort of way you are feeling is completely valid. Some days are easier than others.

I also relate to the hug thing. I'm not even really a hugger but this whole year has been very very isolating that I have definitely been missing human connection..
I wish I could offer some real help or anything but I just hope you know that you aren't the only one who has felt this way.

Thank you. Just the response is enough. I thought that if I just didn’t post here and bottled up my feelings forever that I could ignore it, but it doesn’t work that way. I’m high in emotional intelligence and I feel things very strongly, so it’s just taking me awhile to come to terms with this I guess. I really appreciate it. 🙏
 
I really hate when you google something and you get like 20 pinterest results as the top ones... you can't even click around there unless you're a member and I have no intention ever registered. SHOO SHOO.
 
I really hate when you google something and you get like 20 pinterest results as the top ones... you can't even click around there unless you're a member and I have no intention ever registered. SHOO SHOO.

Worst part is when it's very clearly something re-posted to pinterest without permission and you can't find the original anywhere.​
 
I think I'm the only person on earth who doesn't miss connecting w people lol, I could be perfectly content to just hide all day and never talk to anyone 😆😆
(I know it's a big issue w the pandemic rn, that people can't really interact and all that, but idk I'm pretty content living in isolation lol)


also it's almost 11 and I'm wondering if I should go now to get something to eat and risk them not having lunch stuff out yet, or if I should make myself wait a bit longer. I've already been awake for like two hours so I would rather not wait any more 😔
 
Funny thing, before that I was thinking about getting a funko pop of Shirley from Community wearing the apron with baguettes in a cross saying "He is risen".
Ayyy I love community!
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I really hate when you google something and you get like 20 pinterest results as the top ones... you can't even click around there unless you're a member and I have no intention ever registered. SHOO SHOO.
Pinterest SUCKS. I can’t stand websites that make you register just to look. Plus, they never let you delete your account. Can you say: invasive?
 
I really hate when you google something and you get like 20 pinterest results as the top ones... you can't even click around there unless you're a member and I have no intention ever registered. SHOO SHOO.
This used to happen to me when I was looking for New Leaf/Happy Home Designer QR codes.
I usually can't scan the Pinterest ones straight from Google... I tried...
 
Ayyy I love community!
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Pinterest SUCKS. I can’t stand websites that make you register just to look. Plus, they never let you delete your account. Can you say: invasive?
Is the delete account option they have not a true deletion of your account?
 
My sister went on her date, had her friends come over and they called me creepy when I was in the vicinity when I was just trying to pass through. When I looked back at them to know that they’re not being slick, they acted all innocent and then my sister felt it was necessary to tell me to clean the bathroom that I did not make a mess out of seconds after? I was like lol nope.

I also felt that my social skills were getting worse today with simple conversations with peers and postal office transactions. Every little thing went wrong and I am embarrassed. I also couldn’t focus driving and made a lot of mistakes. I actually felt like I was shutting down. I guess it’s just one of those days.
 
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I would be sound asleep right now if my stupid clock didn't make this weird subtle noise in the middle of the night..... Three times. Before that, I was having a good sleep until my clock spoiled it. After I solved the problem, I had a hard time getting back to sleep. I want to punch it so bad, but I'd end up waking up my family. And since I'm on here, I might as well vent some other things that have been bothering me as of late.

- I've been getting mad a little too easy for some reason and I don't like it.
- My phone is constantly telling me that my cloud storage and full. It's been going on for months now and I don't know how to stop getting those notifications day after day. It even went beyond by reminding me on my email. Can't you see I'm not interested in expanding my storage?!?!
- I'm struggling to get back to playing New Horizons recently. The issues with the game are really starting to show when you're not that type of person who loves to design the island and is more of talking with your villagers. The lack of single player stuff doesn't make it any better.
- This pandemic is likely pushing back my driving test AGAIN. I want to drive to be able to help my parents and not be dependent all the time.
- It's almost a year since I graduated from college and yet, I still haven't applied for a job because the industry I'm going into has been hit heavily by this pandemic.

Ugh, I want to punch my clock so badly for waking me up in the middle of the night.
 

Hey, friend. I’m sorry your clock woke you up and that you’re dealing with a lot. I can relate to a lot of this, especially about New Horizons and being out of college. I really enjoyed showing you my island the last time we played, so maybe I should come visit your island soon since I don’t think I’ve seen it yet. Would really like to see it. I hope you’re able to get some rest (this is Midoriya, btw). :)
 
I dislike being so anxious. So anxious that I can't even talk correctly. I feel like I can't be taken seriously because of my anxiety and how it effects me. I feel like I make some people uncomfortable by bringing my anxious energy around and my anxiety rubs off on them. I feel like I'm a nuisance.
 
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