The Internet's Worst Advice Column

[Clock]

Just throw up, nothing else can work
How can I run faster?

 

[sigh]

you can't. give up while you're ahead. you'll never be naruto

how i can achieve financial stability?

 

[Zerous]

Spend all your money - your money will be stable at 0

How can I efficiently study for my exams?

 

[Shellzilla_515]

Cram everything the night before the exams. How can I use mayonnaise as an instrument.

 

[Clock]

How can I get rid of an ear worm? I keep hearing something annoying in my head

 

[Xara]

eat it


how do you start waking up earlier?

 

[Shellzilla_515]

Have someone drive a motorcycle really loud very early in the morning. How do I take pictures?

 

[Dawnpiplup]

Easy, you just find something you like and blink your eyes - the image will be saved in your memory!

How do I find a good college roommate?

 

[InstantNoodles]

Use craigslist!

How can I cool down on hot summer days?

 

[Shellzilla_515]

Go to Pluto.

How can I find mangoes?

 

[Neb]

Head to the Arctic!

How do I get over a crush?

 

[Shellzilla_515]

Simple, just crush them!

Any tips on planting flowers?

 

[Clock]

Just dump all of the flowers seeds, bury them and water them. That’s the best way of gardening.
How can I remove oil?

 

[Neb]

Throw a match on it! It’ll be gone before you can say, “it smells funny in here.”

How do you get a driver’s license?

 

[Shellzilla_515]

Have Spongebob teach you how to drive. After that, take your driver's license test with Mrs. Puff and you should be golden!

How do I exterminate bugs?

 

[GalacticGhost]

Just use your net to catch them all, and then donate them to the museum! If your net breaks, just craft another one.

I'm hungry, what should I eat?

 

[Cutesy]

eat all the bugs that have already been donated to the museum

my earphones aren't working. what should i do?

 

[Xara]

turn them on and off

i think i broke my leg, what do i do?

 

[Clock]

Use toilet paper as bandages and call 911
How can you cook without a heat source?

 

[InstantNoodles]

Eat everything raw - it'll be fine!

How can I cure motion sickness?